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01-11-2009, 08:36 PM
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#1
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 205
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79 percent of Americans missing the point entirely.
Quote:
WASHINGTON, DC—According to a Georgetown University study released Tuesday, 79 percent of Americans are missing the point entirely with regard to such wide-ranging topics as politics, consumerism, taxes, entertainment, fashion, and professional wrestling.
"From the overweight housewife who eats bag after bag of reduced-fat Ruffles, to the school board that bans Huckleberry Finn for using the word '******,' to the Manhattan stockbroker who uses recycled-paper checks to pay for gas for his behemoth SUV, the tendency of Americans to really just not get it transcends all boundaries of class, color, religion, sexual orientation, and political persuasion," said Dr. Ronald Shaw of Georgetown's Center For American Studies.
Polling nearly 8,000 Americans on a variety of subjects, the study found that only 21 percent of those surveyed had even the slightest clue.
"Our research revealed that the thought processes of a large majority of Americans are profoundly and fundamentally flawed," Shaw said. "We came to define this peculiar deviation as 'having one's head up one's ass.'"
Offering an example, Shaw said that when a group of people who had undergone cosmetic surgery were asked, "Why do some individuals feel the need for cosmetic surgery while others do not?," 54 percent of them responded that people who opt for such procedures have greater self-worth than those who don't.
"In other words," Shaw said, "they believed that people who don't feel the need to spend thousands of dollars on facelifts and collagen lip injections lack pride in their looks, failing to acknowledge their own wholesale buying into the notion that in our society, a person's value is determined by his or her appearance."
Another manifestation of the missing-the-point phenomenon, Shaw said, is college students' habit of purchasing posters that advertise products. "Companies normally pay to have their wares touted," Shaw said. "But an incredibly high number of college undergraduates are willing to plunk down $15 for a poster of the Taco Bell chihuahua or Budweiser lizards, enabling companies to generate revenue from something that is supposed to be an expense."
The study also cited the public's constant call for more wholesome, family-friendly movies that do not insult their intelligence, as well as its failure to patronize such films when they are offered.
"To date, Adam Sandler's Big Daddy has grossed $161 million, with a majority of its audience consisting of children under the age of 14," Shaw said. "Contrasting this is the challenging, critically lauded flop The Iron Giant, which has barely broken the $20 million mark."
Despite the preponderance of evidence supporting its findings, the Georgetown study has drawn widespread criticism from the American public.
"If I want to miss the point, that's my own business," said Ernie Schayr, a Wheeling, WV, auto mechanic. "If I want to complain about having to pay taxes while at the same time demanding extra police protection for my neighborhood, that's my right as an American. Most people in other countries don't ever get the chance to miss the point, and that's tragic. The East Timorese are so busy fleeing for their lives, they never have the chance to go to the supermarket during the busiest time of the week and complain to the cashier about how long the lines are and ask them why they don't do something about it."
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http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29245
This applies perfectly to Americans in recent times.
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01-11-2009, 08:38 PM
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#2
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Harlem
Posts: 6,909
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I love the onion.
__________________
No Gods. No Kings.
Not all beliefs and ideas are equal.
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01-11-2009, 08:43 PM
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#3
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 205
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KontanKarite
I love the onion.
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Hehe, I tricked my brother into thinking this article was real .
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01-11-2009, 09:46 PM
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#4
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: elsewhere
Posts: 2,015
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I'd love it if someone actually did that survey
__________________
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat
How I wonder where you're at.
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
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01-11-2009, 10:20 PM
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#5
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tokyo, Japan
Posts: 1,178
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The Onion rules.
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01-11-2009, 10:30 PM
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#6
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: El Paso, Texas/ Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua
Posts: 9,203
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My favorite part is the one of the Iron Giant. It's so true.
__________________
"No theory, no ready-made system, no book that has ever been written will save the world.
I cleave to no system. I am a true seeker."
-Mikhail Bakunin
Quote:
Originally Posted by George Carlin
People who say they don’t care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don’t care what people think.
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01-12-2009, 06:13 AM
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#7
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: the concrete and steel beehive of Southern California
Posts: 7,449
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Reminds me of the National Lampoon newsprint article:
"Scientists able to detect the presence of God "in the air"
BOSTON MA
Scientists using sensitive equipment were today able to detect the presence of God "in the air".
They said he is 60 feet tall with a long white beard and wears large sandals whose size "is off the charts".
I wish I could find it, but alas, Google fails me.
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