Rant Thread

[joyslayer]

I think maybe "diamonds of wisdom." Well put edible!

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

So my doctor ordered a particularly nasty test for me to check on the status of the Obstruction I have.

The Imaging Center calls today for scheduling and instructions..

The Scheduling nurse starts to direct me on what to do the night before the Exam.

I listen to everything she has to say, and proceed to describe the reason I am having the Procedure and the amount of Bleeding I have been having..

She puts me on hold and the Head Radiologist gets on the phone.

More Questions.

Finally I ask whether I am out of line in thinking that this test is way too risky too perform?

She says if they do it there is a chance of Peritineal Perforation and Hemorraging..

I say " Sounds like Fun!! "

*Silence*

They never get my jokes...sigh..

So now the only exam affordable enough for my no insurance having ass is too dangerous to perform..

I'm really glad I have learned enough through my 16 years of Guinea Pigdom to question EVERYTHING.

Finding all of this out Friday morning DURING the Procedure,would not be the happy ending I'm looking for these days.

Fucking Sigh..

And who's bright Motherfucking idea was it to schedule something that would make me bleed MORE?

I couldn't even leave the house today to go 5 blocks to pick up my son the pain was so crippling. Manimal was home sick and was nice enough to push his Ookiness aside and go get him for me. It still makes me feel like a pathetic piece of Crap sometimes..

My tummy is so swollen someone mentioned Twins..

Woohoo..

I've got no reproductive organs left but I can still manage to be swollen enough to LOOK pregnant..

Gee what a bonus..What do I win next?

A Frontal Lobotomy would be Nifty..

Fuck a Great Big Motherfucking Bunch of This!!

To top it all off I am exhausted beyond reason from fighting the Pain all day, but the Pain is also too intense to allow me merciful unconciousness..

It's going to be a long friggin night.

/ End Rant.

[JuliaGaltic]

I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this. I wish you didn't live across the country from me. I'm not doing anything with my days for a while, I could at least come over and help you with the mindless every day crap, like cooking and cleaning for example... I hope you have some friends or family closer by to help with the daily load. I'm sure Manimal does all he can.

My thoughts are with you doll.

[Sanctus Dei]

Oh E.P.S... that's horrible, I'm with Julia, If only I lived near I'd be over in a second to help you.

[edible_eye]

Originally Posted by Empty_Purple_Stars

Fuck a Great Big Motherfucking Bunch of This!!

To top it all off I am exhausted beyond reason from fighting the Pain all day, but the Pain is also too intense to allow me merciful unconciousness.

http://www.polarbearworld.com/images...armentfull.jpg

i'm sorry for your pain, beautiful.

[pitseleh]

It hurts to hear you are sick, EPS... By whichever deities (you included) there might be floating among us, I hope you will get better soon.

If you found a way to smuggle me over the Atlantic in a box, you could buy me as your slave for like 5 $. I'm a pretty good cook, and all I require is a tiny earthen hovel to sleep in and maybe some pot once in a while.

I've never understoon the draw rubber-kneckers have in slowing down to view the scene of an accident, that particular facet of human compulsion has eluded me...until meeting E_P_S. Now I too join in the viewing, hypmotized by the flashing lights, waiting to see if the body being pulled from the wreckage is familar...breath hung somewhere betwenn oh-my-fucking-god and I-fucking-hope-it-isn't.

It's an experience of futiltiy, of watching others go about performing the heroic measures, providing rescue breathing, adminstering the morphine drip...and we who sit and watch...salute you, E_P_S.

Fucking meh, I just wish there was a higher capactiy to function in, something above concerned peeping tom, and most of all I just wish you and yours some sense of peace and happiness without the constant squawk of radios and the stabbing flashing lights interrupting your happy-moments together every few moments, but most of all?

I so wish someone could fix you and make you all shinny and new again.

*sends big mental hugs*

[urian]

I fucking hate people that slow down to watch car accidents. When my two brothers were in their accident and Danny lay in his car with a crushed skull , bleeding to death and Sean was slumped over dead, all anyone (including the VFD) could do was stand around and watch as my parents turned into heaps of tears and sorrow and I tried to fight back my anger and help. Fuckers. It's death, it's not a side show.

And no, Tstone, I am not attacking you but, YES, you did hit a nerve with that statement. You can feel proud you hit one of the only exposed nerves I have.
MY youngest brother died and the other one suffered while sick , twisted, perverted apathetic people set around and watched like it was some kind of matinee.

Fucking thanks for dredging up those memories for me.

My intention wasn’t to snipe at you Urian, my words; in this instant, were not meant to reach out and mentally bitch slap you…I’m not omnipotent, and did not know that making a lame comparison to E_P_S’s condition and saying I felt like a rubber-knecker; the consummate outside-lookin-in observer helpless to do anything but—just look—and I’m real sorry about your brother and what you went through, going through, and if you wanted us to pause from viewing the carnage on the highway to E_P_S’s place, and come take a looksee at what’s going on with your stretch of state maintained asphalt…you don’t have to route the traffic from the one to the other, our necks are long enough to see both, and then some.

*Returns to mental hugging*

[Panther]

*hugs E_P_S* I'm so sorry, honey. I hope they figure out what's wrong, without making you go through some scary test that might make it worse.

*hugs again*

And Urian, I'm sorry that this happened to your family. *hugs as well* There's not much I can say to possibly help, so I'll refrain.

[WolfMoon]

*HUGZ all around*

Mark that's a cute-as-hell pic! Never seen a bear hugging a wolf before, Fuckin'-A!!

EPS, I wish there were words................I care about you and what you are going through, love. I'm sorry that you're stuck with morons for doctors who don't even check to see if what they're about to do will make things worse or not. But I'm mostly sorry that I can do nothing but watch as someone I care about goes through such an ordeal.

*SOB*

[urian]

Originally Posted by TStone

My intention wasn’t to snipe at you Urian, my words; in this instant, were not meant to reach out and mentally bitch slap you…I’m not omnipotent, and did not know that making a lame comparison to E_P_S’s condition and saying I felt like a rubber-knecker; the consummate outside-lookin-in observer helpless to do anything but—just look—and I’m real sorry about your brother and what you went through, going through, and if you wanted us to pause from viewing the carnage on the highway to E_P_S’s place, and come take a looksee at what’s going on with your stretch of state maintained asphalt…you don’t have to route the traffic from the one to the other, our necks are long enough to see both, and then some.

*Returns to mental hugging*

Train of thought, Thomas. you mention car wreck and onlookers and it triggers a train of thought that leads to the most painfull episode of my life. Was it something intentional? I don't believe so but this is the RANT thread and , as long as it was festering, I thought I'd vent about onlookers at car wrecks. I even mentioned that I wasnt attacking you , thomas.

It is, however laughable you think I was trying to divert anything. Trying to do that would be akin to detouring a river with a "do no enter sign". Like I said, train of thought. But my question is: Are you saying that everyone that posts a rant, bitch, gripe or whatever after ****** is trying to divert attention? I think not. You just naturally assumed that I was doing something I wasn't. It's comical to me that you would assume that.

Look, you have issues with me. I'm fine with that. But, if you want to settle them, PM me. If not, then no sweat of my back.

As I said before, it was a train of thought but believe what you wish.

*MODERATORS EDIT*

Do not EVER use MY Real Name Again!
FIRST and LAST Warning!

Originally Posted by urian

I fucking hate people that slow down to watch car accidents.

And no, Tstone, I am not attacking you but, YES, you did hit a nerve with that statement. You can feel proud you hit one of the only exposed nerves I have.

Fucking thanks for dredging up those memories for me.

It just struck me funny, is all, those bits above, coupled with the previous entires. Maybe you were projecting and merely feeding off the former, but to blame me for dredging up bad memories for you?

Let's just say I don't want that type of guilt, and I'd thank you for taking it back.

Originally Posted by urian

Fucking thanks for dredging up those memories for me.

Not to beat a dead horse but this is the statement that one could consider a personal rebuttal regardless of a disclaimer in the previous paragraph. The satement implies that he somehow did make the analogy on purpose to ruffle your feathers. Obviously you guys - sort of - worked it out and this post may be unnecissary but I really don't think Tstone meant any harm and I'm sure we can all understand how that would be a sensitive topic for you.

That's the great and terrible thing about text - especially short form like on a forum or IM - one can never truly get the tone of what the "sayer" really means. You can't hear the words, can't see the expression or body language. There's no discriptive setting like you'd find in a story. One of the things I've learned is to never jump to conclusions at a persons true meaning if there is any question whatsoever. Doing so has lead me to get upset over or believe/imply things that were simply not the other person's intention.

Take care kiddies and be careful how you interpret things. The idea is to post and have fun, not to hurt each other.

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Originally Posted by WolfMoon

*HUGZ all around*


EPS, I wish there were words................I care about you and what you are going through, love. I'm sorry that you're stuck with morons for doctors who don't even check to see if what they're about to do will make things worse or not. But I'm mostly sorry that I can do nothing but watch as someone I care about goes through such an ordeal.

*SOB*

I Love ya to Pieces Lady. It's people like you that help me take another step when I feel like giving up. Thanks for your Love and droplets of Blood over the years as well.. Means alot.

Originally Posted by Panther

*hugs E_P_S* I'm so sorry, honey. I hope they figure out what's wrong, without making you go through some scary test that might make it worse.

*hugs again*

Thanks Pretty..You'd think someone besides ME would realize they have ordered a procedure that could potentially cause me to bleed to death. Friggin Tools. Thanks for the Support.. Helps Tremendously.

Originally Posted by TStone

It's an experience of futiltiy, of watching others go about performing the heroic measures, providing rescue breathing, adminstering the morphine drip...and we who sit and watch...salute you, E_P_S.

I so wish someone could fix you and make you all shinny and new again.

*sends big mental hugs*

You have been a Rock for me in this Hell I'm in for a few years now. Your friendship and support mean the world to me Bard.
Thanks for Bleeding with me so Brightly.

Originally Posted by pitseleh

It hurts to hear you are sick, EPS... By whichever deities (you included) there might be floating among us, I hope you will get better soon.

If you found a way to smuggle me over the Atlantic in a box, you could buy me as your slave for like 5 $. I'm a pretty good cook, and all I require is a tiny earthen hovel to sleep in and maybe some pot once in a while.

We have tasty Herbal varieties here in the Northwest. Maybe we could just hire you as a professional DJ and Music Afficionado? Thanks for the Love man.
*Squeezy Hugs*

Originally Posted by edible_eye

http://www.polarbearworld.com/images...armentfull.jpg

i'm sorry for your pain, beautiful.

I love that pic too E_E. Put a big ole smile on my face.
*Kissy Noise*

Originally Posted by Sanctus Dei

Oh E.P.S... that's horrible, I'm with Julia, If only I lived near I'd be over in a second to help you.

Only if you and Julia dressed up in little Teensy Tiny French Maids uniforms..
*Hee*
Thanks for the Warm Fuzzies.

Originally Posted by JuliaGaltic

I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this. I wish you didn't live across the country from me. I'm not doing anything with my days for a while, I could at least come over and help you with the mindless every day crap, like cooking and cleaning for example... I hope you have some friends or family closer by to help with the daily load. I'm sure Manimal does all he can.

My thoughts are with you doll.

All of my family and many of my closest friends are still back home in Texas. It's just Manimal and I and the 2 little Hellspawn. Thanks for thinking of me though. It does help to have support from cool people like yourself.
*Hugs*


You guys Friggin Rule. It really does Help me feel less Alone in all of this.

It's a neverending Nightmare, and I spend WAY too much time in my head thinking about it all. It begins to unravel the nerves after awhile. Among other things.

Least I can still get on here at look at all the Boobies when I'm down..



Boobies=Good!!!!

[horrorgirl]

I'm really pissed of that an idiot like James Fey can publish a fake memoir and make millions off of it. If you are going to embellish facts,and lie, in order to get better sales for your biography then have the balls to admit it. This just proves that anybody can get published these days.Shame on the publishers for not checking facts.

However ,I do find it hysterical that Oprah and her worshipping zombies fell for it.

The Smoking Gun rocks. Here is their expose about the fraud:
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...amesfrey1.html

My Hugs to ya, E_P_S.

It sucks what you are going through, but your one strong and pretty lady. I know you will get through it all.

I'm here for yah hon. Much Love.

[edible_eye]

Originally Posted by urian

And no, Tstone, I am not attacking you but, YES, you did hit a nerve with that statement. You can feel proud you hit one of the only exposed nerves I have.

Fucking thanks for dredging up those memories for me.

not for nothing, but this pretty much sounds like tstone's errant analogy was taken way too personal - and for no real reason other than it being an episode you suffered. tstone didn't reference you.

i wasn't even part of this until i read your post, urian and my brows creased in confusion. how did you make the leap from tstone making one of his eloquent statements while trying to console e_p_s, to him having made said statement in order to snipe at you?

i can't make the connection in much the same way i still fail to make the connection as to why a certain member sniped at another certain member over citing sources for pork rind manufacturing...

as an aside - i'm sorry for the pain you and your family suffered, man. no one should lose family that way. i've lost a brother and it tore a hole out of me that's always left me wondering what life would be like if...

i'm sorry.

[ghostposts]

I'm sorry you're going through this, Eps. You deserve far better. I keep you in my thoughts daily.

Urian, and Edible, you too. I'm sorry for your losses.

Just keep coming here, and we'll keep hugging and praying.

Lots of love from the ghost.

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Thanks Heaps Ghost..
I know you relate with the daily battle. Some days I'm sure we both give new meaning to the words 'bitter' and 'jaded'.

*snort*

Which reminds me, I have a question to ask you. Check your pm's in a bit.

Eyes,

Thanks for the show of Unity Pretty One. It really helps. I'll even wear your S&M Strawberry Shortcake outfit for the imaginary Calendar..

*Hee*

Seriously Guys, you have no idea how much many of you lift me up and make me smile when I'm feeling so pain wracked I think I am going to go insane from the constant agony.

It means the world. I am truly Blessed to have such Sexzie and Supportive Friends..

Ass Grabs for All of You!!!

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y10...rs/big_hug.gif

[JuliaGaltic]

Originally Posted by Empty_Purple_Stars

All of my family and many of my closest friends are still back home in Texas. It's just Manimal and I and the 2 little Hellspawn. Thanks for thinking of me though. It does help to have support from cool people like yourself.
*Hugs*!!!!

Sincerely though, if you can think of anything I could do to help from way out here please, PLEASE don't hesitate to ask. Even if it's just researching something for you so you can just rest up and not sit at the computer or make phone calls. My stepmother got really sick once and she has 4 children of her own and I know how hard it was for her, even with my help, not being up to par physically and having 4 kids.

Seriously, anything at all please ask us. I can see that I'm not the only one who would do everything possible to help.

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Originally Posted by JuliaGaltic

Sincerely though, if you can think of anything I could do to help from way out here please, PLEASE don't hesitate to ask. Even if it's just researching something for you so you can just rest up and not sit at the computer or make phone calls. My stepmother got really sick once and she has 4 children of her own and I know how hard it was for her, even with my help, not being up to par physically and having 4 kids.

Seriously, anything at all please ask us. I can see that I'm not the only one who would do everything possible to help.

You're a real Doll..

Thank you so much for kindness. I am truly touched..

It is a perpetual struggle, and everytime I take 3 giant steps forward, it seems like my Body takes 6 Giant steps backwards. Maddening just isn't a big enough word.

These days I am forcing myself to take one day at a time, so I don't get overwhelmed. The even screwier part is that the Immunological disease Sjogrens Syndrome that I have, flares up under stress. Ironic eh? So I try not to focus on what is going to happen in the future, and I try my best to avoid things or people that make me more stressed out. That's easier said than done sometimes, but I'm trying.

I promise if I can think of anything I could use a hand with, I will let you know.

Really is sweet as Hell of you to care.

*Squeezy Hugs*

[JuliaGaltic]

From what I've read, you are a very strong, intelligent woman. Your children are lucky to have you for a mother. There is no doubt in my mind that you will make it through this.

*bear hug*

[urian]

Originally Posted by edible_eye

not for nothing, but this pretty much sounds like tstone's errant analogy was taken way too personal - and for no real reason other than it being an episode you suffered. tstone didn't reference you.

i wasn't even part of this until i read your post, urian and my brows creased in confusion. how did you make the leap from tstone making one of his eloquent statements while trying to console e_p_s, to him having made said statement in order to snipe at you?

i can't make the connection in much the same way i still fail to make the connection as to why a certain member sniped at another certain member over citing sources for pork rind manufacturing...

as an aside - i'm sorry for the pain you and your family suffered, man. no one should lose family that way. i've lost a brother and it tore a hole out of me that's always left me wondering what life would be like if...

i'm sorry.

Like I told tstone, I know he didnt do it as a snipe or for anything aimed to get under my skin.

I am a very stoic person. I keep most of my feelings under control and very well gaurded but sometimes, when I'm not watching, a nerve slips from beneath my armor.
It wasn't Tstone's post, per se, that got me so enflamed. It was a weird train of thought that connected the dots between car wreck, onlookers/rubber neckers and a few other choice words. That train then threw my soul and my ever stoic personality straight back to the day Sean died which in turn brought back all of the raw anger and emotion that I keep very well hidden most of then time. It exposed everything that I canhide on a day to day basis in a matter of miliseconds and that hurt to a degree I wont explain. In an instant I was back at the car. I upset myself to the point of shaking. I'm not going to go into this in anymore detail in person. It's not the time or place for this.

It's no foul against Tstone because I know his post wasn't driected at me. It was just the analogy that hit a nerve and those damned emotions bushwacking me to prove to me I am still human and the hurt is still there.

While you're handing out apologies, you might want to consider apologizing to our dear sweet and most beautiful moderator Empty_Purple_Stars who does not like her personal information displayed for all to see and potentially abuse - even if it's only a first name. Obviously she took care of the offense well enough on her own but do keep in mind that it is generally not acceptable to be handing out personal info on a public board without permission, which I'm confident in this case, was not given.