Psa.
 

Dear kids/adults who think there is nothing left/life is awful/no one cares,

Sometimes, life is incredible. It can be easy and simple and lovely and fantastic. There have been times I thought the only reason I was alive was because I hadn't yet died. Honestly, though, I'm happier now than I've ever been. Every day is better than the last. Even if it's not "a good day," it's MY day. Every success and every failure belongs to me, and that is the best feeling in the world.

In the end, you can choose to win. You can choose to live however you want. In the end, you can get the girl, you can run until you can't anymore, you can look into the faces of the people who were awful to you and tell them they're gonna be ok, and you can be an honest person.

This how I feel everyday!
That is everyday as long as I keep taking my Lexapro.

Seriously, though, tell the people. Things can be wonderful.

I do Ophie, I do. The point of my response though was serious too:
some people, although they intellectually know what you are saying is true, cannot help their emotional feelings due to brain chemistry.

But your PSA is helpful because your kind of enthusiasm for life (I almost said euthanasia lulz) is very contagious. Keep at it sugar!

I like this PSA!

Fruedian slip, HP? ;)

Nice message and very true.

I wish I knew how that feels. I'm too much of a hateful prick to be nice, even for a whole day.

And yet you rescued a woman from a wrecked vehicle. You're really a nice guy aren't you, Jack? A hateful prick wouldn't have done anything.

^I don't mean to presume any familiarity, but from what I've read of your posts you don't seem like a dick. We often see ourselves in a more negative light than that in which others see us.

That's why we love you and I imagine you're tall. :D

It doesn't have a lot to do with nice, per se. Just happy.

Well, at least you're honest. Er ... some of the time.

Lexapro: Better than Jesus.

Also: yeah. Life kicks ass. Mine has gotten steadily more awesome every year since middle school. People constantly bitch about how hard it is to "be an adult" and "Be in the real world", the real world is SO much better than school, even college.

I had a crappy time throughout most of my schooling, but once you break out of that, you realize that hey, you can pretty much do anything so long as you plan and work for it. So yeah, follow your dreams and all that happy horse shit. As corny as it sounds, things have a way of working out if you put yourself out there and you're willing to work and plan for what you want.

The best advice I've ever received is "If you want to do something crazy, do it" climb a mountain, swim the English Channel, join the peace corps, write your novel. The time you spend running around being awesome will feel amazing and do more for you professionally than your college degree.

This I agree with completely!

People spend so much of their lives sitting around just worrying about doing something instead of just doing it. Get out, live your life and enjoy it while it's good.

Yeah, everyone is so incredibly happy lately. It is so spontaneous and wonderous.

I see what you mean. It's just that I tend to alienate people I like by being a twat most of the time. Being a twat and doing what I please makes me happy. Alienating friends does not. So in effect it balances itself out and I feel mediocre most of the time.

What about depression as a medical condition...? You are aware that being chronically depressed for too long a time(especially at an early age, I imagine) can rewire the brain, right?

Sometimes I wonder if no matter how great life gets, I might still have to wonder off at night and have mood swings.

I don't want to take medicine for it. Not if I don't have to. I don't even think I have insurance, anyway.

But really, life now sucks and I am completely justified in hating at this point in time. This is rock bottom.

I know it will get better.... but just, what if my brain refuses to acknowledge that fact? How am I going to know for sure that I can leave all this behind me...?

I haven't taken meds for depression in about 4 years(give or take a few months). It is very hard at firt, but it does get better. I still have mood swings, but life no longer seems like it would be better off without me in it. It helps if you have someone to talk to when you start feeling like you're sliding down that spiral. I realize from personal experience that reaching out is normally the last thing we want to do once we have hit that slump, but it is possible to work through it.

Thank you so much for that. It seems like stuff we should already know, but it often escapes attention. Especially when some people reach out for help, and are reacted to with criticism... It happens.

I really appreciate your support.

Thing is, I know the world would be missing a lot if I died... I realize how many things I am capable of, and how many things I hope to accomplish. I have verifiable evidence of my impact. But, in my present situation, it seems like I have little to no one to reach out to. I sometimes go hungry, and I live in an old trailer with people who would fit in with Early Cuyler's family.

It's been really difficult to find a job, too... and there's just a lot to deal with.

I can walk down the street, and look at a random house... There's bullet holes in that house.

I know there are people worse off.

THAT PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF. IT'S A FUCKING TRAVESTY THAT ANYONE SHOULD HAVE TO SUFFER MORE THAN I DO, MUCH LESS AS MUCH AS I DO.

WHAT THE FUCK, AMERICA!?

Yes, all the adults in America fuck at some time.

Burpy post is funny. Post more, Bexxle!

I have NO answers..,

But I AM listening man,

AD just remember that you can rewire your brain again. People used to think that our brain didn't really change much other than to slowly decay but they were wrong, it is actually a remarkably resilient organ, that can overcome tremendous odds, as long as you have the willpower and the patience necessary.