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Whining This forum is for general whining. Please post all suicide threats, complaints about significant others, and statements about how unfair school is to this board.

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Old 04-12-2007, 10:20 PM   #3601
PersephoneX
 
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I'm going to take on a little job at a computer shop for R300 less than i'm earning now. But i need to pay off my student loan...And i can't stay here. They destroyed my confidence in myself and i wana get out before its too late.

Also...I'm moving in with my ferret on tuesday. So i have to pack...and be ready to go at 7:30am. My parents are going to kill me.
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It's not so much the pain
It's more the actual knife
Pretending the picture is perfect
I cut myself to sleep
I close my eyes for a second
And curse my fragile soul
I scream to hide that I'm lonely
The echo calls my name

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Old 04-12-2007, 10:27 PM   #3602
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PersephoneX
I'm going to take on a little job at a computer shop for R300 less than i'm earning now. But i need to pay off my student loan...And i can't stay here. They destroyed my confidence in myself and i wana get out before its too late.

Also...I'm moving in with my ferret on tuesday. So i have to pack...and be ready to go at 7:30am. My parents are going to kill me.
Best of luck on your elopement! How romantic! And...this is none of my beeswax but...try not to get pregnant before you and your ferret are ready.
So you can keep working off your student loan and get out of debt. Sorry if I am coming off like I am talking to you like your parents, I just want to see you happy.

Let us know how the "Great Escape" goes!
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Old 04-12-2007, 10:32 PM   #3603
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PersephoneX
I'm going to take on a little job at a computer shop for R300 less than i'm earning now. But i need to pay off my student loan...And i can't stay here. They destroyed my confidence in myself and i wana get out before its too late.

Also...I'm moving in with my ferret on tuesday. So i have to pack...and be ready to go at 7:30am. My parents are going to kill me.
Yeah, I could never figure out whether Ferret is an actual ferret, or if that is a pet name for a boy. I think I wanted to assume it was an actual ferret because some of the things you used to say you do with your ferret, and my imagining it was a pet, led me to believe that you were joking around and that would make me laugh.

Anyhow, good luck with that. What is R300? You shouldn't feel a loss of self confidence because someone was a jerk to you. You should know that you will never allow that to happen again, and move forward. Sometimes, you have to lose a bit to gain much more. It's a leap of faith, because you don't know what will happen, but good things can happen, for sure. I know just how you feel about your job right now, and I left mine for one that paid even less than what I was making. But mgmt at my new job appreciated my work ethic, (unless my old jerk-off employers who LOVED to use people), and I was able to move up quickly and am now getting almost 5k more in a decent position and in very relaxed environment. My pal got fired our job, but now she is pursuing her dreams and seemingly getting somewhere as a dancer. See where I'm going w/ this encouragement? You will feel different soon. Nothing's permanent.

Oh, and yeah, there's nothing you can do about your parents soon to be had sh*t fit. They're going to miss you!
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Old 04-12-2007, 10:38 PM   #3604
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And now, I must sleep. My eyes hurt. Will talk at you later. Good luck..
:-( :-)
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Old 04-12-2007, 10:42 PM   #3605
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Oh. And my ferret is a person...
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It's not so much the pain
It's more the actual knife
Pretending the picture is perfect
I cut myself to sleep
I close my eyes for a second
And curse my fragile soul
I scream to hide that I'm lonely
The echo calls my name

*ANIMAL CRACKERS*

http://www.myspace.com/persephone_x
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Old 04-13-2007, 06:34 AM   #3606
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PersephoneX
Oh. And my ferret is a person...
Heh heh, now I know. Let us know how it goes!
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Old 04-13-2007, 07:51 PM   #3607
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I'm feeling rather grumpy and I'm not sure why. Could it be that I've had 3 glasses of wine and I still have no buzz? Stupid alcohol tolerance level.
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Old 04-13-2007, 07:54 PM   #3608
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrs.wes straker
I'm feeling rather grumpy and I'm not sure why.
::slips Mrs. Straker's shoes off and proceeds to give platonic but relaxing foot massage::
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Old 04-13-2007, 08:00 PM   #3609
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Thank you kind sir. *Sighs with relief*
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Old 04-14-2007, 10:34 AM   #3610
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My steamer is broken :'( How inconvienient. Oh well. Perhaps the store I bought it from will allow me to exchange it.
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Holding you tied, holding you tied... and I feel so happy.
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Old 04-14-2007, 11:03 AM   #3611
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I'm SO PISSED OFF. I don't even know where to start. I'm going to go fucking drown in a bucket of Gin. I admire and respect women, more so then men but I'm this close to being Jack the ripper right now.
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Old 04-14-2007, 11:03 AM   #3612
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mir
I'm SO PISSED OFF. I don't even know where to start. I'm going to go fucking drown in a bucket of Gin.
Bombay Sapphire is good.
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Old 04-14-2007, 11:05 AM   #3613
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I'm not going to get over this for years so I might as well try some of that and see if it helps any.
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Old 04-14-2007, 11:17 AM   #3614
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mir
I'm not going to get over this for years so I might as well try some of that and see if it helps any.
What happs?
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Old 04-14-2007, 11:20 AM   #3615
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian
I frequent another forum, and another guy (with the IQ of an eggplant) asked me what the hell am I doing in the computer which is a capitalist device and I'm an anarchist?
You should explain to him that your computer does not have any political opinions at all. It is made of metal and plastic and stuff. I doubt that he eschews food or clothing just because in the particular world in which we happen to live, the food and clothing that come to him do so by way of capitalist institutions.

Quote:
Second: Has he never heard of Anarcho-capitalism?
And Third: Since when is capitalism a form of government?
I better not use the term laissez-faire around him or his head will explode.
The mainstream of anarchy (hah, that cracks me up) is opposed to capitalism because it is coercive both in theory (via a voracious view of personal property) and in practice. Anarcho-capitalism is a form of anarchism in the generic, history-independant, dictionary sense of the word. However, it really is an animal of a very different color than what we are normally referring to when we talk about "anarchism."

True-blooded anarchism isn't just about fighting one particular form of coercion (the state). It's about categorically eliminating violence and hierarchy from human relationships.

Drake
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Old 04-14-2007, 03:18 PM   #3616
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Why must people sleep?!?!?!?! I don't want to go to bed, but I feel I might pass out soon. :S

But seriously, why? Our brains do not get anything from it; they are still in constant motion, turning over and over again, coming up with dreams from our subconscious in order to tell us something, which is most of the time encrypted.
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Old 04-14-2007, 04:00 PM   #3617
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Shyantra, I've wondered about that as well. I've read up on it, and could've given you the scientific answer if it hadn't been for the fact that I'm so hyper at the moment I hardly can concentrate on anything. Blame the pot of black tea, tense nerves and my exam...! *hums the Time Warp for no apparent reason and wonders why typing goes so quickly in this state of mind compared to my usual lazy self* Gods, I feel like going "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" and dancing around on the living room floor.
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Old 04-14-2007, 04:06 PM   #3618
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Care to lend me some of your energy Minyaliel? lol
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Old 04-14-2007, 04:10 PM   #3619
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You sleep because your body, not your brain, needs to.

Now for my rant:

I am about to graduate high school, something I am very proud of, like beyond all belief proud. (I almost fucked myself up in my sophmore year)

As I look at the people I leave behind, one in particular has come to stand out over the past year. As in, the (excuse the language) fucking bitch needs to get her ass handed to her, and if she keeps fucking pushing my buttons, it's going to be me who does it!

She is a freshman, and she is one of the most irritating people I've ever met in my eighteen years!

Now, I am in the drama program, a techie by choice. (I could act, but have no desire to) She is an actress. She is rather firm in her belief that she is the best actress, the best singer, and the most important person in the group. Now, I'll give her credit where it's due; she has a decent singing voice, and she can . . . well, at least she remembers most of her lines. However, we have far better actors, better singers, better dancers, etc. Her constant, undeserved arrogance is getting on my one last nerve and I'm ready to knock her flat on her ass until she gets brought down a peg or two!

Her next quality: I have a good friend who is Puerto Rican. Note: I said Puerto Rican. The wench though, insists on calling my friend Mexican! She is not Mexican! She's Puerto Rican! There's a difference!

Also, she seems to feel we care about her outside life. We're not friends with her, we don't. But she continues to broadcast her personal problems, from speaking at top volume into her cell phone in the middle of the stage, to bringing her boyfriend to rehearsals (A major no-no) and fighting with him there. She then proceeds to rant and rave to people who both a.) honestly don't care about her juvenile BS and b.) really need quiet because they're trying to paint a straight line on a canvas while standing on a wobbly ladder.

She also seems to be unable to comprehend the phrases "be quiet, please" "be quiet damn it" "shut up you moron" and "if you do not become silent in the next two seconds, I'm going to throw a paint brush at you, you fucking whore!" Even when you throw the paint brush! (waves arms dramatically) Then she complains for two hours about how you hit her with a paint brush! (I warned you damn it!)

I've never been so thankful that in two months, I will never have to see her again. To my younger friends, I'm very sorry you have to deal with her still. (Friends cry)

Now I'm done. Thank you for allowing me to rant.
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Old 04-14-2007, 04:18 PM   #3620
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shyantra
Care to lend me some of your energy Minyaliel? lol
Sure! I've got plenty of it tonight, it seems - too bad that I've been hired to sing tomorrow early morning because I guess I'll be horribly tired then
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Whatever words I say I will always love you
I will always love you


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Old 04-15-2007, 10:02 AM   #3621
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I'm not ok.

I really don't know what else to say, mostly because I don't understand what's going on. I know I'm hysterical for no reason, I know I can't stop crying, I know I couldn't get myself out of bed for the last 2 days so I missed work. I don't understand why. I cry, hourly, daily, and I don't know why.

I'm not ok.

I have tried every coping mechanism I know. I have tried "self-soothe", which involves soothing all 5 of my senses and relaxing. I have tried going out, hanging out with people, taking my mind off it, keeping busy. I have tried sewing and painting and creating. I have tried exercising, I worked out for 2 hours and couldn't walk the next day in hopes that the endorphins would make feel even slightly better. I even tried letting myself mope, to see if acknowledging it and indulging it would get it out of my system. Nothing works. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm just... not ok.
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Old 04-15-2007, 06:59 PM   #3622
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Saddiction: Ahh, nothing has happened yet!

DHD: Instead of trying to work it out or fix it/cope with it, have you tried identifying the source of your distress?
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Old 04-15-2007, 07:50 PM   #3623
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DarkHeartedDemoness
I'm not ok.

I really don't know what else to say, mostly because I don't understand what's going on. I know I'm hysterical for no reason, I know I can't stop crying, I know I couldn't get myself out of bed for the last 2 days so I missed work. I don't understand why. I cry, hourly, daily, and I don't know why.

I'm not ok.

I have tried every coping mechanism I know. I have tried "self-soothe", which involves soothing all 5 of my senses and relaxing. I have tried going out, hanging out with people, taking my mind off it, keeping busy. I have tried sewing and painting and creating. I have tried exercising, I worked out for 2 hours and couldn't walk the next day in hopes that the endorphins would make feel even slightly better. I even tried letting myself mope, to see if acknowledging it and indulging it would get it out of my system. Nothing works. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm just... not ok.
Do you have professional help? You sound like you might be past the point of self help, or help from friends and family. This sounds like severe depression.
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Old 04-15-2007, 08:21 PM   #3624
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DHD...
Awww. Sweetheart. You sound like you need a really big hug and some help. It does sound like you're past the point of self-help, like Ms. Straker said. I think you should go see a professional, if just to be reassured that you can get out of it. Right now though, stay away from potentially dangerous objects and try to think positively. I'm sending huge hugs over.
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Old 04-16-2007, 03:32 AM   #3625
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I love you DHD. ::hug::

I used to feel like that too, crying at work even. Now a Lexapro pill a day keeps the blues away.
Try and see the doctor, mine made a huge difference in my life by giving me the prescription to help my seratonin. Wow, what a difference, night and day.
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