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-   -   I Will Always Love You...RIP. (https://www.gothic.net/boards/showthread.php?t=22787)

Deth's Dream 06-15-2010 06:06 AM

I Will Always Love You...RIP.
 
my boyfriend died 6 months ago. Due to cardio arrest. and I am still mourning over him. He was the best guy I could have ever met. I miss him..so much. I hate life. I still dream abt him...according to my family, i wil sit up straight, red eyed in the middle of the night and sit there for minutes without speaking. They will call me and wave their hands infront of me..but no response. then i will sigh and lie back onto my pillow. Its weird. Its sad. I dont want to lose him forever. T.T any tips on how to forget him?

Queen Gothica 06-15-2010 06:30 AM

There is no real way to get over a loved ones death. The best way (as people tell you) is to forget and move on. To be honest, not many people can do it so easily. I've never experienced that loss, but I can tell you that even if he's gone, he's still in your memories and your heart. Never forget that and he'll always be with you

M.Valdemar 06-15-2010 11:10 PM

You have posted this because you are looking for... someone else's perspective?

Okay.

You probably do not want to forget him.

Don't even try to. Hang on to all those memories because, painful or not to remember, they are now a part of you.

There is no magic formula for moving on, or getting past - but you know this.

It's only a small thing, but focus on the things that are still in your life and matter in any way. Friends, family, work, it doesn't matter what it is - just focus on the day to day.

ape descendant 06-16-2010 02:50 PM

Its rough when some one who is very close to you dies. I hope that your family is kind and understanding about it, the healing process is far more difficult when your deep feelings of loss are scoffed at and ignored.

You will continue to have the dreams.... they do become less frequent, though.

Your heart will continue to ache and hurt for a while, but that fades a little bit as time goes on. After a while, you'll stop listening for his footsteps comming up the stairs, food will regain its flavor and it will be come possible/easier to smile and laugh again.

But things are going to suck quite acutely for a while. But its ok. Just remember that the void you feel in your heart is a testament to how much he meant to you. Sometimes it can take a few years to feel significantly better... and you will probably never be the way you were before he died.

You will heal, but there's no way to rush it. And if some one tells you to "just get over it" I recomend telling them to fuck off.

Daywalker 06-17-2010 04:12 PM

Allll boohoo he got the easy way out were all stuck here

ape descendant 06-20-2010 01:06 AM

Tie a red red red red red red ribbon.. don't be afraid...

Daywalker 06-20-2010 01:20 AM

People die Its part of life.

tears 06-21-2010 07:17 AM

im sooo sorry i know how does it feel like ..
ofcourse u will never forget him .. but trust me day after day it will be much easier to live .. TIME can heal alot of things .. so just give your self all the time you need .. it may took u long but im sure that you'll be better

Daywalker 06-23-2010 08:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tears (Post 622712)
im sooo sorry i know how does it feel like ..
ofcourse u will never forget him .. but trust me day after day it will be much easier to live .. TIME can heal alot of things .. so just give your self all the time you need .. it may took u long but im sure that you'll be better

Awwe that so nice come on LIFE + DEATH = US FUCKED FOREVER

Lady Sorrow 06-23-2010 08:22 AM

easy Daywalker, no need to be so cold about death (no pun intended there). we get it, you dont care, you accept it as part of life, as do i and, im sure, the rest of us here, but still. have bit of a heart. death is a hard thing to deal with.

Daywalker 06-23-2010 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lady Sorrow (Post 623010)
easy Daywalker, no need to be so cold about death (no pun intended there). we get it, you dont care, you accept it as part of life, as do i and, im sure, the rest of us here, but still. have bit of a heart. death is a hard thing to deal with.

No its not its your perception on death that makes it so heard. If you look at death as a terrible and horrible thing that is hard to deal with than it will be. But if you look at it as part of life or. A beautiful natural thing then it will be. This is self-evident by how other cultures deal with it. To some its a time to be happy. A time to remember an honor the ones that have past a way.

Lady Sorrow 06-23-2010 09:17 AM

yes, i belive that. i think when someone dies, they go to somplace better. that there ok where they are now. and death... it is beautiful. its rebirth, and a new begining. but i also belive you should still honor and respect others veiws, especially in the face of death.

Daywalker 06-23-2010 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lady Sorrow (Post 623045)
yes, i belive that. i think when someone dies, they go to somplace better. that there ok where they are now. and death... it is beautiful. its rebirth, and a new begining. but i also belive you should still honor and respect others veiws, especially in the face of death.

Very nicely put.

Lady Sorrow 06-24-2010 06:20 AM

thank you Daywalker, your to kind. :)

tears 06-25-2010 01:39 PM

How can you count death as a beautiful thing ..
i know life is rise and fall .. to have something u need to give up on something else
but HELLO !! we r humans we do have feelings .. we also get hurt

M.Valdemar 06-26-2010 12:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daywalker (Post 623101)
Very nicely put.

If I can walk in sunlight, can I keep my post count at 13 always?

Daywalker 06-26-2010 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M.Valdemar (Post 623487)
If I can walk in sunlight, can I keep my post count at 13 always?

What are you asking?

Ben Lahnger 06-26-2010 01:43 PM

For some reason, posts in Whining don't add to your post count. And Daywanker posts mostly in Whining.

He can't walk in daylight, as far as I know.

alchemie 06-26-2010 05:02 PM

So sorry for your loss but exactly why would you want to forget him if he was such a great guy?

Joker_in_the_Pack 06-27-2010 02:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ben Lahnger (Post 623531)
For some reason, posts in Whining don't add to your post count

Otherwise some people's post counts would have to be expressed in scientific notation.

Lady Sorrow 06-28-2010 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tears (Post 623428)
How can you count death as a beautiful thing ..
i know life is rise and fall .. to have something u need to give up on something else
but HELLO !! we r humans we do have feelings .. we also get hurt

because death is beauty. like i said, death is a rebirthing, and so it is life. all beauty is in life, and so beauty returns in death. yes it is painful, but it is beauty all the same.

Tam Li Hua 06-28-2010 06:39 AM

I know this has probably already been said, but I'll say it regardless.

You shouldn't try to forget him. If he had such an impact on your life, you should treasure those memories, not avoid them. Also, it's impossible; he was a big part of your life, so of course you're going to remember him, as you will any loved one in your life.

Allow yourself to grieve the loss of him, but don't aspire to forget him.

Tam Li Hua 06-28-2010 06:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lady Sorrow (Post 623743)
because death is beauty. like i said, death is a rebirthing, and so it is life. all beauty is in life, and so beauty returns in death. yes it is painful, but it is beauty all the same.

I can understand this. When my mom passed away, it was painful for me but I was also glad that she was finally in a place where she was no longer in pain. She had a hard go of it in life, and while I don't agree with the way she handled it [she was an alcoholic, and died from the disease], she wasn't a bad person.

I love and miss her greatly, but I definitely don't want to forget her.

Lady Sorrow 06-28-2010 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tam Li Hua (Post 623749)
I know this has probably already been said, but I'll say it regardless.

You shouldn't try to forget him. If he had such an impact on your life, you should treasure those memories, not avoid them. Also, it's impossible; he was a big part of your life, so of course you're going to remember him, as you will any loved one in your life.

Allow yourself to grieve the loss of him, but don't aspire to forget him.

i agree. i was walking in the cemetary maybe two nights ago and as i passed the tombstones, i thought, 'how many are forgotten?'. sadly it is as question with too many answers. the dead shouldnt be held on to so tightly that they cannot pass on, but they should be honored and remembered.

tears 06-28-2010 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lady Sorrow (Post 623743)
because death is beauty. like i said, death is a rebirthing, and so it is life. all beauty is in life, and so beauty returns in death. yes it is painful, but it is beauty all the same.

i see .. but i guess its hard for some people to look at it that way ..


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