the Corrupted Wishes game

[maggot]

Granted. But this dimension has odd physics, and, well... You fall off.

I wish I WAS invincible.

[Godslayer Jillian]

If my universe is a mobius strip, I'd fall onto itself

Anyway, granted...

You become invincible, but you still feel pain.

I wish I weren't afraid of needles.

[maggot]

good point

Granted. You're not afraid of needles, but you're afraid of everything else.

I wish I was attractive.

[Godslayer Jillian]

Granted. You become attractive, but I become even more attractive and every woman wants me and no one else.
Heh.

I wish I had more ideas for wishes.

[maggot]

You bastard! At least I get all the gay dudes in Texas that are twice my age! (I really do. They always hit on me)

Granted. But the makers of Pee Wee's Playhouse sue you for stealing the idea from one of the episodes.

I wish that I was amphibious.

[Cicero]

Granted. But toxic chemicals seep through your delicate skin and not only do you sprout three extra legs, you die soon afterwards from pain and more pain.

I wish I had been born 140 years ago, and that the current date was 1879 (so I wouldn't be dead yet! Hah!). Oh and an evening with Oscar Wilde would be nice, too.

[six_inch_heels]

Granted, but Oscar Wilde thinks you are mad and dangerous and you are taken to a mental ward where you spend the rest of your life staring at the ceiling.

I wish I knew what I was doing in maths :S

[spookypurple]

An aside....

I don't know what it says about me, but you guys keep corrupting my wishes in such glorious ways, that I'm left feeling very warm & fuzzy... Hmmm.....

[Draconysius]

six_inch_heels:

Granted, but you understand it so well that you're upgraded to college, and you do so friggin' well there that the government gets you and scrapes your brain out with a spoon for all the stoopid people to stare at in the Smithsonian. Thank goth me not stoopud?? me am smarterer than all;

me wish me could speak betterer

[Magpie_Tendencies]

Granted.

You can speak perfect netspeak and you do so in all your daily conversations. Your friends all hate you and you become a God for trolls.

I wish it were July.

[maggot]

Granted. It's July, but it's July in a post-apocalyptic wasteland where it's 10,000 degrees farenheit. You die of being baked to death.

I wish all my on-line friends moved near me.

[mutsumiasakura]

Heh, me too. Unfortunately for you, they do. All of them move very near you .... into your bathroom. You can't take a shower anymore because it is so crowded in there, and slowly die of bad hygiene.

I wish I could take a nice, long nap.

[WizardElement5]

You do. You sleep for ten thousand years and when you awake the human race has evolved to a stage whereby they regard you as an historic savage and you are kept as a public exhibit and fed on strawberries and chocolate.

I wish I had my own time machine.

[NachtSorcier]

Granted. You fuck up and are sent right to the middle of the Civil War, where you are promptly gunned down.

I wish my moustache wasn't so hard to manage.

[Crom Crauch]

Granted, but it becomes sentient, and decides that it wishes to live on someone elses lip.

I wish there were more pants in this world

[maggot]

Granted, but none of them fit you.

I wish I was tall, and had a normal build.

[angel_dark_demon_bright]

Granted. But now your face resembles that of a creepy child's doll. Like chucky, but uglier.

I wish I could fly.

[roserougesang]

You can fly. On one of your first flights you fly straight into a closed window. Splat! What a clumsy angel....

I wish I knew what Shakespeare's lost play was about.

[Cicero]

Granted. Turns out it sucked. Damn.

I wish I could study for my exams instead of procrastinating constantly.

[Morrigan_Dubh]

Granted. You constantly study for your exams, but never turn up to take them. Then you die of starvation due the to lack of sustenance to be gained from study.

I wish I could find a great book to read, y'know those ones that are so good you spend your day waiting to get the time to read it.

[angel011]

Granted, but your pet likes that book, too -- likes to play with it, so the book gets ripped to shreds before you get the chance to read more than first three chapters.

I wish I had wings.

[Magpie_Tendencies]

Granted.

You have wings. They are old, shrivelled wings that cannot fly and look really bad. You find your new wings utterly repulsive and you spend the rest of your days trying to cover the wings so no one else will see them.

I wish I had a cat.

[WizardElement5]

Granted, but the cat plays the piano so badly, you have to spend lots of money giving it music lessons. (However, the cat is a great chef and fixes you some really tasty meals, so you don't mind too much).

I wish that space aliens would land on Earth and teach us all some fab out of this world new dances.

[Nike]

Granted. After a while they get bored and decide to eat us all.

I wish I wasn't so tired and could concentrate on painting.

[Kinflame]

Granted, but, uhm, Satan takes your soul!

Creative, no?

I wish there was actually someone cool in Bethesda.