the Corrupted Wishes game - Page 2

edible_eye · 09-01-2005, 03:43 PM

for eps -

granted. they all move into your house and you become a slave to them, carrying out every whim until you're drained and finally succumb to exhaustion, wither and die.

for pitseleh -

granted. moments after you begin to smell feelings, you're picked up and carried away to a stadium where experiments are being done on thousands of people to test the effects of xtc. you're bound by your wrists and ankles to a podium in the center and everyone huddles around you, filling your sense of smell with feelings so powerful, your head eventually explodes....

hmmm. i guess there are worse ways to go.

i wish i wasn't so cynical and uncaring.

Panther · 09-01-2005, 05:09 PM

Granted. Only now you empathize ocmpletely with everyone. Unrealizing, you log onto Gothic.net and read the rant thread after someoen has angsteda bout being dumped by hteir lover and have thier dog get run over.

You go to work extremely depressed, and mess up, cauing a large industrial accidnet, and now you can't feel below your waist. Upon waking up, you realize you've been put in the same room as a PTSD sufferer. You eventually try to hang yourself with the bed controls, causing you to be moved to the suicide watch ward, where you feel shitty and self-destructive everyday for the rest of your life.

I wish I were already in VA.

edible_eye · 09-01-2005, 05:19 PM

granted. and whilst in the midst of some violent coital experience with your boyfriend, your mom walks in demanding to know what you're doing in virgina... well, that and other things.

i wish i had a black dodge magnum.

ice · 09-01-2005, 10:01 PM

Wish granted... but it's a Hotwheels Black Dodge Magnum.

I wish I was able to put the smackdown on all the dumbasses I know without the threat of legal actions (ie trouble).

09-02-2005, 10:39 AM

Granted. Now there is complete anarchy in the country and all those dumbasses become vigilantes and they are coming after you.

I wish our air conditioning was fixed.

Panther · 09-02-2005, 04:43 PM

Granted. Only now you're house is completely covered in ice due to the air humidity.

I wish I had a laptop with a wireless internet card.

NyQuil of Doom · 09-02-2005, 05:41 PM

Granted. It also contains a nice assortment of computer viruses so it not only crashes after about a half hour, but within that half hour you spread the viruses to everyone in your address book.

I wish I could change my haircolour and hairstyle at will.

Spazik · 09-02-2005, 06:06 PM

Make me a ham sandwhich....No, wait, don't eat me! I meant I wanted a million bucks...AAAHHHH, where did all these deer come from?!?!?!

NyQuil of Doom · 09-02-2005, 06:39 PM

Aww, you didn't grant my lovely chameleon-hair wish. I bite my long thumbnail at thee.

Panther · 09-02-2005, 06:44 PM

Do thou bite thy thumb at me?

fine. Your wish is granted. However, everytime you change your hair, you loose an equivalent number of braincells. Soon you're braindead and the subject of life after vegetative state controversy.

I wish that I had more time to work on my blanket.

ice · 09-02-2005, 08:21 PM

You have more time to work on your blanket, but you fall asleep one day with it on your lap. It slips and lands upon a frayed lamp cord and conflagrates within the hour and is a pile of ash before you wake up and douse the fire.

I wish that really hot chick who stopped me in the halls today and said "I love your DEVO shirt" added "and I love YOU."

edible_eye · 09-02-2005, 10:16 PM

granted. you start dating and eventually marry and are blessed with 5 children over the next 15 years. you become fat and lazy and believe things are still decent between you until one day she comes to you while you're watching tv and drinking a beer and says the 5 children each have different fathers, none of which is you. in the midst of this, a lawyer steps out and says she will be divorcing you and she will be given every asset the both of you have accumulated, including the devo shirt which brought you together, effective immediately. you don't really have a concept of what's happening until the 5 fathers (each of which she has been banging regularly behind your back) step out from the kitchen and beat your ass before throwing you out of your own house.

i wish i didn't have a conscience.

09-03-2005, 11:42 AM

Granted. your new lack of concious alianates you from everyone that ever loved you. You dont care though, so you turn to a life of crime. After a spree of killing and bank robberies, you're finally caught while screwing some chic who keeps saying no and are incarcerated. The people in jail also dont have a concious and don't care when you scream no as they penetrate you in ways that you never thought were possible.

I wish i would stop typing in this quick reply box and then clicking on the wrong button so it never gets posted.

Panther · 09-03-2005, 07:13 PM

Granted. Only now you're unable to type coherently, and you're made the laughing stock of the entire board.

I wish that my hats fit right.

09-03-2005, 08:09 PM

Granted. Your hats now fit you most becomingly, but now all your clothes are ill fitting.

I wish that i hadn't pulled my muscle.

dreamydancer · 09-05-2005, 01:04 PM

Granted. But you will soon encounter a horrible accident which leaves you severely injured, several fractured bones; you know the whole nine yards. You are left with such fat hospital bill that you have a heart attack.

I wish I looked like Dita Von Teese. ( I don't think I spelled her name correctly.)

ice · 09-05-2005, 01:05 PM

Granted: you tore your muscle and it doesn't heal correctly. Therefore you'll never be able to use that limb again.

I wish I had telekenisis.

edible_eye · 09-05-2005, 01:17 PM

granted. however, you bang your head immediately after you receive your power and the jolt has rewired your brain. you now have reverse telekinesis and everything you move, flies at you and bounces off your body.

i wish a hot lesbian couple showed up right now and decided to make my sexual dreams come true.

edible_eye · 09-05-2005, 01:18 PM

oh, and for dreamydancer - granted. however, you have become her wax double. you no longer exist as a human.

same wish.

09-05-2005, 06:07 PM

Granted...and there was much twitching by all.

*Eh, you can't really go wrong with a hot Lesbian couple showing up at the door to make your sexual dreams come true.*

I wish that after the hot lesbian couple get through with Edible they'd come visit me.

edible_eye · 09-05-2005, 06:17 PM

granted. except they didn't wash. nothing. and you've got crusty, old sloppy, edible_eye seconds.

i wish it stayed summer forever.

(oh, and tstone - are you and the fam. ok?)

09-07-2005, 12:32 PM

Granted. But it's more like Texas summer and the tempeture will be at 108 degrees and a 90% humidity.

I wish I could finally get my hair cut and dyed the way I want.

NyQuil of Doom · 09-07-2005, 07:23 PM

Granted, however it all falls out the next day due to some weird chemical reaction.

I wish I had a well-paying job, with really good hours, that I really loved.

TeapotScar · 09-10-2005, 06:06 PM

You do, but none of your co-workers like you. You enjoy the work SO much that they think you're a freak and whisper "Weirdo" and "suck-up" when you walk by.

I wish my boyfriend was here.

NyQuil of Doom · 09-10-2005, 08:28 PM

Granted, but he's there to break up with you.

I wish I knew the secret of immortality.