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It's not awful, but my advise is drop the rhyme. Rhyme breeds cliche, and cliche is a fault which a lot of the imagery in this poem succumbs to.
To be brutally honest, I hated it, but it's not without potential.
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All pleasure is relief from tension. - William S. Burroughs
Witches have no wit, said the magician who was weak.
Hula, hula, said the witches. - Norman Mailer
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