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Old 08-12-2008, 10:42 PM   #1
Jaye Jang
 
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Unhappy Traumatic Movie Experiences

Okay, this could just as easily go under the "My Mother is Hilarious" thread, but I don't want to steal GM's thunder. So,just to give you a head's up, my mom is like this: I'm petting the cat. My mom comes up and says, "That cat has fleas, you know." I say, "Thanks mom. You could have told me that first." Momster, "Thanks yourself. You could have asked me that first."

So. Expurgated version of my personal movie trauma. I go by to see my mom, who is in her 70's and irascible. I tell her I would like to take her to the movies, which turned out to ba a bad idea. The conversation goes like this:

Me: "Mom. I'd like to take you to a movie. Feel up to it?"
Momster: "What movie? I'm not sure I'm feeling up to it if it's gonna be a lousy movie."
Me: "Chronicles of Narnia. I heard it's pretty good."
Momster, who is slightly hard-of-hearing, but will NEVER admit it: "Chronicles of Nerdia? That's a stupid subject for a movie? Who'd make a movie chronicling nerds."
Me: "No, Mom. Chron-i-cles of Nar-ni-a."
Momster: "Who's Nardia?"
Me, getting frustrated: "That's Narnia, and it's not a who, it's a what."
Momster: Then my dad calls, who is also hard-of-hearing and refuses to wear his hearing aids. He asks my mom what's up. She tells him, 'Your daughter is taking me to the movies." She's shouting. He's shouting back, so now we have a three-way conversation. He says, 'What movie?" She says, "I don't know. It has something to do with nard. You know that stuff the lady poured on Jesus' feet in the Bible. I think the movie has something to do with perfume."
Me: "No, mom. It's about Nar-nee-aa. It's a place."
Momster: In the meantime telling dad the movie is called, "Articles of Clothing, or something like that." I repeat the title. She yells into the phone that it's about something I-C-L-E-S and something I-A. She's thinking, 'Icicles in Suburbia' like we don't see enough of those in the winter."
Me: "I give up. You two work it out." At that point, my dad is shouting into the phone that he knows what movie she's talking about. It's called 'Chronicicles of Hernia', and why someone would make a movie about hernias is stupid beyond belief. At that point, my younger brother walks in and informs the Momster that the movie is about Prince Caspian. Big help, bro.
MOMSTER: To my dad, still yelling, "It's about some prince whose gasping. I'm telling your son if he wants to see some prince gasp he should go visit his father in the nursing home. They treat you like a prince and you're always gasping, anyway." I give up and decide to just go ahead and take the Momster to the movie.

Bad idea. I spend the movie cringing in my seat. Momster spends it yelling and hooting at the bad guys, loudly asking who has the hernia and who's supposed to be gasping (they all seem to be breathing just fine), and threatening to smack the guy in front of us with her popcorn bag for snoring through the movie.

Moral of the story: Never take your elderly mother to the movies. Baaad idea.
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Old 08-13-2008, 03:33 AM   #2
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Hehehe, sounds like my grandparents
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Old 08-13-2008, 11:49 AM   #3
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I watched Salo while stoned... traumatic is not the word.
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:15 PM   #4
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I watched a horrifying gory alien flick when I about 5. There was a scene in which a man got his brain sucked out by an alien with a mouth like a straw, that caused me to cry and huddle up to my mother. I don't actually remember being particularly scared of anything up until that point.


I still get a bit uncomfortable thinking about it now.
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Old 08-26-2008, 06:50 PM   #5
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E.T. traumatized me as a child. :/
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Old 08-26-2008, 07:03 PM   #6
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Short Circuit 2 actually made me cry when I was 4. They beat that poor robot so bad. I cried damn hard.
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Old 08-26-2008, 07:17 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MoonGloom
E.T. traumatized me as a child. :/
Holy fuck, me too!!!!!
I even flinched when I read its name in your post.
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Old 08-26-2008, 07:23 PM   #8
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I can't remember any movie actually traumatizing me...
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Old 08-26-2008, 07:26 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MoonGloom
E.T. traumatized me as a child. :/
Same. To this day I cannot watch it.

What really got me was when my friend forced me to watch Saw 1-3 all in a row without potty breaks.
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Old 08-27-2008, 09:55 AM   #10
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Gremlins. I was ten, I think, and I have never ever been so scared in my entire life as when the thingies start changing into monsters. I still haven´t been able to finish that movie.
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Old 09-02-2008, 04:58 PM   #11
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Alien when i was like 8? E.T: didnt make me sleep for 2 days when i was about the same age and IT that gave me freaking nightmares for a few nights. My mother also did let me watch X-files...great mistake... I still have a huge weakness for aliens...they scare me a lot...and NO E.T. is not cute!!!
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Old 09-03-2008, 01:23 PM   #12
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I had a traumatic movie experience the other week.
It was my friend's birthday, and she had invited three friends--including me--to sleep at her house, one of which had picked up the movie Sickle for £2 and presented it to her as a birthday gift.

Undoubtedly the worst film any of us had ever, ever seen.

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