[cannibalnuns]

Note: I am sure we all can relate this to experiences in general we have came endured. A phone call, letter, visit, e-mail and instant message- these things that sometimes bring back such feelings. More so when someone you give so much is the one who does so.

Oh how elegant some can be with words, when the last radiant resplendence of joy leaves them. Then suddenly you become their number one, their emotional tampon and a large part of their life. They pick up the scraps of what relationship you had and form a collage of memories to bring you back under their blackened wings. Though it is already in shambles and only parts remain. Nothing that was once a full picture is what it was. It is simply a make-shift act of desperation- a patchwork job. You know that, one last attempt to recover a fumble near the goal line.

Of course they fail to realize that they were never there for you, you were opportune when they wished to have someone who listened or to love them. These are the, moochers, takers, abusers, liars, cheaters, gluttons and emotional fiends. They are only bags of flesh, with no real emotion and care nor any consideration. They only feel for themselves, that is why they need people like you and I.

A mosquito would suit the like better, as they –do- enjoy sucking away as much of you as they can. They are so small and have such a capacity to drain others; they creep around from person to person taking what they want. I find the small creature a spitting image of these caliber cretins. They grow bigger when they take away something, as they can’t get it from their own resources or self. On another note nobody likes an insect that harbors disease, which it spreads indiscriminately. From one person to the next, taking away what they can without being swatted. And infecting the next person with the same feeling I now share.

Little mosquito, sooner or later you will land on the wrong arm of someone who is far more clever than you are.

You have a mountain of emotions to stand triumphant on, though gradually you forget that your triumphs over ones heart would begin to rot near the bottom and works its way up. We can spread our own diseases as well..

It looks to as if the foundation is about to crumble, I will be there, watching like “God”, whichever deity you believe in. Others will also be there; I am not the only soul. Did you forget such wrongful behavior turns a beating healthy heart black?

I wonder what one in particular will have to say on the long trip down from grace. I am sure I am not the only one who will wonder. Dear souls, what acts of desperation will you try to impose upon us?

“You see those going down you saw while going up. And others built the mountain you now claim. Remember that and know you will see me on your decent from your high horse. But will I take the time to listen when I have been made the fool one to many times?”

All stemmed from their own ignorant bliss that light which banished you from their plastic world. I relish the way; the shadows return with the fading light, they look to those shadows. You were a mere shadow in their life afterall. A shadow they ignored while their world was bright. The selfish wants and thoughtlessness, which made that very, light banishing you from their plastic kingdom.

I relish the way; the shadows return with the fading light and they look to the shadows. The people they once gained from, now only specters thus in essence a shadow of their formal selves.

And the crocodile smile emerges like an evangelist asking you for money when they have nothing to offer worth writing the check for. Then that silver tongue speaks dripping with the sweetest of nectar, in a vain attempt to tempt you into pollinating, so their emotions can sustain new life. Do you think it will work as you intend it to?

“All those nights I listened to your mindless babble about your dead beat boyfriend and all the sympathy and care I gave to you. Did you forget it all so easily and so soon? “

Whispering sweet words we (the foolish and trusting) once found so appealing, though now they make us only colder. The tone of those candy-coated words; so clever that even Loki might become confused by them.

I wanted to thank you all who have touched my life. I wanted to thank you for touching others lives who relate to what I just stated. We all thank you for making us stronger and reminding us how emotions (that make one forget common sense) should not be shared so openly. You taught us the pleasure and importance of being cynical. You taught us how to ignore others like you and to see through such facades. You made us realize how human we are and reminded us that we still actually feel pain. We want to thank you.

I am neither Jesus Christ nor a patron Saint; I am guilty of this too. But at least I do feel regret and I at least make it an effort not to use people. Sometimes we fuck up, we all do at some point. We all forget some people on a daily basis, but that is not the same thing. It is not breaking a heart or finding them convenient several months or year down the road. When they come back only because, you had the good stuff they recently lost. Only after they lost something they felt at the time was better than what you had, do they come back.

I end with this… “Welcome back, is it the same? Smelly but now old and lame. Did you ever think to miss me? Here's my ass, come on and kiss me." - GWAR

End Rant.