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Whining This forum is for general whining. Please post all suicide threats, complaints about significant others, and statements about how unfair school is to this board. |
08-05-2010, 11:49 AM
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#26
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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Who said anything about chopping?
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08-05-2010, 11:51 AM
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#27
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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I was under the impression that machetes are generally used for chopping.
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08-05-2010, 11:58 AM
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#28
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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Hey I could have used the machete for fish or cuting the heads of the zombie twilight fans.
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08-05-2010, 12:09 PM
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#29
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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Be careful which twitards you chop into pieces... some of them are my friends and family.. *sniff* even if they are slightly zombified.
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08-05-2010, 12:17 PM
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#30
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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Hey why don't we make a remake of I am legend but we take one of the zombie and strap them to a table and try to help them.
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08-05-2010, 12:25 PM
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#31
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Give me The Omega Man any day!
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Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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08-05-2010, 01:31 PM
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#32
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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Heh heh....I wonder if soylent green is good with soy sauce.
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08-05-2010, 02:37 PM
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#33
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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I think it will add a nice kick to the victims.
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08-05-2010, 03:23 PM
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#34
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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Very well, bring out the victim-child.
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08-05-2010, 03:39 PM
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#35
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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"igor!"
*hunched man wobbles over to child and straps her to the chair*
"Now child who are you?"
SILENCE
*gets a picture of edwin, child squeals*
"This is a very bad man, child"
*Child shakes head*
"Ape! this child is rottened to the core!"
*throws a match on the picture, child screams*
"Ape, you could handle it from here"
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08-05-2010, 04:45 PM
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#36
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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*get's the "open eye holdey thingy" *(with which to hold the child's eyes open)
*Puts on some Helsing*
*regularly puts eye drops in the eyes to keep them moist*
Sparkles wont save you now.
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08-05-2010, 05:34 PM
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#37
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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*Laughs evily*
"we should get a dummie that looks like Edwin and then stab him until she snaps out of it"
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08-05-2010, 06:01 PM
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#38
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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Perhaps we should explain to her that stalkers are never emo vampires.
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08-05-2010, 06:08 PM
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#39
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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Yeah or we could try Hypnosis
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08-05-2010, 06:13 PM
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#40
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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I dunno.. I liked the slightly clockwork orange-esqe thing we had going on there for a bit....
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08-05-2010, 06:28 PM
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#41
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 634
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Ok then scratch off hypnosis,
"let's take the child to the electric chair"
*grabs a hand full of the childs hair and drags her to the chair, child screams while being straped to the chair*
"Ape, on the count of three flick the switch on,
One
Two
Three!...
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08-05-2010, 07:33 PM
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#42
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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Hey... no one should get chaired for liking shitty fiction... otherwise I would have gotten it years ago.
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08-05-2010, 08:38 PM
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#43
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Bliss
Posts: 4,374
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OMG, why is it soooooooo important to let people know Twilight sucks. So it's another movie, similiar to other movies or they said some other fictional thing different from the other fictional thing. I'm tired and going to sleep.
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08-05-2010, 08:44 PM
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#44
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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That's the point ... it's not similar to other movies. It not only is a bad movie, but it makes a mockery of good movies that came before it ... an insult that CANNOT be left to stand!
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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08-05-2010, 10:31 PM
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#45
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: In your trash can
Posts: 2,594
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Heck I wish I could write a 'shitty' fiction novel like Twilight and sell 85 million copies and get paid $750,000 advance for three books... Where do I sign up? So she made her vampires different, so did LJ Smith, by giving them rings to walk in the sunlight. etc. etc. etc.
What will they think up next - academies that would be witches go to on magical trains at platform 9 and three quarters?
Catch - *shrug*
Ben - Omega man - that was good - Charlton heston was it?
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08-05-2010, 10:47 PM
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#46
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
Posts: 61
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fruitbat
Heck I wish I could write a 'shitty' fiction novel like Twilight and sell 85 million copies and get paid $750,000 advance for three books... Where do I sign up? So she made her vampires different, so did LJ Smith, by giving them rings to walk in the sunlight. etc. etc. etc.
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it's not that she made them different, it's the fact that she stripped away everything that makes a vampire vampire, the only thing they do have in common with vampires is immortality and blood drinking.
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08-05-2010, 10:56 PM
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#47
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: In your trash can
Posts: 2,594
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but there are some who are still nasty - the voltaire kill unsuspecting tourists, Victoria makes a vamp army.
Is it the venom/no coffins/can go out in daylight that is the dealbreaker? I'm curious about what it is you don't like about it, not just that the SM's vampires are stupid - and I'll go and look at the older threads when I get chance.
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08-05-2010, 11:44 PM
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#48
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Smexyville, Colorado
Posts: 2,424
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I dunno.. I think its the stalking, stupid drama and pedophilia that really get me.. they're portrayed like its ok... like a dude who's over a hundred has any business trying to bag a 16 year old nymphet....*sicky noises*
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08-05-2010, 11:49 PM
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#49
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 9,548
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This is so not special to Twilight but I do hate how vampires are now just sexy misunderstood souls, although I think Anne Rice is to blame for that trend, Meyer just made them even far more tame. When I was a kid vampires scared the SHIT out of me. I saw a still from the original Nosferatu movie in a book when I was like, 8, and I was afraid of the book itself ever since. That Simpsons episode where Mr.Burns was a vampire gave me nightmares, as did some really freaky short stories by Bruce Coville (one of them was titled Vampire For Hire, wonder if its still actually scary?), and I couldn't read Dracula before going to bed when I read it in junior high. But after that it seems like vampires just weren't scary, my sister loved them in the Twilight sort of way because of Anne Rice, which completely ruined it for me I think. I miss the good scare they gave.
And word on the stalking shit, and Mary Sue Bella, but its just that kind of lit I think.
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08-06-2010, 02:37 AM
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#50
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: In your trash can
Posts: 2,594
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AD - *nods*
The majority of vampire books directed at the YA audience are pretty much the same. Vampires have gone from icky looking people to gorgeous hunks/honeys.
Mary Sue Bella - that's a good one :-D
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