For the Newbies!! Yes, that means You!
 

So you are new here and you wanna get your cherry popped? What’s the best way to go about it? Well, you could try to be yourself, and if that gets you flamed…slit your fucking wrist and call it a day.

We promise to love you in the morning.

A n00b should know a few things before starting out, though, and here are those things.

Using L33t speak will cause strangers to appear at your door with incendiary devices, and you will be flamed. And trust me, there ain’t no Colonel Sanders Original Recipe, it’s all extra fucking crispy.

Do not make your own thread. First, get a goddamn clue and see if there is one already made that consists of the gist of your *sic* original thought, and do yourself a flame retardant favor, and post your idea/thought/epiphany/brainfart there. Introductions are nice, and we welcome them. That’s why we have a perpetual thread for that very reason. It’s is called Introduce Your Self Here, and you can find it in the General section.

Introductions are nice, and we welcome them.

That’s why we have a perpetual forum for that very reason.

It’s called The Introduction Forum.

Please ONLY Introduce yourself in the Introduction Forum.

Do not introduce yourself in the Literature section, the Movies and Games section, the Political Section, the Music section, the Whining Section, or the Fashion section. Do not make your own thread in any of those sections introducing yourself. Just use one brain cell, and the one thread that’s been created for you to introduce yourself.

Mmmkay?

Now, let’s cover some basics. You are probably wondering what Goth is, and want to ask others if they are as Goth as you? Well, no one is as Goth as you, so that’s a horse you’ll just have to fuck yourself. Yes, YOU are the GOTHEST of the GOTH, and that’s why after making your first post you’ll have a little tag that proclaims to the world that you are a Baby Goth.


On Writing, there are some really good books out there that teach you the fundamentals (if you slept through grade school) of writing, and I suggest picking up at least one of those up and reading the preface before posting your original work. We all, all of us, love a good yarn (especially of the macabre flavor) and really appreciate it when correct grammar and punctuation is used.

It’s. Not. That. Fucking. Hard. Really.

DO NOT harass, stalk, or otherwise annoy any of the other posters.

If you feel you have the right to make an ass of yourself, we have the right to make fun of you.

If you want to whine about how miserable your life is, there is a section just for that. It's called, amazingly enough, "Whining". If the reason you're whining is bullshit, though, we, again, reserve the right to make fun of you.

If you want to plug your new website, or the Goth ****** dresses you are selling then there is a section just for that. It's called "Shill".

Keep it there, please.

Logic! What a concept!

We have a place for your poetry and writing. It's in the "Literature" section. Yes, it was another brilliant stroke of logic, wasn't it?

If you think Manson is God and wish to talk about how Goth he is, we have a section for that. It's called MUSIC! If you are in a band,know someone who is in a band, or live near someone that thought about playing in a band once, THIS is your forum!


If you play World of Warcraft until your eyes bleed or want to argue about who makes the SICKEST exploitation films, VOILA a section for that as well. It is T.V, MOVIES and GAMES!

Finally, If you want to explore all of the Goth Gothiness that Hot Topic has to offer, please do so. In the FASHION forum!


Beyond that, Welcome to Hell and we hope you enjoy the show!

You forgot to mention that if they wanna whine about how the president's ruining their life, brainwashing them via tv commercials or is the reason they can't get a date, there's a forum called

Duh Duh DUH!!!!!

Politics

Just be able to back your shit up with facts or be able to debate intelligably or you'll become that icky stuff you find in fireplaces.

Once more for any ASSCLOWNS that can't get it through their heads:Introduce yourself in the "Introduce Yourself >HERE< " thread!!!

Do not send private messages to people you don't know,especailly if it's only to say,"Hi! I'm new!",follow the rules and you-too can live life with an uncharred ass!

What is L33t speak ?

Once more for the ASSCLOWNS!!!

ha
 

haha emptypurplestars i remember how wonderful your rants were... keep going!

She can't dear. She been banned.

Yep, she's not around these parts any more. :(

But the original post is still valid, methinks...
¬.¬

Well, yes. It's just a great pity that many of our newer members don't actually read these things.
(I'm aware I'm a newer member compared to the lost and lamented, but I do try to keep a minimum of decorum).
Perhaps added to the thread could be some little hint along the lines of 'reading this section and proceeding to act in the prohibited manners WILL cause unpleasantness- be ye here warned'?

hi, everyone
 

I am new here. Don't bite... unless you are into that sort of thing.

Who are these people? :p

Greetings all. At just 50 I'm an eldergoth and I've been a member of a couple of other sites similar to this one but nowhere near as impressive I must say. I'm an Australian, an author and a poet. I write in a variety of genres and I will post some of my work. However, I'm mainly here to meet other darkly inclined and broad minded people. I'm told I have a great general knowledge and I'm totally open and honest so don't hesitate to chat.

For the Newbies Yes that means You
 

Yes, you can buy the license. I just haul ammo there now. Saves the 8 sales tax and makes sure I only leave lead in IL not much cash

For the Newbies Yes that means You
 

No worries, I understand. It has a lot of issues but for a hour long intro its not bad. For someone that has no background its a start in the right direction.
Pikey