the Corrupted Wishes game

[Valerius]

Granted, but his herpes is special and your whole gym class, you included, also catch it and you all die.

I wish my cold was gone!

[kimaru]

Wish granted, but now you have SARS.

I wish my hair was blue again...

[GothicChristian]

Granted, but it all falls out the next day and never grows back and you become deathly allergic to all wigs.

I wish my mom was a better teacher.

[silverbaal]

You wake up next morning, go to school, college or high school, and she's the new teacher for a home ec class. She gets so good at teaching in general that she goes on a teaching spasm, teaching you how to do every little thing, even how to "properly" brush your teeth and go to the bathroom. Every day when you're in class, she recounts all of these stories to your peers.

How embarassing.

I wish the speakers on my computer were louder.

[grauenacht]

Your speakers get so loud that your head explodes and splatters gray matter all over your prettiest dress and ruins any baked goods in the area.

I wish I could build a robot who would become my best friend and would go on adventures with me.

[GothicChristian]

Granted, it malfunctions soon after you get it and kills you in the midst of your adventures.

I wish I was immortal.

[d.Nox]

Did you remember to wish for eternal youth, grasshopper?

I wish every school kid were thoroughly instructed in logic and reasoning.

[GothicChristian]

Granted, they take over the world as tyrants and you are forced to do their bidding.

I wish I had eternal youth.

[d.Nox]

Ever read "The Picture of Dorian Grey"? Eternal youth comes at the price of your soul, your humanity, and the corruption of everything you love.

I wish I had more dreams where I can fly.

EDIT: ...and fewer of the ones in the house with the tiny rooms.

[silverbaal]

You have a dream where you're flying . While you're dreaming, you are falling out of a plane in real life. But the dream is so good that you don't wake up. When you do wake up, you are deal and in your own hell; full of tiny rooms that go on for eternity.

I wish I had retractable claws.

[Valerius]

Granted, but your claws point inwards into your flesh, and the slightest provocation causes them to go into a retracting spree, reducing your fingers into bloody ribbons in the process.

I wish I could read peoples' minds at will!

[ApothoKeri]

Granted...

But every time that you read a mind, it ages you 11 years and as of this wish being granted, you will only live another 10 years.

I wish that I could travel back and forth in time and see whatever various world events that I choose unfold before my eyes, while easily being able to pop back home to my time and place as I see fit.

[(heartofflames)]

Granted, you are able to do so, yet every time you "pop in", there is no guarantee that you'll be invisible, and the number of years you travel is lost in the real world, so by the time you get back, there is no home to get back to....

I wish I were a better artist.

[Shadows_Jukebox]

granted....

but your art is that of a deepley tourtured soul, and your "artworks" often find themselves upon the bodys of murder victims.... your instanity grows, untill you could find no more perfect people to make into "art" so you turn on yourself... you become forgotten in the police files as the crazy person with a razor blade.

I wish I was more sucessful, better looking, funnier, richer, more talented, lived longer, smarter and a thousand times better than my childhood nemises.

[d.Nox]

Granted. Your life remains as it is, while theirs suddenly descend into spirals of failure, misery, and despair, culminating in their tortured suicides--all of which play out before your eyes. You are forever haunted by the accusing look on their faces as they die.

I wish my tattoo-fund jar were full of crisp, high-denomination bills.

[(heartofflames)]

Granted. Yet, they are Monopoly bills.

I wish I had photogenic memory, but only remember things I want to remember with no extraneous info.

[black_heart]

Granted... You get the power to have a photographic memory while awake, but when sleeping you dream of all the bad things that have happened in your life.

I wish I was beautiful.

[d.Nox]

Oh, you are, dahling! It's just too bad that nobody else has good enough taste to notice, being too busy goggling over the latest plastic Hollywood bimbo.

I wish real life was like a Weird Tales story.

[biohazard]

Granted. But then everything that happens to you is fake, and your life becomes simple and pointless. You get tired of it and kill yourself.

I wish my dog could talk.

[Nevan]

Granted - your dog can talk but now it insults and swears at you 24/7.

I wish I had an iPhone.

[GenniferBone]

Granted- now you just have to get out from the center of the sun.

I wish for more clothes! (I'm a shallow, shallow, boi)

[Valerius]

Granted, you get all the gothiest clothes you could ever want, but they are 4 sizes too small and they come in an avalanch from the sky that smooshes your house.

I wish I could absorb any information I want from books just by putting them under my pillow while I sleep at night.

[PersephoneX]

Granted...but with each book you head grown 6 inches...

I wish it was warmer.

[silverbaal]

Said global warming melts all of the ice caps in one week and floods the earth, making America the new Florence.

It's warmer. Stop complaining.

I wish I could teleport to other dimensions.

[(heartofflames)]

Granted, but you teleport into a dimension of cannibals...and you're stark naked.

I wish I could kill at will.