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< Would deliver the requested kick, but < is loathe to knock anyone into a pile of feces, even though ^ is probably used to the presence of manure. < is going to pass the burden of motivating ^ onto v, or, better yet, hope that v changes the subject of conversation to something other than poop.
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"I saw Judas Iscariot, carryin' John Wilkes Boothe." - Tom Waits
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