[MollyMac]

I am finding that I work with the kind of attention whores that will only get paid in food stamps... christ... I never wanted someone to get fired-EVER- until the last few months...

One of us needs a hobby. I guess I will get my ass back into the gym or just walk away on the job...

And I am finding more and more that snacking on ice is my key to staying gainfully employed. I am constantly sucking on a bit of ice at work- and it works in my favor two ways-

The first is that when someone says something incredibly stupid and indefensible, you can crush your molars right through the chunk of ice- this saves you from grinding your teeth each other or else trying to jump out of your chair, sinking your canines and incisors into their shoulder and tearing out their stringy, under-developed trapezius muscle (which in turns saves a psych evaluation and jail time- but you lose the opportunity to make a new girlfriend named Bull Dagga at State. Such is the great compromise of life)

The second is that when that person who says something incomprehensible is your boss, your mouth is too numb to form an immediate response- (the honest, visceral response that usually involves profanity or just the phrase "Holy fuckity puppy-suck, Batman!")- and you have to wait for your tongue to thaw and so you are allowed time to pretend to be thinking and choosing your words carefully and form a more acceptible response. Excellent trick for when your mouth is faster than your brain and you have a tenedency to shoot first, ask no questions, and enjoy a firm Granny Smith amidst the carnage, and then wonder why everyone thinks you are aggressive.