wow i have to give you credit on that one matt

"At least second"... I'm stealin' third

why stop there? go for the home run

27. Eat some one's hair.

If I stop at third I can always so that "I tripped"

28. stash a bunch of items in your shirt walk past an employee an "accidentally" have them drop and then run quickly away

29. Scream, "Don't make me use the shrink ray, don't make me use the shrink ray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I'm out for tonight.

30. ask to taste test all the canned foods

31. Start throwing fists into everyone's faces.

32. Set the alarms on all of the mini-stereos to go off one after the other, on really loud rock stations.

33. Pretend that you live there, and that you own everything. [This is a good experiment to also see how long it actually takes Wal-Mart to throw someone out.]

viscus: Honestly, I don't think that would do much good, since all the stereos are usually blasting away at full volume regardless.

34. Take a box of condoms to the fitting room and ask to try them on.

35. If allowed (Wal Mart doesnt have the brightest employees) go out of the fittign room wearing jsut the condom and ask for opinions of its look.

36. Go to the pharmacy and ask if they have the goods. Then start asking all the pharmacy employees if they are wearing a wire.

37. Go to the bakery and ask them to bake all the frozen goods in your cart.

38. Ask the sporting goods guy where they keep the anti depressants while holding a gun you wanted to look at.

39. Grab a box of Vagisil and walk up to random women and say look honey it will stop the dripping.

40. Go the sporting good section and set up a tent and sleeping bad and just watch.

41. Get camo from the sporting goods section and then hide in a clothign rack and jump out randomly.

42. Hide in the clothing racks and yell pick me I would cover you jsut right, or keep looking tubby and such.

43. Go to the Coke display in the shape of a pirate ship climb in it and yell pirate things at people.

44. Go to the meat section ask for the butcher, when he comes out start yelling you son of a bitch why did you grind up chuck (while holding a container of ground chuck).

45. Talk to the lobster tank...Give a yes master... Then start yelling LOBSTER LIBERATION.

46. Go to the garden center and ask which flowers are best to put over a shallow grave to hide the smell

47. while in the garden center ask how much dirt is needed to fill a 6x6 hole containing a 6ft man.

48. While in the graden ask them which grill would be best for cooking a baby.

49. Go to the dryers and ask which ones best for drying a small child after a bath.

50. Do to the pesticides and ask which ones works best on pets.


Me and my friends have done jsut about every thing you can do to get kicked out of wal mart.

51. Get a group of friends together and have a real scavenger hunt (every one dresses in vulture costumes and tries to consume as muck meat as possible).

52. A room with a moose (it explains it's self).

53. Battling with pool noodles (I have been warned once).

54. Battling with mops (no warning, but I am sure it's the same).

Surprisingly as a kid rollerblading did not illicit a warning or getting kicked out, but things may well have changed, particularly my age.

I'm not sure if anyone has asked this but, why go in to Walmart in the first place?

So, what did you think of the "Nostril Speach?"

55. Give nostril speach to random people.

Because groceries at Kroger (if you know what that is) are more expensive.

Besides, not many stores sell Pokémon shirts for $5, even if it is a child's small and almost doesn't fit.

. . . "Nostril Speach"?

reread my intro, "The Witch Doctor"

What about groceries at the shop around the corner? Those tiny, run down places usually run by Asians.

I live in a college town where small grocery stores are unnecessary. The only two I know of is Fooks Foods (Asian) and Taj Mahal (Indian). Nice selection, but not convenient for my cereal needs.

Also, again, Wal-Mart is just cheaper. The health cereal (such as Kashi) is as expensive or cheaper than name brands such as Cheerios (my other love).

I can see how all these big chains can come in, and destroy little businesses. It's unfortunate. But, that's just how it is.

Lol why not. You can get steaks, shotguns shells, a haircut, dvds, and new tires in the same stop. Never mind the fact that wal mart is a corporate conglomerate that employees more people the United States armed forces does. Never the fact so many people have lost business because of them. Plus the employees are jsut to friendly. Please note the sarcasm. More then likely you can detect the sarcasm, I HATE WAL MARTS!!!!

I won't lie, I don't support Wal-Mart, but when you're a poor college student and it's the cheapest place around, it's all you can do.

Is your name Aaron, and do you live in Georgia?