Funerals
 

I searched and did not find a Funerals thread. Tha Duckman describing his collection of cigarette butts made me think about the past funerals I attended where smoking was the root cause. Then I began thinking of ALL the funerals I attended, so thought perhaps members would want a thread where they could post their recollections of funerals, graveyard services, what lead to the funeral, what they liked about it, hated about it, and perhaps even their own funeral arrangements.

I go first:

I have been to six funerals where smoking killed the deceased. Four where it was plain old age (in their 90's), one due to leukemia (my sister, many, many years ago, so you may spare me your condolences), two due to a car accident (both occupants of the same car were killed), two due to alcohol, two due to suicide, one due to organ failure in middle age, two due to violence (stabbing and gunshot), one due to heart attack at age 59 (the most recent I attended 2 months ago), and two due to cancer. Whew!

I want my corpse to be given to the necropheliacs. They're very segregated, and I don't think it's right. I like equal opportunities.

Since you would be dead and flaccid, that means you should be laid face down, as you would only be able to provide one kind of necrophilia activity. :D
Or would you state some kind of necro-preference in your last will and testament? :)

Not really. Way I see it, I'll be dead, so I wouldn't give a flying fuck either way.

Just about all of the ones I've attended were cancer or complications of cancer treatment-related. Only two exceptions being my great-grandma, who died of a bloodclot, and my best friend from high school who died in a car crash. I've never cried at a funeral. I just don't feel that secure showing such emotion in public.

one for stroke
two for altheimerz (sp?)
one for suicide
four auto accidents with a total of six people
and my aunt has fatal bone carncer that's back again, so she'll probebly be in in the next year

Let me count thy many ways I have been to and endured funerals...
One hand gone...
Two hands gone...
I ran out of hands!!!! Oh! Wait I have toes...
Not enough for three total...

I've only been to three.

Two of my grandparents, who died peacefully of old age, and an acquaintance at school who had an epileptic fit in his sleep and choked.

What really struck me was the conceivable difference in mood at the funerals. For those who died of old age they were mostly a celebration of life, while the teenager's was more about mourning a tragic loss.

I will elaborate on that more on the 'morrow, but no I must bid thee farewell and a goodnight.

I've only been to a couple. One for my grandmother, cancer, one for my half sister's mother, motorcycle crash, and that's it really, I've had more deaths occur, but there just weren't any funerals.

I've only been to two, and I can barely remember the first one. It was my dad's dad, Jorge. (Only its pronounced like, horhey, or somthing)

I think he died from a stroke..

The second one, was my god father. He died of leukemia. When I visited him in the hospital, he looked.. oh so different, it was almost frightening.

Looking back, I see the same thing, except not just teenagers, but even up to the 50's it seems that it is considered a loss.

That's because it's considered a waste of a life.

I've been to three; gran (about 70, breast cancer), cousin (4 years old, toxic shock) and grandad (about 85, heart failure). My gran & grandad were my mum's parents.

Personally I hate funerals. Not because of the sadness but because it's a huge load of un-necessary fuss. Lots of cash to be made in the funeral business, I tell ya.

Personally, I'd want to send off the deceased in a burning boat, viking style. Then afterwards, everyone would go off and party in memory of their life.

Okay I am up, sort of, to tell you off all the funerals I have been to.
1. My cousin - falling down the stairs, he was paralyzed from the neck down.
2. My grandma (dad's side) - old age
3. A friend of mine - car crash
4. Another friend of mine - over drinking
5. Yet another friend - OD on drugs
6. My grandpa (mom's side) - cancer
7. My other cousin - car crash
8. My adopted grandma - breast cancer
9. My mom's friend - old age
10. My mom's friends wife - lung cancer
11. My friend's brother - allergic reaction
& last but not least
12. At that time current boyfriend - kidney failure

I've been to two that I can recall. One was my old nannie who died of bone cancer and the other was of one of my good friends who died of a heart attack at age 28. It was partly due to his heavy smoking and lineage that he died that way.

I also had an uncle who died of lung cancer, and he smoked I think five packs a day regularly though I didn't attend his funeral.

Oh, I just remembered now that I attended another funeral. One of my grandfather's soldiers from WWII died of old age. Buried the usual way.

If I wasn't cremated yet I'd want my body to be seated on a big old chair while everyone partied around me. The party would only end once I start to stink of rot.

I've only been to one, and that was for some distant grand-aunt of mine... and as I attended when I was seven, I don't have much to add on the matter other than I thought it terribly boring. I have a huge family, but I'm separated from them by a thousand miles, and I don't know it well. If there are any more deaths (though everyone seems quite healthy), I may or may not attend. My stepfather, however, isn't doing so well... I might be attending his funeral within five years.

I think it'd feel strange to be at a suicide victim's funeral. I'd feel awkward.

In the last year, I went to three or four I think. I have seemed to average about that many since I was a freshman in high school. There is one coming up, that I will not be going to, but anyway. That's for the whine thread.

1) my 22-year-old cousin (interal bleeding from tubal pregnancy) when I was 4
2) my 11-year-old cousin (internal bleeding from car accident) when I was 9
3) my grandmother (various old age factors) when I was 19
4) my 53-year-old uncle (heart attack) when I was 23
5) my grandfather (various old age factors) last year when I was 23
^ Today would've been his 96th birthday. :(

did you know that if you mix up the letters in funeral, it spells 'real fun'?

Kinda kooky.

I want a green funeral.

Actually, that's pretty important to me. I'm 20, but all of my loved ones already know what I want done with my body when I die.

What is a green funeral? I hear reference to it, but am lost by not knowing what it is. Can someone tell me?

Wiki:
Basically, I don't want all those unnecessary chemicals pumped through my body. I want to rot naturally.

I went to my grandfather's funeral. He died of a heart attack. My grandmother was cremated and she requested that no service be held. So we didn't. My partner died of brain cancer. His funeral was in Missouri with his family. I didn't go. A close friend died from renal faliure and liver disease from alchoholism. His family held a Catholic service and wake. I attended it.

This is the cheeriest thread in the Universe !!!

When I die, I just want to be cremated, and my friends can have all my stuff. But God don't want me dead yet, man. I got more writing to write.

I've never heard of a 'Green Funeral.'

Are they a recent thing? Or has it been around for some time? Are the expenses any more or less compared to a 'traditional' funeral (cremation or burrial)?

Gawd...

In the last two years alone it seemed like at least one a month, but it wasn't that many.

My baby brother shot himself and lingered for 5 days (Don't do drugs, kids)- dying on the same day my garndfather succumbed to pneumonia. 2 funerals.

My neice was stillborn- saddest funeral I have ever been to

An ex-boyfriend died from being stabbed in the chest with a screwdriver- another funeral (He had three babies and was about to marry my old cheerleading friend).

I went to two funerals for local cops and one for a local Marine, all of whom were killed in the line of duty. I knew the Marine as an acquaintence, but I try to go whenever a cop is killed in the line of duty as a show of support for my friends in blue.

A coworker died of heart failure. At work. Talk about awkward. Funny funeral, though. He was a nut to the end.

A former co-worker died, lupus related, I think. Another funeral.

There were 4 or 5 more, but it was less being there for the deceased, and more being there for a friend of the deceased/being the driver for some who could not drive themselves.

So, I actually heard about it through Six Feet Under, the TV show... And I'm not really sure how cost-effective it is. It doesn't seem like it would be expensive-- I mean, you don't have any chemicals in you and you get buried in a cardboard box.

I don't know how many I've been to, but the first one was my mothers when I was five (don't be concerned, anyone. It was a while ago). The most recent was a friend's father who died of a stroke.

When I die, I want to be driven to a nice, out of the way cemetery in my own hearse (that I will own someday. Hah.), buried deathhawk up in my leather jacket, fishnets, and make-up in a coffin I build myself. Maybe in a masolium. I know it sounds cheesy, but it'd be cool. Then a future deathrocker will accidently stumble upon my coffin during a cemetery-party celebrating the aniversary of the opening of the BatCave, and open it, taking my leather jacket as the ultimate treasure and upon wearing it, it fuses to his skin turning him into a zombie and starts an outbreak. It's up to his friends to stop the zombies and get their friend back.
"Return of the Living Dead 6: Zombie-Rocker's Revenge" in theaters this summer.

Don't ask. Hahaha.

The last funeral that actually made me sad and teary eyed was the one for my cat, a good long while ago. Me and my family stood around, reminisced, said a few words and gave it a nice little burial. The cat died of pneumonia. =(

Been to a couple since (for people) and those I only went to for the free food.

I have never been to a funeral. I have had only 2 people sort of close to me die. And 4 pets have died.

My father did not think I had to go to my step-grandfather's because he was not blood related and he thought I was too young.

And my grandma who I was not very close to because she lived very far away died because of her health. Her heart was failing. She was very obese, and she smoked a lot. When I saw her last a few years ago she did a lot of smoking. My grandfather decided to have her cremated and he did not have a funeral or a memorial.

Actually, birth is the root cause of deaths. Let us rebel against this unwise act, my fellows. To arms in irritating, self-righteous crusade! Let us stop all from being born so that we may avert the death that always, literally always, follows it. It is the root cause of all human death, pain, and sorrow. Compared to it, cigarettes or booze are petty.
Let us smash this corrupt institution!

I love Six Feet Under.

That show helps my drive for wanting to become a mortician.

I've been to two, both when I was about 13 or 14, and both were for great grandparents on my Dad's side. My Great-Grandma died of old age/Alzheimer's, and my Great-Grandpa died of old age. They were both around 93 or 95 when they kicked, so they'd had a long life. They spent 6 months in Canada and 6 months in Texas every year up until they were about 88 or 90 or something. I was pretty bored at both funerals because I wasn't close to either of them.

As for my own funeral, I want a Viking funeral. I want a boat with the Viking style front on it. It can be as simple as a wooden dinghy with a cardboard thing on the front, but anyway. And I want coins on my eyes. I have a couple pennies saved just for the Ferryman. ;)

I want a Viking funeral, too :[ If not, throw my body out somewhere or cremate me. I simply don't want a burial. I abhor common burials. . .

If people insist on giving me a common burial, I want it to be in a heavily forested cemetery. One of those dark, dank ones with a mix of tall, fragrant evergreens and massive deciduous trees. The tombstones would ideally be old and mossy, some broken and falling over. Or right beside a really old, semi-ruined forest chapel. I love chapels in the middle of forests.
Maybe I'll sculpt my own tombstone when (if) I can do well enough in stone sculpture. No idea what I'd put on it... Maybe a harpy, or a person with dragon wings. They'd be holding a paintbrush, and/or a sculpture tool. If it was the harpy, it would be pinning a pallet to the block-part.
K, maybe I do have an idea of what I'd put on it...

My last funeral was my grandmoms. God, I miss her.
I want to be cremated and at the memorial service/funeral I want it to be a party with awesome goth/deathrock songs. I want people to celebrate my life, not just mourn the loss.

Just for cheek factor, I want people to play at least part of Flama Flama (Fire requiem by Nicholas Lens. Very weird, but definitely worth checking out). And Nightwish and Killing Joke and Gossamer. And others.

My first funeral was my uncle's, I believe I was 5 or 6 years old. He had a heart attack, and I loved him dearly... but I can't recall the funeral itself.

Then, my great grandmother, when I was 10. She had Alzheimer's and lived in an asylum, and thought I was her little girl (my aunt, actually). She was pretty scary due to dementia, and died of old age. The funeral as I recall it was boring and I got sunburnt, but I got to play in the graveyard XD.

More recently, in 2004, one of my best friends commited suicide. Oh boy did I cry on his funeral... on friday he went to my house and we watched the Nightmare Before Christmas together because he hadn't seen it, then played some videogames, and watched his Apocalyptica dvd. He killed himself on wednesday, august 9 (16 years old, his seventeenth birthday was on september 17).

Then, just last year, a 17 years old girl friend had a baby. The baby was born with intestinal problems, and died in about a month. I was sad for my friend, because she is basically a failure at life and her dream was to have a baby. It happened around july. The funeral was awful, the priest kept talking about stupid things that made the parents look as if their were guilty of the baby's death... That only made them feel worse.
She's already pregnant again.

And, november 11, 2006, my grandfather died. That basically destroyed whatever relationship existed between my father and his mother, and some of my uncles. The service was beautiful, a lot of people attended because my grandfather was an important man, and I just couldn't cry. I felt really sad, but no tears came.

That is awesome! I can hear the future deathrocker now, smiling as he says:
"heh! You like it? I stole it off a dead guy!"
:D

I don't remember how many funerals I have gone to, but I feel guilty in admitting that I have never been sad in them.
Oh, wait, there was one where I got sad; but it's because I said to myself that I should be sad. Once I felt the obligation was accomplished, I moved on.
Yeah yeah, I'm dead on the inside, that just makes me gothier than thou.;)

I've been to 3:

My cousin whoes liver was punctured all the way through by a metal post of some sort in a car crash. She left 2 small children behind. Her mom is sueing for custody.

My grandfather, whoes home I lived at half the time growing up.

My other grandfather, whom I didn't know very well and thought was creepy.

All three times multiple people were upset with me because I wasn't upset at all. Even my grandfather I grew up with - nothing. As a goth, I would assume my instinct would be to languish in the tragidy of it all, but I felt nothing. Death doesn't make me feel.

I think it's just too big to truely comprehend. It's too permanent. It's like feeling pain that the sun will eventually expand into a Red Giant, consuming the earth in a few billion years.

Maybe I'm just emotionally mutated.

At least you didn't laugh. I know it was really fucked up to laugh at the funerals I've been to, but at least I excused myself and made it to my car instead of busting out in the back of the congregation.

I don't exactly think you're dead on the inside. Perhaps you just realise not to waste your time with something that's out of your control and a natural part of life anyways. But I could be wrong. Tell me oh gothy one! :) Am I wrong?

Death- we ALL have it coming.

I've been to three.
My grandfather: died of cancer in his 80's, smoking related.
My brother: suicide when he was 23.
My best friends brother: OD when he was 21.

I went to the viewing of my best friends brother, but I never went and saw my brother in his casket. I couldn't bring myself to do it. But looking back I think I should have. Seeing him dead could possibly have made me come to terms with his death more quickly.

When I go to an open casket service and see the deceased, I realize I am only looking at a shell. I get a feeling of just knowing that the person I knew is not "in there", and what remains is what was cast off, like an empty chrysalis.

I don't really go to funerals. I've had several people die in my family, but I just can't bring myself to go to a funeral.
I think someone else said it, but I also want to rot. I don't want to be embalmed, I don't want to be clothed, unless it's pure cotton or something, and I don't want any fancy casket. I want to rot, and go back to the earth.