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Literature Please come visit. People get upset, write poetry about it, and post it here. Sometimes we also talk about books.

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Old 03-13-2008, 04:59 PM   #151
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Dude.... words cannot describe how awesome you are... you have my vote for most awesome member of Gnet ever.
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Old 03-14-2008, 09:18 PM   #152
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Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Von Paine and The Clan were not the only ones who could use optics to see distant activity. Mr. Child lowered the binoculars and turned to face Molly McKenzie.

"You were right Miss. One car is leaving the Castle in the direction of town, but there is a second one leaving that just took the Old Forest Road."

Molly didn't bat an eye.

"Damn it!" The redhead looked down, critical eyebrows furrowed in thought. "He looked in the forest after all. But it will do him no good, preventing the the first car from reaching town will leave the second car without police. She can take care of single car of occupants." Molly almost spoke with pride about her counterpart in her plan. Molly used strategy to draw money and power, and Emerald used strategy to draw...blood.

She looked up at her bodyguard. "Take out the first car as planned."

"Yes Miss."

----------------------------------------

Edward drove quickly, Von Paine had told him driving slowly may make him vulnerable to attack. "We Watchers of The Clan are ourselves being watched. Take precautions. Drive quickly." he had said.

The tall groves of eucalyptus and oak trees flashed flickering light of the late afternoon sun across his windshield and view as he drove through the forest to town.

BAM! His rear tire blew out, forcing the car to fishtail. Edward's instincts took over, he twisted the steering wheel to counter the rear inertia of the motorcar, but gravel on the road, and the bad luck of being on a turn when it happened, together with his high speed all conspired to swing the rear of the massive vehicle off the shoulder and into an oak tree, the shock wave violently slamming him into a counter spin and flipping the entire car over, dirt and debris spewing across the forest floor.

------------------------------------------

He woke up, hanging upside down in the seatbelt. He smelled gasoline. He could hear crackling.

When he turned around, he became pale at the sight: gasoline pouring out of the gas tank was soaking the leaves and forest floor, and worse, the tail light wires had sparked a flame on one of the gas soaked deflated back tires. It was melting, pouring black smoke into the sky, and was about to pour molten, flaming rubber into the pool of gas on the ground.

He grappled with the seat belt and realized that his left arm was broken. The adrenaline from the moments of the crash prevented him from feeling any pain...until now. He tried to use his right hand to reach over and unbuckle himself but was having trouble. Then he saw upside down legs walking up to him. The chauffeur. Miss McKenzie's chauffeur. Holding a rifle.

"Well, having a bit of trouble? You shouldn't be driving so fast on this road. I'll put you out of your misery." He raised the rifle. Then the molten tire dripped it's fiery tongue to the fuel soaked ground.

The flash of light startled the chauffeur. Edward had expected an explosion, but instead the fuel sent up a flaming tower as if Hell had risen from the earth, bright and hot, but steady, not an explosion.

"Well, no need for the police to find you with a bullet in your head, when high speed tire tracks and an exploded gas tank are all they need. Goodbye."

Mr. Child left. Edward looked behind him at the huge tower of flame and black smoke as the burning leaves slowly made their way towards the gas tank. He could see the paint blistering on the metal skin of the car...

---------------------------------------------------

Von Paine explained to Renatus and Crimson while Renatus drove the trio in the opposite direction from Edward.

"As I renewed my scanning I realized that if an enemy knew I was scanning the town from time to time, they might realize that the best place to hold a hostage would be outside the town. So I began searching the forest.

I saw in my heightened awareness that eagles which are normally seen flying back and forth from their nests in a particular canyon, that they and their soaring were noticeably absent. I did find them however, perched in their nests. They normally do not do this, unless an intruder in their environment is present.

Checking the canyon bottom, I could perceive tracks that appeared to be made by a bicycle. It is possible that they were made by a lone nature lover, but the timing is too coincidental. "

Von Paine was loading a rifle as he spoke in the back seat. Up front, Crimson was distracting Renatus: she had dressed at the castle before they left in a black, skin tight suit, with black sneakers and black leather gloves. her dark hair was sufficient for her head, that and camflage makeup she was now applying on her cheeks, reminding Renatus of a woman putting on makeup, not preparing for battle. She also prepared coils of rope, and checked her leg scabbard strapped to her shapely thigh, which secured an intimidating hunter's knife, one side gleaming with jagged teeth in the afternoon sunlight that flickered through the trees as it had on Edward.

"But if it is the kidnappers, shouldn't we wait until the police have arrived to have numbers on our side?" Renatus spoke in the calm voice of reason; strategy, not fear ringing in his words.

"We must find the hideout before the sun sets. It would be too difficult in the dark. We can then guide the police that Edward will bring to the location."
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Old 03-14-2008, 09:55 PM   #153
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Quote:
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HP... I'm working on 2 novels... well, they be on hold. Hm, anyways, do you have any tips on how to write a decent novel?
Just to add to what H.P said, in order for you, the writer, to write a decent story you must first find the style you're most comfortable with, and mold. Good grammar is of utmost important when writing; learn how to use and manipulate words pleasingly, and be sure you're familiar with punctuation marks such as the semicolon, colon, comma, and so on, and what their purposes are. After all, you can't (again I'll reiterate that tiresome metaphor) build a house without the proper tools.

But most importantly--and don't ever forget--practice, practice, practice, and practice some more, 'til you're all practiced out for that particular day. Set aside some time (preferably when it's quiet and there's little or no people around) and write for about two or so hours, little things like short stories. Publishing is not easy, and I can guarantee (and this is speaking for myself as well) that you're nowhere near ready to publish your own novel right now; a lot of people are totally convinced it's as easy as sending a manuscript to a publisher and that's that. Chances are you'll need a literary agent first as many major publishing houses, as well as small ones, will not accept unsolicited manuscripts. Simply because there are so many people in the queue, and the publishers don't have the time nor the patience to waste on new writers that, most likely, don't even have what they're looking for in their writing.

Start small, enter contests for short stories in your preferred genre to see if you can gain a toehold in the industry. It's an arduous journey, but if you're truly sure you want to be a writer then, by all means, shoot for the goal.

*End thread-jacket* (Sorry H.P)
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Old 03-15-2008, 08:08 AM   #154
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That was a good chapter. I like your description of Crimson's outfit. I like your detailing.
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Old 03-15-2008, 12:40 PM   #155
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This is great. Really fun.
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Old 03-15-2008, 08:33 PM   #156
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Chapter 25

Chapter 25

The sun had descended between two western mountain tops, as if descending into the valley to extend it's day would avoid the inevitable twilight to come.

Molly admired the view, content with her progress sufficiently to contemplate something as unimportant as a sunset. They were south bound on the outskirts of town when her driver brought her attention back to current events.

"Miss, do you see them?"

"What? See who?" She squinted straight ahead. "Oh hell!"

Coming towards them on the opposite side of the road from town were fire engines, their sirens now coming into hearing. The driver pulled over to the shoulder of the road with compliance as three fire engines carrying water, and a hook and ladder went by them loudly, followed by two police cars. Molly's driver turned and looked at her. "What now Miss?"

"But how could they know?" Molly turned and looked out the rear window. She had her answer.

Rising up high into the late afternoon sky was a tall, black thread of smoke. The black smoke from the burning tires.

"Mr. Child, we need to get some things from the house and leave town for a while. Just in case."

"But the recall: people will wonder what happened to you. They will become suspicious if you leave when no one has accused you of anything."

"But they may accuse you, and you work for me. No, I am not taking any chances. We're leaving, and leaving as soon as we get a few things. What are you waiting for? Let's go, now!"

"Yes Miss."

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Take precautions..."

Von Paine's words reminded Edward. As the fire light grew brighter, and had ignited the branches of an oak tree hanging over the flaming car, he reached into his right boot with his good hand and took out a large knife. He cut the seat belt and fell with pain onto his head and right shoulder. Now he could use his legs and knees to crawl through the window.

The heat was intense now, and painfully close. His right hand was almost burned as he placed it on the metal side of the car to steady himself as he stood up. He backed away and turned towards the road, carefully looking both ways for the chauffeur. Once he reached the shoulder of the road he looked back just in time to see a tremendous jet of flame blow straight up from the hole in the gas tank. The tank metal began to swell, the bending under pressure ringing and moaning as it distorted. He looked for cover; he was still only 50 feet away.

The car exploded, flaming fragments and debris stabbing in every direction. Edward hit the ground, and with his good arm tried to shield his head. Pieces of metal and even flaming branches from the oak fell about him and on him, but fortunately, nothing large. The small flaming bits that landed on him he quickly put out.

He got up. The car was completely engulfed inflames. Now, was he closer to the Castle or to town? But Von Paine! He would need help. Edward used the knife to cut two strips out of his broken arm's sleeve, with the cuff button on one strip and the button hole on the other, looped them around and then buttoned them together, making a sling which he then slung over his head. He started walking quickly towards town.

Eventually the fire engines and police met him along the way.
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Old 03-16-2008, 04:25 AM   #157
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Hmmmmm, now I'm interesting in seeing if Mr. Child will get caught with this......
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Old 03-16-2008, 05:03 PM   #158
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Chapter 26

Chapter 26

The beginning sunset washed the huge boulders and canyon walls with a reddish orange hue, so it happened that they smelled the bloody entrails before they saw them. Crimson smelled it first.

"Something smells...dead." Her words stopped Renatus who had been leading the way despite earlier protest from his bodyguard.

He had been firm with her that now she was his to protect, and he would allow no harm to come to her. Since their kiss in the Library, their previous relationship was forgotten replaced by the deeper bond of love they now knew. It brought out some previously hidden courage in him.

He looked around. So did Crimson, but Von Paine saw it first.

"There, just in front of you my lad. See the flies?"

Renatus looked closely at the trail ahead. There it was: bloody gore and some kind of entrails smeared over several stones across their path, swarming with ants and flies. Von Paine walked up and in front of his daughter and Renatus to inspect it closely.

"An attempt to thrown off police dogs looking for scent. No predator would do this. This is deliberate." He looked up the canyon walls, trying to see the tops.

"Crimson..."

"Yes father, I'm checking. Nothing else so far." Her eyesight was superior to her father's aged eyes, as was her hearing and sense of smell.

"Then let us continue, but spread out with at least 15 paces between us. Whispers only now."

Crimson strained her hearing. Surely a child would make some sound. But there was only their footsteps, softly but on sand and grit making a rough sound as they hiked.

Von Paine followed them taking up the rear, his silence belied his internal debate. He had brought the wine, premixed with the hybrid coffee in a winesack, in preparation to use it to give them all an advantage over the kidnappers, but now he remembered the reaction of Renatus and Crimson taking the potion in view of each other. If the young couple drank it now, would they be able to concentrate on finding the hideout and then withdrawing silently back to the car on the shoulder of Old Forest Road, or would they succumb to physical attraction to each other, distracted by what he supposed to be a side effect of increased hormone production as well as adrenaline? He looked up at his daughter and reconsidered the battery pack and wires about her waist,a small portable version of the high frequency generator carried on her back. Renatus carried the same, as did Von Paine himself. It may do more harm if they tried to use his invention now instead of calmer, non-stimulated thought and reflexes. He pursed his mouth and and continued the hike as he debated himself.

Renatus stopped. "There." he whispered. He was pointing at the left side of the canyon wall.

They were at a fortunate time of day. The setting sun glared and illuminated the cave entrance, while they were at the canyon bottom, already in shadow. They could see the cave better than an observer in the cave could see them. But there was nothing to be seen. The cave entrance was a gaping black hole with no reflection, except for two arcs of light just inside the cave wall. Renatus and Crimson were puzzled by this until Von Paine whispered back.

"Bicycle rims. They are a reflection. We must withdraw."

"But father, the police aren't here yet, and they would give away the element of surprise. Let's strike now! We can do it!"

Von Paine thought and bit his lip. Closing his eyes he thought of consequences, trying to see outcomes.

"Perhaps. But if we fail it would be for the good of the child that the police know where he is."

Von Pain walked up to the nearest tree and taking out his knife, carved a large "V" in the bark facing the trail. Then he walked up to his daughter. He took the wine sack out and she reached for it, uncapping it and taking a healthy swig. He took her shoulders as he spoke.

"Climb above the cave. Be prepared to defend Renatus and the child. I will make the frontal assault."
He kissed her forehead. "Be careful my dear." she hugged her father. Then she hugged Renatus. The couple kissed briefly.

Von Paine put his hand on Renatus shoulder. "Let's go my lad." He handed the wine sack to Renatus, and then took a drink too. "Don't turn on the generator yet. Wait until we are all in place." They began to hike up the narrow side of the canyon trail leading to the mouth of the cave.
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Old 03-16-2008, 05:57 PM   #159
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Chapter 27

Chapter 27

"Good, no police. It looks clear Miss."

"Stay here, keep the motor running, I'll be right back."

"Yes Miss."

Molly ran up to her town house door, but found it ...unlocked and partially opened! She slowly opened it and peeked inside, listening. Nothing. Perhaps the police were already here and searched?...She closed the door and started up the stairs to her bedroom.

"Hello Miss BITCH!" A woman's voice. A very angry woman's voice!

Molly turned around and opened her mouth in shock. Sitting in the sunset shadows of her parlor was Dawn Raven. She got up and slowly walked towards Molly.

"What are you doing breaking and entering my home? I will call the police!"

"Oh, I have already spoken to the police. They were here and searched your rat's nest for my son! MY SON!"

"Of course I don't have your son! Why would he be here? You are making a stupid mistake! I will press full charges..."

"Then why would your chauffeur want to shoot someone driving to warn the police? Why would someone want to kidnap a financial supporter against your recall of the Mayor? Why? WHY?"

"Dawn, leave me alone, my driver..." She never got a chance to finish her threat. Dawn lunged at Molly, who was turning towards the door to run and yell, but Dawn tackled her to the floor and with the anger of a she-bear grabbed Molly and twisted her around, slamming her red head against the wooden floor.

"You BITCH!" She slapped Molly, and then backhanded her, Molly fighting back with nails trying to claw Dawn's face. "My SON!" Molly grabbed Dawn's earrings and yanked them out, blood flying across Dawn's cheeks and Molly's face.

"AAAHHH!"

Outside, Mr. Child heard the screams, but as he was about to get out of the car, he heard approaching sirens. Police sirens. He looked back at the town house.
"Miss! MISS!"

The town house door remained closed, and the screams continued. The police were getting closer. He threw the car in gear and gunned it, and pulled out into traffic just as the police were pulling up. Two police cars. Mr. Child looked in horror as he saw in his rear view mirror the angry face of Edward, pointing at him and saying something.

The chauffeur gunned the engine and sped through town, both police cars in pursuit. He turned at the first alley, running over trash cans and debris, and erupted in squealing tires out onto the next road, forcing cars in both directions to slam on their brakes. The police cars burst forth next from the alley way, tires squealing in pursuit, lights flashing and sirens screaming.

The chased man raced for the road out of town, the police close behind.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

As Dawn grasped her ears in pain Molly kicked up and bucked Dawn off of her abdomen, rolled and clambered to her feet, trying for the door. She had locked it! She turned and saw Mrs. Raven getting up with clenched teeth and wide open eyes, eyebrows creased in hatred. Molly abandoned the door and raced up the stairs: if she could only get her gun! She was halfway up the stairs when the enraged mother grabbed Molly's ankles and pulled her down, the two women an explosion of long dresses flowering in movement as they tumbled.

Impacting the floor, Dawn dug her nails into Molly's neck, as the redhead tried to scratch her tormentor's face. Dawn squeezed, drawing blood now as her nails dug deeper and deeper into Molly. Molly McKenzie was fighting for her life now, choking and clawing, but the mother whose child had been kidnapped was enraged, primitive defense behavior evolved from the days of the cavemen had taken over now, a defense of her young. Molly could barely see the face of death as she could no longer breath, and then everything turned bright.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

On the Old Forest Road, Mr. Child pressed the accelerator to the floor, on open road there were no longer any obstacles to the high performance motor car that was far superior to the police cars. In the forest he could barely hear the sirens now as he left them behind, his speedometer pegged at 100 MPH. He was going to escape!

He came around the bend in the forest road and there... was the burnt out hulk of Edward's car, being loaded onto a tow truck, blocking the road.

He slammed on the brakes, but the loose gravel and high speed conspired against his control, and the motorcar spun out, slammed into the burned car wreckage and flipped, rolling several times.

The tow truck driver saw Mr. Child thrown from the car and watched in amazement as the driver flew through the air and impacted an oak tree, a crack clearly resounding even with the sound of twisting and tearing metal as the once beautiful car was destroyed by the massive tree. The man's body fell to the ground and lay unmoving, in a most unnatural position. The tow truck driver had never seen a man's head facing the opposite way before.
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Old 03-16-2008, 06:47 PM   #160
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Damn I am a bitch bent on revenge huh?
I LOL when I saw afterwards that you had just happened to have made a post to the REVENGE thread! Honest, I hadn't seen that when I wrote this last chapter!
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Old 03-17-2008, 04:09 AM   #161
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NOOOOOOOOO!!

I come back, right? RIGHT?!?!
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Old 03-17-2008, 06:12 AM   #162
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NOOOOOOOOO!!

I come back, right? RIGHT?!?!
Maybe I'll have you come back as a ghost haunting the forest in the sequel.
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Old 03-17-2008, 06:18 AM   #163
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Sequel? Bah! I didn't even get to come on Molly's thigh-high leather boots and lick it off.

So young...... so much to give....... too bad I was a shit driver.
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Old 03-17-2008, 06:32 AM   #164
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Well just remember, as I said earlier in this thread: this is pure fiction, any resemblance to an actual person living or dead is purely coincidental. It doesn't mean you are persona non grata in future stories.
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Old 03-17-2008, 10:27 AM   #165
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27 Chapters and 18,397 words so far. Not even halfway to novel length yet. It will take this story and it's sequel for me to reach one novel, assuming the sequel is at least as good as the first. I wonder how far Bella got before she gave up?
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Old 03-17-2008, 05:44 PM   #166
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I like yours over hers, but only because I do not care for sailing ships and such. I am not much of that kind of novel person. You could lengthened it with fancy details and talking and passion and shit. But I like yours because it gets straight to the point and it's an awesome read.
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Old 03-18-2008, 05:04 AM   #167
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Well just remember, as I said earlier in this thread: this is pure fiction, any resemblance to an actual person living or dead is purely coincidental. It doesn't mean you are persona non grata in future stories.
Ha, I was just kidding - it's your story, of course, and is your call. I still wanna know what happens to the others.

But the boots........ that is a damn shame.
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Old 03-19-2008, 06:18 PM   #168
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Chapter 28

Chapter 28

When she left them Crimson hiked back down the trail to an opportunity she noticed just before: a place to climb the cliff where she would not be exposed and vulnerable should the kidnappers come out of the cave and look, a crevice that fractured the cliff wall and was nearly perpendicular to the canyon, parallel to the cave. She found the crevice wide enough for two to hike through shoulder to shoulder. She put a hand to her belt and turned on her portable high frequency generator to the low setting. The wine/stimulant mix was already affecting her, and when she began to feel the adrenaline she began climbing quickly. She could see every crack in the stone, how strong or weak it was, and her decision to grasp and pull was almost instantaneous with seeing it. She felt no exertion, she willed herself up the cliff wall and it happened. She was two stories up the cliff when she looked out the entrance to the crevice she had entered, and saw sunset pink on the wisps of clouds against the twilight sky, a sliver of blue sandwiched by the dark of the crevice walls. She saw the dark brown cliff wall on the opposite side of the canyon, dark now in the early evening. Even in the darkening light she could judge that this part of the canyon was more of a gully than canyon, she could even judge the distance to within feet.

Another half second later she scanned the top of the far cliff wall... and saw the trap!

Extending from the shrubs at the top of the cliff was a long black barrel that could only be a rifle. Her hyper aware mind instantly extrapolated it's aim and determined it was pointing towards her father and Renatus!

She pushed off the cliff wall, every nerve aware, enabling her quickened reflexes to land her like a cat, not only on all fours but with stealth. She reached the entrance and prepared to turn left towards the men, her men...

-----------------------------------------------------------

Renatus was creeping close to the cave mouth, also on all fours and at a nod from Von Paine turned on his portable generator. As the adrenaline began to flow, he was not certain if what happened next was part of the effect, or something else. It took him a full second to realize what happened.

He had watched the old man, rifle in hand crouch and walk to the cave mouth. Von Paine was peering around the corner, and then his eyes grew wide. He then confidently stood up and faced the cave mouth directly, but was lowering his rifle, when his back suddenly sparkled and crackled in an explosion.

Von Paine fell forward from the rear impact, the vacuum tubes on his generator releasing electric sparks and shimmering glass where the bullet hit, but that was all that was broken. Renatus instantly realized his mentor had been shot, and that he also was wearing a bullet proof vest.

At almost the same time, while the glass tube fragments were still flying horizontally in defiance of gravity, a black blur suddenly blocked his right field of vision.
Crimson! She scooped up her father and then lunged into the cave mouth.

Renatus did not need to turn to see the sniper, the sound of the shot now reached his ears, they instantly triangulated the location that he knew to be the top of the far cliff wall. Still watching Crimson carrying her father into the cave, he saw them go by the bicycle, laying down.

His adrenaline in full flow now he reached the bike in two steps, flipped it over and arms pushing outward, launched it forward over the cave entrance lip, and jumping after it, landed on the bike to fly down as quickly as gravity would take him, a move to astonish the sniper and distract them from his love and his mentor, but to also get him to where he needed to be: closer to the child.
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:20 PM   #169
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Chapter 29

As Crimson reached her father, her senses looked ahead and saw there no one in the cave, it did not go back very far and was empty except for the mountain bike.

Computing bullet trajectories and cave angles she knew the left hand corner against the ground would be safe from the sniper, and that for the shooter to change their position to be able to shoot inside the cave would reveal the enemy's position. She would be ready.

Without turning around she "knew" that Renatus was grabbing the bicycle as she was moving her father to the protected corner of the cave. She could hear him inhaling great gusts of air as he exerted himself, but as to what was something she was blind to. She turned around in time to see Renatus, the one she was charged with protecting, leaping over and down the cave lip!

She quickly crept as close to the cave entrance as she dared without losing cover and in one well practiced move drew out her knife from it's scabbard and watched the barrel on the far cliff top. Come on you bastard...come on...

The sniper must have been astonished by her love's brazen action, as it seemed an eternity before the head emerged, to be able to look over the cliff and down into the gully to aim.

Crimson was ready: muscles supercharged and oxygenated, breasts swelling with a final gasp and contracting her right arm, she hurled it like a tiger from a crouch, thumb and fingers splayed and following through to launch the knife 75 feet across the gully.

Her eagle eyes followed the knife and were rewarded with the silent impact into the top of sniper's right shoulder as the assassin was bent down looking below at Renatus. The reaction was NOT silent as the scream reached Crimson and she realized it was...a woman's scream!

From behind her, her father whispered.
"Take the rifle, my eyes..." Before he could finish, she had grasped the offered weapon and turned around to take advantage of the wounded sniper to race out and down the cave lip after her love.

------------------------------------------------------

"STOP WHERE YOU ARE!"

Crimson looked up as Emerald Woulf's voice echoed on the cliff walls, and did not fear death but what she saw at the top of the cliff four stories high did make her stop in fear. It was the only thing that could have done it.

There was the sniper standing unafraid, but with her right shoulder bleeding and blood stained. Her left hand was holding Brandan...by his foot...over the cliff edge!

The child was bound and gagged, but eyes were wide open, tears that had left well marked trails down his face were now dripping down his forehead and down the cliff, four stories down, to splatter on the rocks. Crimson was at the bottom of the gully in front of the cave mouth where her father was, looking up in horror. Her father was looking across the gully, helpless and without weapons and generator. Then the assassin yelled again:


"EMPTY YOUR RIFLE AND THROW THE AMMO TO THE LEFT AND THE RIFLE AWAY TO THE RIGHT!"


Crimson had to buy time! Where was Renatus?
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:32 PM   #170
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Very good sir. I have a suggestion. Perhaps my character could escape from his captors, or something. Just an idea. I like it so far.
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:37 PM   #171
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stormtrooper of Death
Very good sir. I have a suggestion. Perhaps my character could escape from his captors, or something. Just an idea. I like it so far.
Yes! Excellent suggestion, and you are not the only evil one who will resurface, with hard won experience with how to now deal with Herr Paine!

And to the other reader's: I know I said the next two chapters would wrap it up, but as I wrote today's two chapters my muse just kept going and going and going... so maybe 2 or three more chapters to the end. Or maybe I'll just cave in and make it continuous.

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy today's new chapters!
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Old 03-19-2008, 11:38 PM   #172
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Wait... did Duane die? I haven't seen anything about him in a while.
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Old 03-20-2008, 06:42 PM   #173
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Very good Humane, very action packed. I like it.
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Old 03-20-2008, 09:49 PM   #174
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Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Crimson knew she had to buy time. Her father was weaponless behind and above her, too far across the gully to do any good. She herself was at the gully bottom, four stories below the child, she could not prevent a fatal fall as the child's mass and inertia would be deadly to both herself as well as the child if she tried to catch him. Renatus had driven the bike quickly back to the entrance of the canyon and out of sight. She had to give him time! For a split second she thought of him leaving them...but she knew he would not do that.

She nodded yes to the kidnapper and slowly ejected each cartridge from the rifle, one cartridge at a time. Time!

"HURRY! STOP STALLING!"

Crimson went a little faster, now all five cartridges were ejected and she bent over to pick them up, and then threw them to the right as demanded. Thirty seconds so far. She then slowly stood up and then threw the rifle to the left. Renatus would need more time!

She yelled back:

"We didn't come back to kill you! We came with the money, but we're armed to prevent ourselves from being robbed!"

"LIAR! WHERE'S THE MONEY?" The kidnapper looked at Von Paine across the gully. The old man nodded yes.

It was working! Her father joined the charade, himself yelling to Emerald.

"I'll climb down and bring it to you."

"SHOW ME FIRST!"

Von Paine stopped. His bluff had been called. He slowly began to unstrap his backpack containing the now shattered generator.

"SHOW ME!"

What Von Paine saw happened next shocked him and froze him in fear. Crimson saw it too, but she had a different angle of view and her heart lept with joy as she prepared to help.

Her father saw Renatus leap out of the shrubs behind Emerald and grab the child, leaping straight outward from the cliff's edge. He succeeded in stealing the child right out of the kidnapper's hand and they both were now launched into open air above the gully floor, only now...

From below, Crimson saw Renatus leap out from the cliff edge, grab the child and pull it from Emerald's hand. Following right behind him was a rope, tied to his right foot. Renatus and Brandon, the child's head pressed tightly against his rescuers chest, stretched the rope taught and then began to fall against the cliff wall, a mere single story below the cliff top. He impacted the cliff wall with the same crystalline shatter as his generator absorbed the brunt of the impact.

As Crimson started scaling the cliff wall in her hyper aware state, she saw the look of shock on Emerald's face, then saw her smile as she picked up Crimson's knife and began cutting the rope! Crimson had to reach the child in time!

Renatus realized what was happening and began to lower the child to Crimson as she climbed, but even three stories could be fatal!

Crimson reached the child's upside down head, and looped an arm between his bound hands, just as Emerald cut the rope.

Renatus looked at Crimson, and she looked at him. I can't save the child and you at the same time! What will you do my love?

Renatus felt the pressure relax on his foot, and he began to fall. As he fell and saw Crimson and the child hugging the cliff wall, he could see Emerald Woulf above and behind them, smiling. Then her smile exploded to the left in bone teeth and blood! Then with wide eyes, her skull exploded, spewing bone and brain matter in a fan of white. He heard the shots come from the canyon entrance behind him. Then his legs felt something solid and all thought ceased.
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Old 03-21-2008, 11:05 AM   #175
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Thanks Raven, but I wrote it when I was too tired and missed some gross mistakes: calling the child "it", using "foot" when I should have used "ankle", "lept" instead of "leapt", but damn! I had to write it out last night because it was flashing through my mind and I couldn't sleep! The vision was soooo vivid and I wanted to capture it's essence before I slept and woke up with no memory of it (which happens sometimes, I have lost visions because I didn't write them down. Now I sleep with a journal on my nightstand to write them down should I have a vision before falling asleep).

Anyway, thanks again for reading it. As long as there is at least one reader who enjoys it I will keep writing.
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