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| Shill Post your website announcements here. Anything that is blatantly SPAM (nigerian schemes, make money fast, etc) will be deleted. Actually, we'd probably keep the nigerian schemes around to make fun of it. |
03-30-2011, 05:23 PM
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#1
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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Message of Salvation
Only one path to heaven.!! Free ticket!! Message of salvation!!tell everyone you know!! All You have to do is believe in Jesus Christ! I am writing you only as a witness I only wish for anyone who reads this message to pray!! I mean what would it hurt? you only have to pray this one simple prayer, and the Lord Jesus says in his word whosoever shall call upon the name of the lord shall be saved, that's a definite shall be forever saved forever which means you are destined to go to heaven. Just plz pray with me this one simple prayer. Lord Jesus I believe in you Lord I know I can't save myself, will you plz save me I know I'm a sinner Jesus, but I believe you died on the cross for my sins, and that God the father rose you from the dead after 3 days Plz forgive me of my sins Jesus! I accept you into my heart Lord as my personal Lord, and savior I pray this in your name amen !!!!!!!
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03-30-2011, 05:32 PM
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#2
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Back in Wisconsin(thinking about invading the south)
Posts: 3,693
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The fact you listed your location as Kentucky is a giveaway.
__________________
"The chaos of the world viewed from a distance reveals perfection."- me
"Never overestimate the intellect of someone so foolish that they would exploit and perpetuate stupidity in the people around them, for they create their own damnation as they tear out and sell the pillars that support society as a whole, bringing it crashing down upon them."-me
“I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”- Einstein
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03-30-2011, 05:38 PM
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#3
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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yes kentucky is where I moved to from michigan back a long time ago
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03-30-2011, 05:47 PM
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#4
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
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I am Jesus and you are an asshole.
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03-30-2011, 05:53 PM
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#5
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: Sugar Hill
Posts: 3,887
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Dammit Kontan, stop screwing with us.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by KontanKarite
I promote radical change through my actions.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ben Lahnger
I have chugged more than ten epic boners.
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03-30-2011, 05:56 PM
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#6
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
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I am not Kontan, I am Jesus.
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03-30-2011, 06:03 PM
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#7
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Fiddler's Green
Posts: 1,406
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Goddammit.
You really are real.
I've been such a dick.
Oh well, too late to regret.
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03-30-2011, 06:59 PM
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#8
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 89
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus
I am Jesus and you are an asshole.
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Long time no see.
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03-30-2011, 07:45 PM
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#9
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Dangit! And here I already had my handbasket picked out.
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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03-30-2011, 07:58 PM
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#10
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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salvation in the blood
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03-30-2011, 08:00 PM
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#11
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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Jesus please forgive me of my sins...with your big huge DICK.
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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03-30-2011, 08:02 PM
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#12
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Maybe if you obey his ten S&M commandments, he'll baptize you in his jism!
(* - S&M might stand for salvation and mercy ... but I doubt it.)
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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03-30-2011, 08:04 PM
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#13
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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I'll never think of salvation and mercy the same way again...
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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03-30-2011, 08:09 PM
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#14
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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I'm not joking there is only one path to heaven
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03-30-2011, 08:10 PM
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#15
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 348
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pothead
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Welcome brother
__________________
I'm just Sayain... 
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03-30-2011, 08:10 PM
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#16
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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to pray you must speak with your mouth, the prayer, that is how you pray
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03-30-2011, 08:10 PM
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#17
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 348
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vindicatedxjin
Jesus please forgive me of my sins...with your big huge DICK.
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donnt be gross/.
__________________
I'm just Sayain...
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03-30-2011, 08:11 PM
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#18
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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we are all brothers and sisters in Christ jesus
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03-30-2011, 08:11 PM
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#19
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pothead
to pray you must speak with your mouth, the prayer, that is how you pray
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We should smoke together...
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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03-30-2011, 08:11 PM
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#20
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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What manner of pot is this that your head is made of or that is on your head?
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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03-30-2011, 08:12 PM
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#21
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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Blue bow pot.
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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03-30-2011, 08:13 PM
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#22
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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I don't think jesus see's anything wrong with pot, but to smoke the peace pipe with me, you must pray, remember jesus loves you
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03-30-2011, 08:15 PM
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#23
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,185
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my hat is made of hemp
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03-30-2011, 08:16 PM
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#24
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: ∞ ∞ //▲▲\\ ∞ ∞
Posts: 4,618
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pothead
I don't think jesus see's anything wrong with pot, but to smoke the peace pipe with me, you must pray, remember jesus loves you
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Of course he does, everyone does. EVEN YOU.
__________________
rubber band balls
Bring Kontan Back
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03-30-2011, 08:16 PM
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#25
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Um, lower, oh yeah, uh, uh ... YES THERE!
Posts: 6,738
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Jesus loves me?
Well, he's gotta buy me dinner first before we can go any further.
__________________
Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!
As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.
Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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