Top 5 Most Appalling Vegas Horror Movies
A number of Gothic.net staffers spent the week around New Year’s in Las Vegas. There was no Mayan apocalypse, but we got a little apocalyptic on our own. Besides staying up late, gambling, and drinking unusual mixed beverages, we also went to the DoubleDown to see some band I never heard of. The DoubleDown is this tiny little club, which seems to contain most of the Las Vegas dark club life, at least the portion which does not include domination upsells. I go to a club to hear cool gothic music and maybe dance a little bit, but not whatever. Anyway, one of the people we were with was talking about the first time they came to Vegas and didn’t know the area, so they reserved at an off-Strip motel. Apparently, it was very locals-only and the locals all seemed very zombie-like.
So, as we were off the Las Vegas Strip already for the night, we ended up driving around Las Vegas, looking for the most gross places we could find. At each one, we played a game where we tried to associate a horror movie with it. A plus of this activity, aside from deepening my already-excessive knowledge of horror movies, is that all my practice over at www.partycasino.com really paid off extra at the off-Strip places. Anyway, without further ado, here are the top most appalling horror movies set in Las Vegas:
Leprechaun 3
You know any straight-to-DVD release with a 3 in the title has to be quality entertainment. Little green killing machine Leprechaun is going to administer payback to the people at the Lucky Shamrock Casino. This movie is in the so-bad-it-is-good zone and I would stay at (or at least party and gamble at) the Lucky Shamrock, if it were a real place.
Resident Evil Extinction
Yeah, yeah, the plot might be a bit both repetitive and incoherent, but it has zombies and Mila Jovovich in great outfits. Resident Evil: Extinction is one horror flick which is very very very easy on the eyes.
Hostel III: Hangover in Vegas
I am not sure whether the third (and non-Eli Roth) movie in the Hostel series was actually subtitled Hangover in Vegas. A lot of people reported that it was when it first came out, but maybe the comedy Hangover movie people objected. When would those movies ever come up together though? The subtitle does not appear on the DVD packaging anyway. I would describe this movie, but Wikipedia has that covered, if you must know and can’t bear to watch. Pretty much, it is a Hostel movie. Only the victims did not have to pay for international airfare to be horribly tortured.
The Hangover
You wake up with no memory, missing a tooth, with somebody else’s baby and somebody else’s tiger, some dim connection with Mike Tyson, and having to see Zach Galifianakis IN HIS UNDERWEAR. Sounds like horror to me.
Vegas Vampires
Okay, Vegas seems like the perfect city for vampires. People are awake around the clock and there are lots of transients. The only good thing in the movie Vegas Vampires, however, is that Tiny Lister is actually given the opportunity to show off his acting chops and he is clearly really talented. I guess there are not a lot of roles for a posthuman-looking 6’5″ blue-eyed black guy. I mean, besides the supernatural prison guard kind of thing he is usually cast as. Other than that, the plot is terrible and much of the dialog is groan-worthy. Although they make much of Daniel Baldwin being in the movie, apparently the producers of Vegas Vampires couldn’t afford even the most economical of Baldwins for more than a few minutes. It is basically a cameo appearance, not a box cover one.
Vampire in Vegas
Yes, I know I’m using a non-USA boxcover to illustrate Vampire in Vegas, but it is better designed than the American one. The scariest thing about this vampire horror film is that its promotion seems designed to cause confusion with Vegas Vampires. Although Tony Todd was great as Candyman, I really doubt anyone confuses him with Tiny Lister, without the kind of excessive Photoshop attempted on the Vampire in Vegas posters. Basically, Vampire in Vegas wishes it were a better movie, like Vegas Vampires. The mind boggles. Oh, it is about some vamps who are allergic to the sun trying to do something about their affliction or something. It is all pretty murky.
I’m allergic to the sun, but I’m good with that.
Note: I did not forget Zombie Strippers! as that fine piece of cinema actually takes place in existential Sartre, Nebraska and not Nevada at all. Even though that would have been more logical. No doubt, we will also need to revisit this list when Zack Snyder’s Army of the Dead comes out. You know that is going to be all kinds of wretchedly bad.
Any other Vegas horror movies you feel should be included?
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Posted by Gothic.net
on Tuesday, January 8th, 2013. Filed under Headline, Horror, Movies.
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Tags: daniel baldwin, hangover, horror, hostel, las vegas, leprechaun, mila jovovich, resident evil, tiny lister, tony todd, top 10, vampire in vegas, vampires, vegas, vegas vampires, zach galifianakis, zombies
