Another story snippet.

[L'Oiseau Noir]

Gabriel awoke to the steady patter of morning rain. He was sweating, and for some reason he felt drained of energy, even though he had been asleep for nearly half of a day. He ached, mostly in his shoulders and legs from having flailed about in his sleep (he deduced this from the crumpled sheets beneath him, which were twisted and pell-mell), and his blood red hair stuck up in all sorts of directions. A dull pain throbbed from the back of his head, and when he reached behind him to analyze what it was, he felt a rather bulbous bump on the back of his skull. Undoubtedly the result of having smacked his head, hard, against the metal headboard.

This was the sixth night he had had those strange dreams. In it, he recalled a girl in a blue jumper, whose face seemed to stare at him from a million miles away behind a translucent curtain of white fog. He remembered, vividly, the girl’s dark and almost supernatural gaze, her ebon hair, and her pale, doll-like face. She wanted something, too, from him, something very important. And for some reason, deep down, he somehow knew what that “something important” was. When he tried to remember, however, he drew a blank, and his head started to pound. He decided to let it lie for the time being, as it was stupid to mull over something as inane as an abstract dream. In time, he was sure it would come to him.

It's yet another lovely Silent Hill fiction (I'm sorry I'm so obsessive about it, forgive me everyone), but this time it's for a big writing project for my Honors English III Class.

Civil Feedback welcomed. =)

[PutridLily]

I love the imagery. Again, very atmospheric. I usually try to avoid using brackets as it seems to interrupt the flow, but nevertheless if you want to keep that extra part in there, that’s probably the best way to do it. So I’ll just shut up now …I wouldn't change it, I enjoy reading your writing.

[L'Oiseau Noir]

Originally Posted by PutridLily

I love the imagery. Again, very atmospheric. I usually try to avoid using brackets as it seems to interrupt the flow, but nevertheless if you want to keep that extra part in there, that’s probably the best way to do it. So I’ll just shut up now …I wouldn't change it, I enjoy reading your writing.

Aw, you don't know how happy that makes me to hear someone who enjoys reading my amateur dribbles of literary funk. It really does make my day! =)

Thank you so much for taking a little slice of your time to check it out!

Now, if only I could get that novel rolling.... *sauntered off, mumbling incoherently to herself*

[L'Oiseau Noir]

Exhaustedly, Gabriel swung his legs over the side of his bed and lifted his slim, seventeen-year-old frame from the creaky mattress. He edged towards his mirror and took a moment to examine his face: red eyeshadow was smeared around his eyes, and his eyeliner had long since faded away. He grimaced and picked up some make-up remover from his dresser, applying it to his eyes and gently wiping away the smudgy mess with a stained cloth. Once his make-up was stripped, Gabriel reapplied the eyeliner, giving it a little flick, and a bit of eyeshadow which he carefully brushed over his eyelids using a cotton swab. When he was finished, he decided to indulge in a little vanity and admire his reflection. He wasn’t too shabby looking of a guy: he had cat green eyes, which girls adored, pale skin, and a toned, athletic build. His hair, which he’d dyed a bright red, swept over his left eye, and he had a variety of piercings ranged from the lip, to the eyebrow, to his ears.

As Gabriel continued to study his reflection, the strangest thing happened. His image distorted, unless he was seeing things, and briefly he glimpsed a girl much like the one he’d seen in his dreams. The image became clearer and clearer, and there, as if standing in another world, the very girl, who quietly besought Gabriel in his dreams, appeared.

Gabriel sprang backward, startled. “It’s you!” he cried, pointing at the mirror.

The silent girl creepily tilted her head to the right and put her hand on the mirror, palm facing Gabriel. Behind her, the image of Gabriel’s room began to distort and deteriorate as pieces of the ceiling fell away, or parts of the walls began to peel back.

“What the hell is happening…” Gabriel looked around him and noticed that his room was rotting away like its reflection. Beneath him the floorboards dissolved into a rusty grating, stained with dry blood, and somewhere in the encroaching darkness a siren resonated.

Without any sign of stopping, the growing darkness continued to devour his room and strip the very reality around him, changing it into a twisted fairytale world. Gabriel gawked in horror as the grim scenery enveloped him: his dressers, chairs, all of his furniture, became lost in the bowels of the caliginosity.

“Stop this!” he yelled at the girl in the mirror. Gabriel made a full turn to see what had become of his room. There was nothing there anymore, save his bed, which was nothing more than a stiff, bloodstained cot, and his television, which was staticky. Everything else was made of metal and covered with blood and thick, bumpy layers of rust.

I simply felt like posting more of the story. To those of you who actually, amazingly, enjoyed the first two paragraphs, this is for you. =)