The Everyday Vampire

[Spooky.purple]

Everyone moves with the times. Don't they?

"There’s questions… There’s always questions. So I have a choice. Three, actually (let me know if there are more)

1) I can answer the same old questions each time anybody and everybody asks, once they’ve twigged about me (or once I’ve just come straight out and told them – there are some people out there who really aren’t that bright);

2) I can wait till someone asks those same old questions, at which point I whip my coat open to reveal a billboard carefully inscribed with all the answers. That way, I don’t have to go over it all again for the umpty-umpth time. However, it only takes one person to get the wrong idea about my intentions and I end up in a police cell charged with goodness knows what…

or

3) Er…. This. Just keep reading…"


https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...-a-day-as-any/

[Spooky.purple]

So, was I born like this or was I turned? That’s what you wanted to ask, wasn’t it? I mean, I’m obviously real, so…

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...s-coming-next/

[Spooky.purple]

Shall I tell you about the things I can do????

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...or-the-record/

[Spooky.purple]

"If you’re interested, I can share some of my secrets… things that anyone can do. But you’ll have to ask nicely."

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...s-and-bodices/

[Spooky.purple]

"Can someone be turned into a vampire?

Actually, the real question is, if we were to meet, would I bite you?"


https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...s-schmenetics/

[Spooky.purple]

"...I do have a delightful little pick-me-up. It’s one of my little secrets that I’ll let you in on."

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...errily-on-huh/

[Spooky.purple]

"Get over it, ducks…."


https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...ns-of-madness/

[Spooky.purple]

Ooops. Better late than..... you know.

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...eck-the-halls/

[Spooky.purple]

'There are some rules that make perfect sense to follow – like “don’t jump off an eight storey building into a cup of water.” That one never ends well.'


https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...letting-it-go/

HAPPY NEW (ish) YEAR!

[Spooky.purple]

"You keep using that word..."

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...ing-that-word/

[Spooky.purple]

So what exactly is spectrophobia anyway?
https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...irrors-part-1/

[Spooky.purple]

Why do strange things always happen in butchers shops?

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...irrors-part-2/

[Spooky.purple]

Keep young and beautiful.
https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...oure-worth-it/

[Spooky.purple]

...would smell as sweet?


https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...ny-other-name/

[Spooky.purple]

Discretion is the safest part of valour....

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...etly-discrete/

[Spooky.purple]

Got large?

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...g-a-wild-time/

[Spooky.purple]

Rise??!!

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...g-to-the-bait/

[Spooky.purple]

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...ing-backwards/

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Being a bit cock-a-donkey...

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...s-and-bottoms/

[Spooky.purple]

It's a short journey...

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...ound-the-bend/

[Spooky.purple]

And all up to date...

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...rambling-eggs/

[Spooky.purple]

What scares a vampire?

You may be surprised...

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...g-to-fear-but/

[Spooky.purple]

Humans are soooo touchy....

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.co...trigger-happy/

[Spooky.purple]

I mean, everyone flies in their sleep, don't they?

Don't they?

https://everydayvampire.wordpress.com/2015/04/

[Stormbringer]

For how short a while man speaks, and withal how vainly. And for how long he is silent. Only the other day I met a king in Thebes, who had been silent already for four thousand years.

- Lord Dunsany, The Idle City