Ravings of a Sleepless Man
 

I made you a Venn Diagram.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...us/poemred.png

Best reply.

What the fuck? You're like a girl with festering oral herpes who calls me gay when I refuse a blowjob.

Is it just me or does the above post imply that Angelic Dissonance actually does have herpes?
Anyway, no inflammation of the genital region could possibility induce in me so great a delirium that I'd not only compose absolute fucking sewage, but post said sewage on the internet in order that others might waste their time reading it.

He's just blaming his idiocy for the past three days on a sickness.

Should we tell him that's four times more fucking stupid?

You act like the desiccated corpse of Ramses II has lurched out of its Sarcophagus to pick on you. I'm 21. I was your age when I joined this board, and never have I rendered an embarrassment that, in magnitude, even approaches a post one billion times more dignified and self-possessed than your most dignified and self-possessed post.

Let's be real, you're exaggerating just a pinch. We're both well aware that by no means do I 'spend my day' ripping on you. I happily dedicate a modicum of my spare time to ripping on whatever moron should be on hand because I treat doing so as a relaxing hobby, a means of letting off steam. It's like going to the shooting range, but for New Yorkers.

So had we just turned the other cheek to the gross insult that is this 'poem', you would have thrown an even bigger temper tantrum?

I have-- on these boards no less. You can find my poetry among the threads I've started.

I feel like that's a brazen lie, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you attended a high school where English teachers assigned original compositions of their own authorship that never included verbs or something.

But as far as I suspect, you totally have herpes.

You think "everyone" likes Twilight, you fucking call yourself a sensitive artist, you admitted you changed your political stance because it became 'too popular', and to add to that you fucking consider yourself a 'kid' AT AGE 18!!!


I am genuinely concerned about your life in the real world.

GothicusMaximus, your "Venn Diagram" IS funny; however, you guys are just BRUTAL. People are going to be afraid to post their works... If not here, where else can a fellow get away with posting poetry these days? Hardly anyone gives a damn about the genre any more.

Angelic, this poem is really rough (as you called it, "ravings"), but may I give you some constructive criticism to consider? #1 the format is extremely loose, #2 the ideas seem to skip about quickly and randomly making it's central meaning too cryptic, and #3 there is a bizarre mixture of formal, mysterious language and contemporary terms and slang. Any of these three can be utilized effectively, in theory, but using all of them at once is overwhelming.

Of course, you were just in the mood to pour out ideas; 'no problem. I think that you have some interesting ideas though. I'd like to see some of the ideas mentioned in this poem worked out in a more ordered, understandable way. Because of poetry's strange effect on a "receptive" reader/listener, it can be a powerful form of communication. Don't be discouraged ~ you're pretty gutsy to post "ravings" of any kind, especially on this site. If one has an interest in poetry, he can become skilled at it through a little study and practice. I hope to read more of your works.

Honestly, it's a long way too contrived to be proper "ravings".

If you want a point of reference for poetry that rambles on but is actually very very carefully thought out, I guess something like Rhapsody on a Windy Night is a good place to start.

Or Prufrock.

T.S. Eliot anyway.

Also - putting in the word "oh" makes you sound like a pompous wankpot.