Dried up and dead to the world....
 

Do you know what its like to be dried up and dead inside?
To know that there's no life inside of you?
To know that anything worthwhile is borrowed
In the end no credit is for you?
Is it still worth it to just go for it
To put in all of the effort of teaching, clothing, feeding,
a world that is not for you ultimately?

Fuck... I need thoughts.

hugs and prayers and chocolate or coffee or other semi-healthy comforting vices
:)
I really don't know what to say, but I've been almost exactly there, and I hope you feel better soon!

But it is: everything you do has some impact on the universe. Yes we are small, miniscule beings in this glorious multi-verse, but even a hydrogen atom affects time and space. And in the macro scale of things, you, AD, can take credit that you have influenced me, and many others who have read your posts.



Ultimately it is for the human race, it is for future generations, so yes it is worth it! Would you say that it makes no difference to my grandson's future, if I did not contribute to it? What if I gave up and didn't bother to teach, clothe, feed, and even play with and protect him, whose future benefit does not help me, does nothing for my credit? Yet, because him and I are connected through time, and through DNA, and through the generation leaping knowledge base of mankind, he and his generation will benefit, if only a smidgen, from my efforts.

We all as individuals must die, but the race goes on.

We are each given tests and trials in life to get through, that takes us from one place to another, that changes us, alters our perspective on the world around us.

We are only given what we can deal with and we can lift our heads up to the heavens and say enough.

Move onward and upward towards the light.

**hugs** HTH

You do need thoughts.

Buy some coke.

Thanks every one... :) I do feel better.

You need a vacation.

I read this as "you need a vicodin"

I agree with Jack. :)

I think most of us agree with Jack...

Well, only if you want a temporary fix that leaves you feeling worse off and broker than before you did it.

As far as band-aids go, coke has a spectacular euphoric effect in the short term, but it doesn't do jack to fix your problems and typically exacerbates them at some point.

But everybody's always looking for the easy way out.

Try getting slightly wasted and crying. Mmm, getting negative emotions to the surface can be a great exercise.

Catch, that is possibly the sweetest and most relevant thing I've ever seen you post. I would hug you if I could.

*skips into the room, throws her arms around AD in a big hug*

Driving fast with loud music always makes me feel better. Usually it happens when I reach about 140km/hr. (not endorsing speeding)

Of course there's always the endorphins from physical exercise ;)

I'll fly over to Colorado and we can go shopping or I'll do something crazy that will make you laugh at me and then you'll be really glad you can disown me or something ;)

Mostly, I got out of that sort of mood when I learned that wallowing in it is the worst thing you can possibly do. I know that when you're depressed thats way easier said than done, but its worth learning not to pick at your scabs and not letting it get you down.

Having a good day spent with friends also is always a cure for the blues.

Sure or enjoying the fact that other people are also miserable like being part of a community.

No one ever dies... we'll all just come back to life...

So THAT is where zombies come from!

Seconded...

:o) Sometimes I think to myself that I'm actualy dead and that my death will be my life... That helps me when I feel low.... and why not after all... ;o)

Eh... I've had times when seeing friends just made me feel more of a miserable shit, but that was usually when I was just emotionally and people-y exhausted, and being a miserable shit in general.
I do try not to indulge in such thoughts anymore, though. They still occur, but I tend to distance myself from them and let them pass, rather than purposefully cultivating them.

blow shit up. :) work on your pyrotechnic skills. works for me (when i can practice)

One thing I've found lifts my spirits a bit is to rip up a flyer into 1x1" chunks, scatter them on the floor, and then take all attachments off the vacuum so it's just the metal hose, and then vacuum them up. They make a funny noise.

Foomp Foomp Foomp Foomp

That would REALLY help. I've done something similar just doing chores. XD

Well, this would be more like creating chores to do, but in a more amusing manner than usual.

I agree, though, that a good cleaning of the apartment makes me feel better. I'd usually rather do art, though.