Acceptable age difference to date?

NightmareInShiningArmour · 05-17-2009, 09:42 PM

I don't mean 30 year olds to 50 year olds, I'm talking 14-16 or so dating 18-20 year old people.
Acceptable?
In Australia it's illegal to do anything physical at this age but eh.
What do you guys reckon?

Saya · 05-17-2009, 09:47 PM

General rule of age differences: If the younger is at least half your age plus seven, its not creepy. Anything below is creepy. An eighteen year old can date someone who's at least 16 without it being creepy, and a 20 year old can date someone who's at least 17. However I wouldn't need an equation to be able to tell you that a 20 year old dating a 14 year old is pretty creepy.

Beneath the Shadows · 05-17-2009, 09:52 PM

It's only creepy if you let it be creepy. Unless one of the partners is below the age of consent. Then, whether or not it's creepy is debatable, but it is illegal, so...

NightmareInShiningArmour · 05-17-2009, 10:02 PM

Thanks guys.
What about a 15yo dating a 19yo?

Saya · 05-17-2009, 10:08 PM

It really depends on the two people involved, I think. Whats the age of consent there?

NightmareInShiningArmour · 05-17-2009, 10:14 PM

Generally 16 years old, but upon researching, in my state it's 17.
How does it depend?

Godslayer Jillian · 05-17-2009, 10:34 PM

Yeah, how does it? Creepy is creepy.

ArchLich · 05-17-2009, 11:11 PM

Well, lets view it like this:

Laws are put in place for the best interests of the "majority" population. In this case meaning that a 14y/o dating a 20y/o, in a senario based on your average person of those ages, would be kinda creepy. However, I truly believe that the "creepiness" level should be determined in terms of maturity, rather than a number. For example, I happen to know a 15y/o whom is more mature than your average 30y/o, so if she were to date a 20y/o, I wouldnt think it's creepy, as a matter of fact, I would understand her intentions, since most guys her age are WAY too immature for her to tolerate.

In conclusion, laws are meant to be followed by the average, and broken by the superior.

Godslayer Jillian · 05-17-2009, 11:13 PM

I agree with most of that, but the last sentence is too fucking conceited.

ArchLich · 05-17-2009, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

I agree with most of that, but the last sentence is too fucking conceited.

Perhaps, I guess I could have worded it differently. I'll just give an example instead. An old lady is driving down the road at speed limit. Then you see a professional street racer doing 10 miles over. Is the street racer being dangerous? No, because he has the skill to do so without being wreckless.

Saya · 05-17-2009, 11:36 PM

I did used to know a girl who at the time was fifteen and went out with an older guy, I think he was eighteen or nineteen, she was really mature and you wouldn't have said she was fifteen. Of course, not too many fifteen year olds were like her and at the time the age of consent in Canada was 14 anyway, it was raised to 16 a year ago but there is still an exception, if they are within a five year range its okay.

SiouxsiePernova · 05-18-2009, 07:16 AM

In most cases, I think that the difference in maturity between a 15-year-old and a 19-year-old would be far too large.

isobel black · 05-18-2009, 08:00 AM

I love that formula, Saya!

I had my first boyfriend when I was 14, he was 18. Although I've always thought that was just on the safe side of creepy, looking back it was quite a big age difference, mainly because he was on a whole other level of sexual maturity.

Tam Li Hua · 05-18-2009, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SiouxsiePernova

In most cases, I think that the difference in maturity between a 15-year-old and a 19-year-old would be far too large.

I tend to agree. Also, I would suggest that if both parties are not of legal age to date, that they wait until it -is- legal. Until then, try hanging out and getting to know each other. If it's meant to be, it'll happen. =)

JCC · 05-18-2009, 08:26 AM

I don't give a shit. If it's consensual then it's not my business.

Underwater Ophelia · 05-18-2009, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JCC

I don't give a shit. If it's consensual then it's not my business.

That's sort of foolish.
Not everyone is in a position to give consent.

The Count · 05-18-2009, 09:34 AM

The old people around here have a saying that a girl should date a guy 5 years older than her, because it takes a guy 5 years longer to mature.
hahaha.

Pyre · 05-18-2009, 10:46 AM

My brother was 16 and dated a 12-13 year old and had sex with her. I thought that was pretty fucked up, but more fucked up than that is that she lost her virginity at 11, and she is about average for her age. Even if it was only a 3 year age difference, that gap seems enormous when you're young, especially if you're sexually active with that person. Even at 21 I still want to keep a small gap between me and the age of my other simply because of difference of interests seem more pronounced, and I also don't want to date someone who is just entering college or has already graduated since their lives are more affected than someone who is idly awaiting graduation in a couple of years. To me, relationships at many young ages feel most comfortable with no more than a 2-year gap and seem less peculiar that way, but that's a personal preference: some people say less, others say more.

Minyaliel · 05-18-2009, 01:44 PM

Well, my boyfriend'll be 18 this august. I'm 21. I don't think that's creepy. It felt a bit weird at first, but it isn't creepy.

Haunted House · 05-18-2009, 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JCC

I don't give a shit. If it's consensual then it's not my business.

Dude, I agree. As long as people know what they're doing and there is no malicious intent then what the hell is the problem?

Sinjob · 05-18-2009, 02:07 PM

..Can't speak for everyone but personally I couldn't imagine dating someone more than a year younger than me. For me it'd be too damn awkward.

Pyre · 05-18-2009, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Minyaliel

Well, my boyfriend'll be 18 this august. I'm 21. I don't think that's creepy. It felt a bit weird at first, but it isn't creepy.

I wouldn't call it creepy unless a 30+ year old was dating a teenager. Anything else is just awkward, but not creepy.

Godslayer Jillian · 05-18-2009, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JCC

I don't give a shit. If it's consensual then it's not my business.

This is not an appeal to absurdity, I'm just curious; what's your opinion of NAMBLA then?

JCC · 05-18-2009, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

This is not an appeal to absurdity, I'm just curious; what's your opinion of NAMBLA then?

I think it's a good organisation. Not sure why the Man/Boy thing is important any more though, they may as well just be a general sexual liberation movement.

Delkaetre · 05-18-2009, 03:05 PM

When I was 19, my boyfriend was 28.
We went out for a year, we got along great. Things came to a slow and natural conclusion, and we're still good friends.

(n/2)+7 where n=age is useful, but by no means a definition. Sometimes you just get on really well with people who happen to be a fair bit older than you.

I'm now 21 and my current Gent is 26, and we're in the offensively public cuddling/ groping phase.