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Thank you so much for the response ceb, a lot of very good advice. I can't say I agree about turning this into a novel though...I didn't intend for it to have an extremely deep plot, and I can't say I see the potential that you do for it to be developed further. I'm interested in publishing eventually, but I thought this story would be better to use as a learning experience.
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"An orphan's curse would drag to hell
A spirit from on high ;
But oh ! more horrible than that
Is the curse in a dead man's eye !
Seven days, seven nights, I saw that curse,
And yet I could not die."
-The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
by Samuel Taylor Coleridge
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