OMFG! Are these guys for REAL?
 

Today, my friend emailed me this site about how to tell if your child is a Goth.

I can't tell if these people are for real or not.

Here is a list of how you can tell:

It's from this website:

http://landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=125

*******************************************
If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may
have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure
and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to
participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds
into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek
immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental
guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the
following are applicable to your child:

1-Frequently wears black clothing.
2-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
3-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.
4-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include:
reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other
Satanic worshipping symbols.
5-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
6-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music.
(Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against
the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
7-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak
eccentrically.
8-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the
Bible, prayer, church or sports.
9-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult,
witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
10-Takes drugs.
11-Drinks alcohol.
12-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
13-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.
(This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God
and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local
mental health center.)
14-Complains of boredom.
15-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
16-Is excessively awake during the night.
17-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to
vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
18-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
19-Spends large amounts of time alone.
20-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child
may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)
21-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an
adult.
22-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders
are but a few examples of this.
23-Misbehaves at school.
24-Misbehaves at home.
25-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of
this.
26-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires
believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and
should be stopped immediately.)
27-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources.
(Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
28-Plays videos games that contains violence or are of a role-playing
nature.
29-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the
computer.
30-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
31-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
32-Expresses an interest in sex.
33-Masturbates.
34-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
35-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
36-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various
phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
37-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene
immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it.
If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental
health center.
************************************************'


Do you guys those wack jobs are for real? If so. it's the funniest thing I have ever read.

Trampy

Yeah, and if you hade read a bit more on this forum, you would have found out that this tread has been done before...

But still, I got 27 out of 37

13-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.
(This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God
and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local
mental health center.)
Cutting oneself releases endorfins, distracting the body from any type of pain.

As for how I scored, I lost count. But you know a lot of it doesn't pertain to me as I am a Wiccan, not Christian. I turned away from that a couple years ago.

Well, if numbers 27,28 and 29 are true then that makes around half the world's population gothic. Sounds a bit like the GodHatesGoths website to me...written by idiots...

Sweetie I must point out that this same exact list is already somewhere else on this site.

It's a satirical website...it's supposed to be funny.

But we can complain because this is his/her only post.

HAHAHA!!! I posted this link over 6 months ago here. No, they are not real. the site is dedicated to makeing fun of christians.

...I keep my mouth shut on that remark...

This has to be a joke. Philosophy is a dangerous cult?! WTF?!

I agree, I've really been pissed reading all this bullshit denouncing it. But even if it IS a joke, they shouldn't think they have a right to make shit like that. Fucking Baptists.

Fucking goths.

jEEzus. Why'd ya say that? If you're baptist I'm sorry I offended you but there's no need insult something I am. God...

You take too seriously your 'gothiness' and have completely missed Pyre's point.

What was her 'point?'

The point was one of entitlement and proscription. In a free country, anyone has the right to make whatever they choose within the bounds of the law. You have the right to think it is shite, but not the right to say what they theoretically *should* do.

That is little different than Fred Phelps saying that (derogatory term for homosexuals) should curl up and die. He can say it. It is his opinion and in the US and kansas, his state, while it is considered an ignorant opinion, he is still free to express it.

And we are free to ignore it.

So ignore it.

Yeah, as mentioned before, that is just a parody. I found it on 6/6/06, ironically...

Ah, I see. Everyone has the right for their opinion despite it's stupid nature.

That is exactly right. As you have a right to your opinion, despite what others may think. Amazing concept, is it not?

I understand. I admit, I do take my gothness seriously. That's because I love the style, subculture, asesthic, fashion, etc. and I wish not to loose it.

I don't think any of us would be here if we didn't like what makes goth, well, goth. Just don't be afraid to laugh at yourself a little. :D There is nothing wrong with it.

That is HILARIOUS.

"I can insult a whole group of people, based on stereotypes, but if someone does that to me, I'm going to get offended."

Hypocrite much?

So, just to reiterate: Baptists didn't write that, but based on that, insulting Baptists is entirely ok. Insulting goths, however, is NOT ok, mostly because Vyvian Blackthorne takes goth "seriously". And apparently religious people who take their religion seriously matter less than Vyvian taking wearing black seriously.

I know, I'm such a hypocrite, aren't I? I'm laughing at myself now.

The first step to resolving a personal issue is realising it's there. And then doing nothing about it just to piss people off.

Ba! Ha ha ha hahee hee hee hee!

F&*&ING REDNECKS DOWN THE STREET!!!


F&8*** parked their shit on my grass again! UGH!!!

(sorry, I feel punchy this morning)

I just think it is so crazy how some stupid redneck or whatever makes up some weirdo website just to piss off "goths" or whatever as they sit back and watch all of these "goth" folks get all huffy over his/her website. Looks like they did their job, eh?