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Old 04-10-2009, 06:28 PM   #1
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100 Ways to get kiced out of Home Depot

Here we go, same rules as the last one, but now we're in Home Depot.

1. Draw a large white circle in the lumber section and sumo-wrestle/joust with the fork lifts.

2. Get a group of friends and divide into two teams. Each team builds a catapult and tries to lauch a washing machine the farthest.

3. Hide in the plants in the garden section and pretend to be a rambo.

4. Make two teams again, this time each team builds a wooden battle ship with wheels on the bottom. "Sail" around the store and lauch projectiles at the other ship until it becomes imobile. Then have a swash buckle fight with 2x4's (4x4's if you're over 6'3")

5. Build "The Wicker Man." (The new movie was alright, but the song by Iron Maiden was better, "Your time will come!")
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Old 04-10-2009, 06:51 PM   #2
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I can't believe I made a typo in the thread title. DAMN!!!
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:31 PM   #3
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6. Try out one of the display toilets.
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:39 PM   #4
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7. go to the tools section and start looking around and if no one comes to assist you on thier own ask for help and ask which saw would work best for hacking limbs off of dead bodies
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:43 PM   #5
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8. Air guitar "Master of Puppets" on a 2x4 and attempt to sue the store when you get splinters.
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:43 PM   #6
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9. ask where they keep the chloroform, ski masks, small towels (wash clothes), rubber gloves, rope, duct tape, and if they have a device to distort your voice when on the phone.
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:45 PM   #7
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10. ask them to make a key for you and when asked what key you want to copy reach for thier key belt and say, "which ever one of these will unlock the store at night"
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:47 PM   #8
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Quote:
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10. ask them to make a key for you and when asked what key you want to copy reach for thier key belt and say, "which ever one of these will unlock the store at night"
Did you know that the lights and heating system are remote controled from another store/HQ?
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Old 04-10-2009, 07:52 PM   #9
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11. Have sex with the thread cutting machine.
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Old 04-10-2009, 08:10 PM   #10
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12. Consecutively fill carts with as much wood as possible and strand them around the store for the employees to put away. When they catch on, begin a slow speed shopping cart chase.
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Old 04-11-2009, 12:12 AM   #11
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13. Find a female attendant, and get her to help you find things in the store. Then use as many construction-related sexual innuendos as possible. ("I need to screw hard, do you have a tool for that?" or "I have a lot of wood, do you know how to nail it?")

*Side note: My father is a contractor, and I used to work with him. I would be a master at this.
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Old 04-11-2009, 11:05 AM   #12
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14. Play Hide & Seek in the kitchen displays.

15. In the same displays, pretend that you have been lost for days. Say "water" in a desperate voice and start to cry when no water comes out of the sinks.
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Old 04-11-2009, 11:14 AM   #13
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16. Find a caulking gun and ask women if they like your caulk.

17. Start mixing and dumping cement with out any purpose what so ever. When asked what you are doing, try to run through the cement (I do not reccomend "quickrete" cement).

18. Bring a friend and use duct tape to restrain him. Pour concrete around his shoes and constantly mummble something about "sleepin' wid da fishes."
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Old 04-11-2009, 01:24 PM   #14
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19. Let a hoarde of hopelessly special children loose on the power tools. Award fifty points to the first child to draw blood from another.
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Old 04-11-2009, 01:56 PM   #15
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19. Let a hoarde of hopelessly special children loose on the power tools. Award fifty points to the first child to draw blood from another.
I think that is the most evil thing I have ever heard, you have my repect.

20. Play drinking games that some how involve power tools.

21. NAILGUN TAG!!!

22. Use a long board or PVC pipe to polevault over random objects.
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Old 04-11-2009, 02:19 PM   #16
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23. Film a porno in the store and get creative with the tools and materials available to you.

24. Have a funeral and try to entomb your loved one in a cinder block pyramid.
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Old 04-11-2009, 08:40 PM   #17
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25. Gather all the cactus plants and build a cactus lance. Then have one fountain that is the "Fountain of Youth". Pretend to be Ponce De Leon and threaten anyone with the cactus lance who comes near the fountain.
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Old 04-12-2009, 03:04 PM   #18
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26. Either shotput or hammertoss everything you see.
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Old 04-18-2009, 06:53 PM   #19
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27. Try to karate chop all of the lumber in half!
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Old 04-18-2009, 08:29 PM   #20
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28. Test out a chainsaw on the lumber display.

29. Drive a riding lawnmower through the store over to the lawn/garden section and drive over all the plants.
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:21 PM   #21
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30. try to drive the riding lawnmowers out side to the parking lot and on your way out the door try to piss off as many employees as possible so that you can then use your new found transportation as a way to out run them. when you get caught say you just wanted to test drive it
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:24 PM   #22
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31. Tie a dog bone over your sacreds, and chase after female workers screaming that you jack off to them everyday, and offer to let them suck your boner.

You may get fined for sexual harassment for this, you can get fined for SA for just about anything.
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:30 PM   #23
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32. ask where they keep the small children displays
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:33 PM   #24
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33. Get Silent bobs bat cape and a piece of rope and the like, set it up, aim for the hot big breasted cashier at the front and lift off!
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:37 PM   #25
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34. construct a giant penis out of wood and put a sign in front of it saying "acctual size" while you stand beside the sign
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