3 Poems
 

Broken

I am broken
I am broken and I cannot be repaired.
My mind was shattered long ago
Along with my heart
I could never pick up the pieces
they're much too small
and I don't know where to start

Every part of me is broken
you can see the cracks in my face
in my eyes
and in my heart.


Nicotine

Nicotine stains the walls
Tobacco smoke fills the room
Just like my childhood with mother

This pain is my lullaby
The throbbing ache dulls me to sleep
It comforts me by letting me know its there
and reminds me that I am strong
For I have endured far worse pain than this
And i can endure more


What Color is your Misery?

What Color is your Misery?

From when I was young
it has crept upon me
A hissing, silent wave of blackness
Like a tidal wave
It slams into my life
Shaking and shattering everything
Without warning
Without provacation
It seeps through the doorways
Through the windows
It crawls over everything
Wrapping its tendrils over every part of my life
eating it
consuming it
consuming me
crawling all over my body and mind
Until I am blind and deaf to all but its screaming

I like nicotine the best. when I first read them they seemed very angsty,
I reread them and they feel like they are authentic, especially the tendrils. but they repeat the theme of pain and misery, I would not use the word heart at the end, it is very unique but at the end when you say heart, it seems to simple, i feel like the word heart has to be used wisely, but it is evocative of a sort of twisting pain or needles going into the heart.

needles going into the heart; I like that.

Thanks for posting your poems, LenorePoe. Each of these poems is unified in its message, and I appreciate that. Often, poems deal with too many ideas/feelings at once, and their messages consequently become too vague or convoluted to understand.

That said, "Broken" and "What Color is Your Misery?" seem a little simplistic to me as they are. For instance, in "What color is Your Misery?", "misery" is just too broad. You could make the poem more interesting by being more specific. What exactly is it that is causing the misery? Is it Loneliness? Addiction? Failure? Guilt? Rejection? Any of these can make someone miserable. Take that specific feeling and describe it as a physical thing like the creeping, black wave. Use as much symbolism as you like so long as the language describes both the feeling and the thing that symbolizes it. Use nothing that does not describe both at once.

At first, I thought that in "Nicotine", the writer relied upon nicotine as an emotional crutch ~ a sort of substitute for something that she was denied as a child. However, reading it again, I think that you simply meant that the pain itself has become the lullaby that lulls (I don't think that you mean "dulls") her to sleep. Therefore, the smoke and walls simply remind her of her painful memories. If you could combine the two stanzas together through their content more directly, this poem would be better.