[Apathy's_Child]

There's something I like about this poem. I think the repetition works well with the image of the mirror. I even like the contradiction, the inverse meanings. I'd base the whole poem around the mirror. In fact I'd call it The Mirror if I were you.

If there's one criticism, I'd say the repetition and mirror image probably makes it sound more interesting than it really is when you analyse it. But still, enough command of language to do this (unless it was an accidental fluke - I'd like to see more of your stuff so I can decide, and will keep an eye out for it) is more than most people around here can manage so kudos for that. Interesting. I'd change the line "I can't touch you" as it's too obvious and the meaning can be inferred from the rest of the poem anyway but other than that I kind of like the way it sounds.