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I know how that is, my father stayed with my mother to protect his children from her "wrath" I guess you could say. She wasn't physically abusive, but she was mentally and emotionally. She still is, I have just learned to basically ignore everything that's stupid that comes out of her mouth.
He still sided with her on most things, I found out after he passed away that he covered up a lot of what she did. Taking most of the problems on himself.
We build the walls no matter the situation I think, I built quite a few in the last few years, only to finally let a few down and was shown why I had them so thick.
The fact you notice the way she is means you won't turn out like her, she probably doesn't even realize she's that way, or if they do they deny it and you're the one at fault.
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