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Sub in the room and dom in the world describes me to a T.
As far as AEA- I stopped requesting it when I realised that most people either get SUPER freaked out by it or don't know how to not go too far. It's definitely an art.
As far as the cutting goes- it could be a symptom/release of depression, but at the same time it could very well be just bloodlust.
For me- it's definitely a bloodlust and nothing remotely near any sign of depression.
From depression to the emotional -v- physical aspects....
Personally, I think I prefer to be a sub in the bedroom as a sort of stress release from always having to be in actual control of everything in the real world. It's a strange emo/phys relationship.
I've never quite understood the satisfaction one gets from being emotionally subjugated. Everyone I've asked to explain it to me, can't. I much prefer the tangible proof of destruction.
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