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I usually just go with the pronouns that line up with one's presentation, which factors in dress, hairstyle and name.
If some one is in the sgm community and I can't tell one way or the other I'll ask which pronouns one prefers.
Did you find any cool gender neutral pronouns? My favorite is zie/zir (I've got a thing for the letter z). In practice I end up using they/their/them in general conversation especially if I haven't had my coffee yet.
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