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Thank you very much Apathy. I'm glad to finally get a comment from you, and I appreciate your criticism of my poem. You're right; my style itself is blatantly anachronistic and will consequently repel some people immediately.
However, the content doesn't necessarily "have nothing to do with our reality" in my opinion. You probably just read it once, and that's completely fine. However, this poem has a second layer of meaning beyond the faerytale that I've explained below in this post. The question is: will people see what it is that I'm really trying to say, or will it come off as a buch of stuffy nonsense? I love works of literature that have multiple layers of meaning as long as they're not too cryptic. This story itself is on the surface archaic as you suggest (I've tried to avoid making it too cliche but still read like a classic faery tale), but I think that the underlying themes and message of the poem could be applicable to many people, even today.
As for my dated writing style, some may appreciate it for its nostalgia (I hope). I know it's not at all in style, but is "rigid" poetry such a bad thing? As an extra limitation, stubborn rigidity in poetry is probably more time-consuming to compose in the long run, but such a poem does have a unique sound that makes it stand out in an era wherein art tends to be quite loose and spontaneous.
For anyone who is curious about what this poem's message is: Many moral and symbolic themes can be found within this poem, but there is one that is paramount. Like so many classical works which I love, this poem contains a Biblical message. It's actually an allegory of a human being's struggle through the "sore travail" known as "life". Darkling (whose name might suggest one who is blind) finds herself in an imperfect, broken world and is tempted by the Devil to give in to bitterness and revenge (sin). The hooded messenger who she meets along the road toward damnation is an angel reminding Darkling that she is on the path of destruction but that the Prince of the land (symbolizing God ~ notice that the pronouns which refer to Him are always capitalized; this is a pretty good hint at Who The Prince is supposed to represent, I think) knows her suffering and seeks to take her to paradise with him if she will turn from her present path.
I have no way to know how many people this kind of thing will actually appeal to yet, but thank you very much for your insights. I've definitely got some useful feedback so far. Please comment on any of my contributions whenever you want to.
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