the Corrupted Wishes game - Page 3

Demonista_Ravenesque · 09-10-2005, 11:15 PM

Granted, everyone gets along, the whole world is at peace, no war, no guns, nothing of hate exists anymore....but the mutant mole lumps that live underground get jealous because humans and animals *being everyone* have no idea about their existence so they go up to the top level of the earth to fight with everyone, but then everyone accepts them so the mutant mole lumps start interbreeding with other species so now we're nothing but products of mutant mole lumps

I wish DimeBag Darrel was Alive again and Pantera were together

ice · 09-11-2005, 05:38 PM

Granted: he's alive and Pantera is back together again.

But you're dead.

I wish I had a Jaguar.

edible_eye · 09-11-2005, 05:47 PM

granted. but it hasn't eaten in a while and rips your pretty fuckin' face to shreds before eating your brain.

aaaaarrrrgh! eyes beat me to it. that's /\ for ice.

i wish i had a latex woman's ass and pussy to use right about now for the drive home, maybe the jenna jameson model if she made one.

edible_eye · 09-11-2005, 05:51 PM

for eyes -

granted. everyone has hurried so much, you were swept into the crowd and instead of walking down the stairs, you've fallen and cracked your neck. unfortunately, everyone was in such a rush, no one noticed and left you where you fell, paralyzed. there you will slowly lose the ability to breathe, eventually suffocating while the final vision of an empty workplace fades from sight.

edible_eye · 09-11-2005, 05:52 PM

by the way, i just re-read my wish. that's really not a proper thing to wish for, is it? i think i need to see a doctor.

ice · 09-11-2005, 06:06 PM

You go to the doctor's office, and his secretary tells you to sit in his room and wait for the doctor. As you are gazing at the wallpaper, you realise that everything's in black and white. You sit there and puzzle about it - should you ask the doctor about that too? The doctor comes in. He asks you how you've been feeling, and you try to speak, but all that comes out is a bark. You look at your hands and feet and realize - to your horror - that you've made a grave mistake. You are now a dog, and worse yet, you're a dog with his balls attatched. Before you can bolt for the door, the doctor shoots you with a powerful anasthetic. The next day you wake up in a cold cage. You feel rather itchy in your groin and you go to lick, but oh no! You've been neutered.

I wish I were a Pinball Wizard.

edible_eye · 09-11-2005, 06:16 PM

ice - granted. i'm gonna put a quarter in you (not sexual) and play (still not sexual) - you're a pinball wizard game, god damn it.

eyes - granted. you're just about ready to go to bed for the night when a friend you haven't seen for a long time comes over, takes you by the hand and shows you the night of your life. before you leave, you turn off all the lights in your place, not realizing you've left red smudges on them from contact with your friend's hand. you can't get over how much fun you've had 'til the cops show up the next morning and begin questioning you about where you were the night before. your friend has been taken into custody and is being held on murder charges. he's implicated you as the one who did all the stabbing while he begged you to stop and there are multiple witnesses who saw you both together during the night. just then, one of the cops notices a red smudge on a light switch plate and you're taken into custody as well.

i wish i could alter my dna at will.

Demonista_Ravenesque · 09-12-2005, 12:43 AM

For E_E, granted, you can alter your dna at will, but one day you decide to become a pig because a pig's orgasm lasts for at least 30 minutes, then you accidentally walk into the slaughterhouse while ypu're still in pig form and become food for the hungry hungry dogs

I wish I had the chance to invite Donald Trump over to a party *prepares axe* sweeeeeet

edible_eye · 09-12-2005, 05:00 AM

granted.

thanx to judge david souter, the donald has done some homework on your property and before showing up for your party, he's gone through the legal system to seize control of your house and property, as well as that of several of your neighbors, and he intends to erect a casino and a hotel on the land. everyone there is removed forcibly and upon your neighbors discovering who was responsible for (you) their sudden wrenching from their homes, they decide to come after you - primarily with that axe you had sharpened.

ah, the irony.

i wish i had a cell phone with a camera in it.

Demonista_Ravenesque · 09-12-2005, 05:11 AM

damn...the irony....But Granted, you now have a cell phone with a camera in it..but it's broken and you can't fix it because it's so broken its...um...dead

I wish I had x ray eyes

NyQuil of Doom · 09-12-2005, 09:41 AM

Granted, but instead of getting to see people naked you have to look at everyone's internal organs, digestive processes, etc., which makes you lose your appetite, and you die of starvation.

I wish that I was completely happy with my looks/figure/body/face/hair/etc.

ice · 09-12-2005, 07:55 PM

Granted: You're completely happy with your "looks/figure/body/face/hair/etc." but the human race dies out. You are the last one left... except for a disturbingly fat man who follows you everywhere. You eventually pluck his eyes out while he's sleeping so he will stop oggling at you.

I wish I could whistle operas with my armpit.

Demonista_Ravenesque · 09-13-2005, 01:45 AM

Granted, you get your awesome skill and soon get a record label, but it's time to have a concert and you get killed whilst performing live by people who can't take the fact that their lovely music comes from some person's armpit.

I wish that my imaginary beer *St Spastick's Awesome Beer* was real and has intoxicated many

Corpus_Draconis · 09-13-2005, 08:15 AM

Granted, but a very large batch goes wrong and many many people are poisonned. They get extremely sick and most die, and their loved ones sue you for an incredibly huge amount that you can't pay. You are forced to live on the street, where you get hooked on crack. After a few years your have a fight with your dealer, and you're left dying from a bullet wound in a squalid alley.

I wish I was an artist in Paris in the 1920's, and I was friends with all the major artists who were there at that time.

bitter_beauty · 09-20-2005, 01:31 AM

i wish to be locked in a dark room with joey jordison for 24 hours

edible_eye · 09-20-2005, 08:32 AM

first of all, you didn't grant the wish of corpus draconis - for shame. go back and make things right.

second, your wish is granted, bitter - however, joey has brought along the girl he really wants to be with and ignores you for the full 24 hours.

i wish i had rocket powered boots.

(-$|N-) · 09-20-2005, 09:36 AM

Granted- You love your rocket boots so much that you decide to try them on a down hill road with lots of bends, while almost near the bottom you go out of control and fall the side of the road and break every bone in your body and your boots, you then lay in a hospital bed for the rest of your life.

I wish I could hack into any computer in the world and erase anything I pleased.

edible_eye · 09-20-2005, 10:15 AM

granted, except you accidentally hack into god's computer and erase yourself.

first.

i wish i had sculpted abs.

(-$|N-) · 09-20-2005, 04:43 PM

Granted - Instead of being scared all the time, you find everything to extreamly inviting and you accidently stick you hand into a blender.

I wish I could do jedi mindtricks.

ice · 09-20-2005, 06:16 PM

You can do Jedi mindtricks, but while you were mindtricking some broad you picked up in the street, you lose focus of the road and have a devastating crash. You wake up a month later with severe amnesia, and are never able to recall the method of the Jedi.

I wish I had not burnt my thumb this afternoon.

(-$|N-) · 09-20-2005, 06:27 PM

Granted - Instead of buring your thumb, you accidently catch your pants on fire.

I wish I had a pet.

edible_eye · 09-20-2005, 07:00 PM

granted. and when you try to start it, you realize it's just a shell. it's missing the engine, the gas pedal, the brake pedal, the clutch and the transmission.

i wish the temperature stayed at a cool, non-humid 75 - 80 all year long.

(-$|N-) · 09-20-2005, 07:08 PM

Granted - Instead of being short, you grow to be 10 foot tall and you are now unable to enter any building and everyone in the world now sees you as a enormus freak. The result is you being exiled to antarctica for the rest of your life.

I wish my pet was a nice boar.

edible_eye · 09-20-2005, 07:09 PM

rats - sin beat me to it.

for sin - granted. except he's a nice, horny, homosexual boar and rapes you while you sleep.

for eyes - granted. you grow. a lot. in fact, it doesn't stop and in due time, your bones are not able to support you. they crack and crumble, spilling your grotesquely distorted body across the earth, tearing through your flesh, which has been stretched far too tight. and soon, the rats come, attracted to the smell of fresh meat and blood. they devour you whole, leaving those massive, shattered bones to dry in the sun.

i wish i was spider man.

(-$|N-) · 09-20-2005, 09:17 PM

Granted - While sling web around the city you accidently get attached to a low flying plane on a miss aim. You are now being dragged because you ran out of web. When the plane goes to land you are dragged along the runway killing you. (Something like this happened to a friend of mine, except it was a school bus and he did not die.)

I wish I had my boar nuttered before it could become horny.