Gnet in the End of Days

[Versus]

Originally Posted by CuckooTuli

I also would love this. Although if my function is purely "recipient of Versus-inflicted smackdown", appropriate vengeance will be extracted when I get my finger out on Gnet in the X-Men 'Verse.

Don't pretend like you wouldn't be tickled even if it was.

[CuckooTuli]

NEVER!...

... okay, you got me.

[MissCheyenne]

Fear me and my unrelenting uppercuts of paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain!!!!!!!!!!!

[Apathy's_Child]

Originally Posted by Versus

Oh. CuckooTuli and I are destined to fight, someday.

Wait, are you talking about that time you guys almost, kinda had an argument about violence in protests, then had the same discussion 6 months later and wound up agreeing?

If so - the FUCK am I supposed to do with that? Awesome - I guess I'll just have your characters exchange a couple of polite almost-bitchslaps before yelling "FUCK YOUR (EQUALLY VALID) POINT OF VIEW", and walking away with a newfound respect for one another's personhood.

Jesus, Gnet. You're killing me here. Has it really come to this?


EDIT: Cuckoo & MC - I'll probably get bored eventually, but you've got a couple more installments before that becomes an immediate possibility. Meantime, pro-tip: that fishing for compliments jibe? Totally. I'm not gonna lie, the shine wore off writing the Zombopocalypse once people stopped posting their comments and just took the weekly awesomeness for granted. (Yes, I am a giant child about writing kudos. It's part of being fundamentally full of myself. I've learned to live with it.)

[CuckooTuli]

Originally Posted by Apathy's_Child

Wait, are you talking about that time you guys almost, kinda had an argument about violence in protests, then had the same discussion 6 months later and wound up agreeing?

If so - the FUCK am I supposed to do with that? Awesome - I guess I'll just have your characters exchange a couple of polite almost-bitchslaps before yelling "FUCK YOUR (EQUALLY VALID) POINT OF VIEW", and walking away with a newfound respect for one another's personhood.

Jesus, Gnet. You're killing me here. Has it really come to this?

Son, if you keep that up I will love-bomb the shit out of you.

Also: noted. You're a special and unique snowflake, more End of Days pls

[Murder.Of.Crows]

I was contemplating whether or not to post a meme here. I decided against it, because I'm to lazy. Anyways the gist was, one being http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jh1rpjlw8xA ,
the second was Versus in a:
I'm not always in fan fic's, but when I am, I'm always the badass.


Anyways, keep up the fan fics man. They make everything awesome... or some shit.

[Fruitbat]

Originally Posted by Apathy's_Child

Kind of scraping it for conflict here. Who hates who around here these days?

Lets see... everyone thinks I'm stupid. I clash terribly, like orange and green, with AshleyO, because he thinks I make every thread about me (but where is the fun in not causing a shitstorm in a blender?) and Alan is convinced I'm a victim.

Versus thinks I'm really stupid or chasing after his virtues or boots. Saya isn't talking to me because I pushed too much on veganism, and Sol is not around at the moment because she's moving so I'd have to say she doesn't like me because I'm against cupcake cruelty.

But this all was awhile ago... but I can go get involved in some serious debate again and stir up the hornet's nest - because I like to be stung.

Plus, I'm still chasing Ape, because she is such a lust worthy goddess....

Oh and CT could see how I was friggin' annoying as dog shit between your toes....

Have I imagined enough conflict for you?

Make me a demon and get me splattered somewhere or other... Oh I could be squashed between Ashley's toes... that would be fun :-D

[AshleyO]

If you want villains, there's Deviant, Deadman, KissMeGently, and Pothead.

Then there's the heros that die as villains such as myself and Despanan. Interesting twist there. Especially if you work in Pothead, you've got something with my anti-theism that starts out as a good thing but leads me down a path of becoming a monster. And of course Despanan could perhaps believe or for some time be working with the good guys but ultimately bringing in his own demise by not knowing where to go from a certain point.

The best villains are the ones you sympathize with.

Other than that, the landscape of G.net has changed a lot. The old guard is pretty much gone.

[Apathy's_Child]

Ah, sweet conflict.

Can you point me at the highlights, threadwise? I've been in & out for a while. Deadman is already cast, and I forgot about Deviant, but I'm assuming you're referring to KissMeDeadly - what happened there?

Pothead kind of bores me, but I guess the threads fit the whole theological element... we'll see.

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Apathy's_Child

I'm assuming you're referring to KissMeDeadly - what happened there?

Gun Control thread, says combat veterans are privileged fucks only a step below trust fund kids.

[Apathy's_Child]

Cut back to the flat where Sol, Miss C & Versus are sitting around the table, inebriated but not yet sloppy. The bottle sits empty between them and Miss C is opening another.

VERSUS: It’s great to see you guys.

SOL: Been a long time, huh?

VERSUS: Sure has.

SOL: [looking at him meaningfully] Two years.

VERSUS: [shrugging evasively] Been busy. Demon numbers’ve been rising, as you know. Which is why you called me.

SOL: Oh, we know it, all right. [pours them all another grimly, steeling to deliver bad news] They got Kontan last month.

VERSUS: [pause] Who is Kontan?

MISS C: Dude who used to troll the demons around here – one who was assigned as our Council contact when Sol and I first moved here? With all the hair?

VERSUS: Aw, with the cheekbones? No way!

MISS C: [sadly] Yep. He’s gone now.

VERSUS: MotherFUCKER. I loved that guy.

MISS C: [wistfully] I know. Total tragedy. He was too fuckin’ pretty to die like that... [shakes herself] But yeah, Kontan’s no more. Some demons attacked him – they found about a pretty corpse’s worth of blood, but the rest of the body was gone. [shrugs] Eh, can’t say I’m surprised. I’d’ve prob’ly taken it with me too...

SOL: [clearing throat as MC’s eyes begin to mist over again] ANYWAY... [looks at Versus, more or less straight, although the whiskey is starting to show] Since you haven’t kept in contact with anyone but us since Mexico [he evades her stare], we should probably fill you in on what’s been happening with us. You might have quit the Council out of nowhere like a freak [looks at him meaningfully], but some big shit is going down. We need you in on this.

VERSUS: [hands up] Hey, you don’t have to sell me here. If it’s demon-related, I’m in. Spill.

SOL: As you know, the demons’ numbers have been increasing – and we also told you why. The End of Days prophecy that’s been brought to the Council’s attention. “When the human race can fall no further, the last Prophet will speak with God’s voice, and the Gates of Hell will open. Demons –“

VERSUS: [impatiently] “Demons will pour forth and the Devil himself will walk the Earth one last time, gathering the souls of damned. When the world has been purged of evil, God will cast Satan back down into Hell along with the wicked, while Paradise reigns above for all eternity.” You told me this part over the phone already. So what are we DOING about it?

SOL: Um, you’re giving me a minute, ‘cause I’m about to tell you some stuff you DON’T know and it’s kind of fucking IMPORTANT. [as he settles back with a huff] The demons have been out in force lately. We aren’t certain why. But what we do know is, they’ve been targeting COUNCIL members. And not just hunters – theology academics, lab geeks... everyone they managed to tie to the Council. Kontan wasn’t the first, or the last.

VERSUS: [eyes clouding over with confusion] Who is Kontan?

MISS C: Pretty. Hair. [snaps like a piranha, grinning sharkishly]

VERSUS: [snapping out of it] Oh yeah. [shakes head, double-taking] Wait - what did you just say, before? The demons managed to hit the COUNCIL? As in, the SUPER-SECRET ORGANISATION fronted by an academic research funding committee, dedicated to the study and eradication of DEMONS? The fuck did they even find you?! People like us live their whole LIVES in hiding!

SOL: [grimly] We don’t know. Until a couple of months ago, no Council member’s security had been breached in over three hundred years. We’re too good at what we do. Thing is though, the demons know about the End of Days prophecy too – so obviously, they’re all fuckin’ gung-ho to overrun the earth when the Gates open. And it’s like they’re getting stronger off their own fervour. They’ve hit us so hard, the Council can barely function – just when the world needs us more than ever, they’ve got us all in freakin’ HIDING. [pause] V, man... everyone’s scared. Including us, and I count myself a fucking hardass. [looks to MC, who is now running her hand over Versus’s shaven head curiously, for agreement – MC nods with equal fervour before resuming her stroking] But here we are... hiding out like some goddamn CIVILIANS. [sits backs and looks at him determinedly] I know something went down on that last gig we did together in Mexico three years ago, right before you quit. And I’m not gonna ask you about it. [holds up hands as he looks away] You don’t wanna share – it’s fine. After the things we’ve seen, I can understand that. [pause] But... you’re still needed here. There are just too fucking many of them - we need all hands on deck here. So you need to make your peace with whatever happened out there in that desert, and help us save the fucking world already. [pause] You remember what we used to say before Mexico? Back when we were young and invincible and stupid as FUCK? [remembering, he finally smirks] You don’t let the world end. Anything else goes. But that’s the one rule you never break.

VERSUS: [somewhat softened at her appeal to their longstanding friendship] World won’t end. Prophecy says GOD ends the world. Since He doesn’t exist, it doesn’t mean a thing. They’re just blowing smoke up each other’s asses.

SOL: [shrugs grimly] I dunno, man. If you don’t need to have angels for demons to be real, then judging by the bodies've been stacking up around here, I’m starting to think maybe you don’t need God to have yourself an Apocalypse.

VERSUS: [thinking] Eh... I guess it WOULD be just our freakin’ luck. [groaning & fisting hands into his eyes] Aww, I am TOO goddamn drunk for this noise.

[Apathy's_Child]

MC: [slapping his cheek cheerily] Welp, you better sober your shit up, ‘cause there’s more where that came from. Okay - so the prophecy we told you over the phone talks about “the last living Prophet of the Lord”. But if you look at the original Greek, the closest literal translation to the original document is ‘godly messenger’. So the prophecy would seem to refer to a human - since unlike demons, there’s never once been a proven sighting of an angel.

VERSUS: - Because they don’t exist. [gets up for the bottle – when he almost stumbles, he shambles over to add water to the whiskey in his glass, muttering sullenly] Only the SHITTY things are real.

MISS C: [rounding on him as he sits back down] Would you man up, boy?!

VERSUS: [wounded] Hey. That’s heteronormative to the point of tyranny. I think you should find yourself an usher and check that privilege, ‘cause it’s weighing you DAFUQ DOWN.

MISS C: [contrite] Aw, come on, don’t be upset.

VERSUS: [upset] I’m not upset.

MISS C: Dude - this is, like, demon ARMIES, man. They’re... like... AMASSING. [moves her hands outwards as though holding a ball, now squinting drunkenly] All I mean is, we don’t have time be giant leaking pussies about it. Yaknowhum’ sayin’?

SOL: [as V opens his mouth indignantly] HEY. [snaps her fingers until they look back like dogs] The prophecy says that God’s last prophet will speak when the Gates open. Meanwhile, the demons have been hunting down Council members... and their corpses show signs of torture, way above and beyond even “normal” [makes quote marks with her fingers] demon attacks. It’s like they’re looking for something...

VERSUS: [catching on] Or someONE. [sits back, taking this in] So you think the demons are looking for the Prophet. To try and fuck with the Apocalypse they BELIEVE is coming.

SOL: [rolling eyes skyward] Oh, thank fuck for that. Good to have you back in the room, Versus. [Miss C rubs V’s arm with a congratulatory smile] Yes. That’s exactly what we think.

VERSUS: But there IS no Prophet. Because there is no GOD. No angels, no heaven – just –

SOL: [interrupting] – Us and them. You know the Council thinks so, too. But as long as the demons keep believing it – we’re gonna have a problem. They’re looking for all of us, right now. If they find us, they’ll torture us to death for information on a person who probably doesn’t exist. You know how superstitious demons are – the whole species-specific hysteria thing they’ve got going on over God and Heaven and all that never-a-verifiable-witness-statement crap. But it doesn’t matter that it’s not real – it’s still a problem. [shrugs] Fuck’s sake, V, we’re in a goddamn APOCALYPSE movie. Would you just freakin’ suspend your disbelief a LITTLE so we can move the storyline forward already? This shit’s already meandering all over the room like so much walking roadkill.

VERSUS: Okay, okay – long as we’re on the same page over God. So what do you wanna do about this?

SOL: We need to squash this shit. They’ve already depleted our numbers – twelve Council members killed in NYC in the last month. Seven of them hunters. We need to hit back while we still have something resembling a fucking fist left.

VERSUS: We hit the streets and all-out mad dog their asses? [breaking into a grin] AWESOME! The fuck didn’t you tell me that in the first place?!

MISS C: ‘Cause we needed it as ammo to soften the NEXT part of the plan.

VERSUS: Huh?

MISS C: [stroking his hair] ... Nothing, doll.

SOL: [glaring at Miss C as the latter leans back to get comfy] Look, we knew you’d like the tanks and rocket launchers shit.

VERSUS: [animating even more] There are TANKS AND ROCKET LAUNCHERS?

SOL: In your FUTURE, yeah. But first, we have to do the research part. So in the morning, we’re headed over to see an acquaintance of ours. She’s a Council academic who was working as a theology professor at Columbia. Her Council partner was killed three weeks ago. But just before HE got his spine ripped out, the two of them were studying the patterns in the attacks that had occurred in the weeks before. Attacks’d already started by then, you see. We all relocated after Man in Room 5 – that was her partner – kicked it. Miss C and I moved in here a couple of weeks ago. The academic went deep underground, but she’s come back to talk to us about what she and Man in Room 5 found before he was murdered. We need to check out the attacks for patterns. If demons get into our world by possessing humans who fall into darkness and despair, we need to know how so MANY of them are getting in all of a sudden. We might be able to stem their numbers before they overwhelm us.

VERSUS: [hopefully] Meanwhile... tank, right? You did say.

SOL: [sighing] AFTER, tank. Two days, dude. Tomorrow – recon meeting with our contact.

VERSUS: Who IS this contact?

SOL: Name’s Acharis.

VERSUS: Never heard of her. [pauses, then accepts this] Okay, then. I guess we’ll go talk to your academic. [rolls eyes with last words] And then... [stands drunkenly & practices throwing a rocket launcher in unsteady mime] POWWWWWWWWWW!! [fade out as Sol & MC exchange a satisfied drunken victory-five]



Almost done with the set-up. Ashley, you've given me an idea.

[Apathy's_Child]

Been catching up - have an idea of where this is gonna go. Shit's about to get Manichean.

These characters are old hat and don't act this way anymore. There's a reason.


Fade into the NY night outside – later that same night. Shot moves down onto a street, where a man is walking [or rather, strolling]. He is looking around him with an amiable grin on his face, enjoying the dark streets contentedly.

MAN: Hey, dude. [pause] Dude.

No one appears as he meanders along, but a disembodied voice replies.

VOICE: Yo. You got anything?

MAN: Nah, nah. Just saying. I know we’ve never BEEN anywhere else, but... this has gotta be the greatest city in the WORLD.

VOICE: I know, right? You see that skyline?

MAN: [seen silhouetted against the purple skyline from beneath as he leaps into the air with a grin, touching down in a crouch like a superhero] Um – it’s only THE MOST AWESOME skyline. [suddenly rises to his feet – or rather, floats as though lifted and set on them by an unseen force, before continuing along his way] This is SO COOL. I mean, I still wanna go home more than anything, but... once this is all over and we’re back where we belong, I think I’ll be glad we finally saw this world. You know?

VOICE: [solemnly, staying with him as he walks along] I feel you, bro. I feel you.

Suddenly, an old woman steps out in front of the Man.

MAN: [whispering to the Voice] Shh-shh-shh, heads-up. [looks up and continues towards the old woman] Oh, hey there. [smiles disarmingly] Sooo, you’re an old woman, huh? That’s nice. I’m a man. Yep, that's me - just a young, human ma-

Stops as her eyes scorch black – Man flaps his hands excitedly.

MAN: Dude, dude! I got one! [looks around – eyes light on a sign] 89th!

VOICE: [low and urgent] Already there. DO NOT start without me, you pigfucker!

A second later, there is a blinding flash of light, and a second man emerges, falling out of the air – catches himself before he can crumple to the ground, hovering like the first Man for a second before touching down.

Man 2: [looking at the old woman, who is hissing like a cat, startled by the flash] Awesome! It’s totally evil!

Man: Oh, man, I wanna kill it!

Man 2: [grabs his arm] Nonono! I wanna kill it!

Man: All right, all right – together! [agreed, they turn their heads as one towards the demon which has been staring back and forth between them, now nonplussed – shot of them leaping at the camera]

As they land on the old woman-demon, she appears to electrocute under their touch, hot enough to burst into embers without a long protracted burning-up.

Man 2: [watching the embers settle in the night, which is quiet again] Dude. That. Was. AWESOME.

Man: That was TOTALLY holy.

They bro-pound.

Man 2: [staring at him happily] You know, I KNEW we did the right picking you up, Ashley.

ASHLEY: Thanks, Desp. This last month has been the best of my life. It’s good to be on the side of the angels, you know?

Desp: Wanna go pyro some more demons?

Ashley: Fuck. Yeah.

[Versus]

Originally Posted by Apathy's_Child

ASHLEY: Thanks, Desp. This last month has been the best of my life. It’s good to be on the side of the angels, you know?

Aahahahaha. You TOTALLY beat me to it, fucker.

[Saya]

OMG Desp and Kontan are like Ben Affleck and Matt Damon in Dogma.

[BourbonBoy]

Originally Posted by Saya

OMG Desp and Kontan are like Ben Affleck and Matt Damon in Dogma.

Funny, I was just thinking the same thing :-?

[CuckooTuli]

My guess: AshleyO and Despanan undergo a crisis of faith, Despanan runs off to join OWS, and AshleyO devotes his new angelic powers to trolling the faithful. (Possible sidekick for Versus? I mean, his character also seems pretty hostile to the idea of God, so could be a marriage made in... a whiskey-pickled brain. ;p )

[Apathy's_Child]

Originally Posted by Saya

OMG Desp and Kontan are like Ben Affleck and Matt Damon in Dogma.

NOOOOO!! Damn, that was SO NOT supposed to be how they came off.

1: There will be no pro-religious element here, covert or otherwise.
2: These guys aren't fallen, and...
3: ... Ashley is Kontan renamed, and Kontan was human not so long ago, right? Which means I wanted y'all to think, "Huh, so wtf happened to that cat?" - NOT "HAHA MATT DAMON."

Also, Cuckoo: parts of that are so close, it looks like I've gotten predictable.

DAMN I need my Zombamojo back.

[Solumina]

How the fuck did I not know about this thread? Stupid move across the country, I miss out on all the fun.

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Apathy's_Child

NOOOOO!! Damn, that was SO NOT supposed to be how they came off.

1: There will be no pro-religious element here, covert or otherwise.
2: These guys aren't fallen, and...
3: ... Ashley is Kontan renamed, and Kontan was human not so long ago, right? Which means I wanted y'all to think, "Huh, so wtf happened to that cat?" - NOT "HAHA MATT DAMON."

Also, Cuckoo: parts of that are so close, it looks like I've gotten predictable.

DAMN I need my Zombamojo back.

Or maybe bromances are just that timeless/cliche.

Masculine romances are where its at.

[Acharis]

Awesome, the fan-fic is coming back! This is going to be good.

[Apathy's_Child]

Originally Posted by Saya

Or maybe bromances are just that timeless/cliche.

Masculine romances are where its at.

Good to hear, 'cause I already got you covered there. Y'all already know how much I love a good sap-off - and in that spirit, a certain jaded demon hunter is about to meet a certain archangel. Which, considering I've spent the past week in a sex glow, will most likely sicken anyone not currently in the grip of the loves-monster.

[Versus]

You don't know how true that is.

[Apathy's_Child]

The life-changing thing (I edited)? Sure I do. I'm highly sensitive to these things. Seriously, dude - sap. Sapsapsap.

[Apathy's_Child]

DISSOLVY VISUALS AS SHOT PANS OVER A CHAPEL AT THE EDGE OF A HOT, DUSTY VILLAGE IN MEXICO. DESERT CAN BE SEEN BEHIND THE SMALL STRUCTURE, THE ROOF OF WHICH IS ADORNED WITH A LARGE STONE CROSS.

CUT TO VERSUS, KNEELING SOME 100 FEET AWAY BEHIND A HORSES’ TROUGH WHERE THE VILLAGE PROPER BEGINS. HE HAS A SHOTGUN TRAINED ON THE CHAPEL’S ENTRANCE, AND IS WATCHING IT INTENTLY.

FEMALE VOICE: It’s about to happen, isn’t it?

SHOT MOVES OUT TO REVEAL SAYA STANDING BEHIND HIM.

VERSUS: [without looking up or turning] It always happens. Every single night.

SAYA: What if I told you it doesn’t have to?

VERSUS: I’d say you were full of it. Ain’t no escape from the shit that’s burned into your brain.

SAYA: I could take it away. If you wanted me to.

VERSUS: [finally looking over his shoulder, surprised] What – like erase the memory? The fuck is this – I walk into some sci-fi dream by mistake?

SAYA: [smirks] Dude, believe me – it is SO much worse than that. [pause] So – you want me to do it, or not?

VERSUS: Nah. [looks back at the chapel wistfully, as though wishing it could be otherwise] What happened here is a part of me.

SAYA: That’s true. [shrugs serenely] But on the flipside, you’d be able to sleep.

VERSUS: [shrugs ruefully] I’m sleeping now. Aren’t I.

SAYA: [shrugs back] Sure thing. Your call. [takes a step closer as he watches with mistrust] You need to stay sharp, though. There’s a war coming.

VERSUS: [smirks bitterly] Always. [looks back at the stone cross on the church, which is now burning like it's been going for hours, black smoke rising into the bleached and arid sky – finally turns away and climbs to his feet, giving Saya his full attention] So, just what the hell might YOU be, anyways?

SAYA: Your dream.

VERSUS: [shakes head as he circles her warily] Nah. I know the sound of my own mind talking to me. Damn well ought to by now... ain’t like the motherfucker ever shuts up. No - you’re something else. Aren’t you.

SAYA: [finally smiles at him] And you’re good. That’s why I’m here. You’re the only one who can do it.

VERSUS: [suspiciously] Oh yeah? Do what?

SAYA: Kill him.

VERSUS: Uh-huh. And by “him”, you mean…?

SAYA: [holding his gaze meaningfully] You know who I mean.

VERSUS: [now annoyed] You think I haven’t tried? The fuck do you think I’ve been doing for the past two YEARS?

SAYA: [watching him peacefully] Hiding from what happened here. Trying to make the memories go away. Basically, running up and down the country with your dick in one hand and a shotgun in the other.

VERSUS: [now angry] You don’t know SHIT.

SAYA: Sure I do. I know YOU. We’ve watched you all your life. [tilts head on one side as she watches him consideringly] You were born in a war. [flashback shot of a pregnant woman and a man, both clutching beer bottles and screaming at one another in a darkened trailer with shades drawn against the sun] Not all wars are as big as this one’s about to get, but… some of them are big enough. [flashback – baby V watches from a cupboard as the man shoots the woman, then, horrified, turns gun on himself] You never really had much of a chance… war after war, fight after fight... [flashback sequence through schoolyard fights featuring gradually aging baby V, until we see him as a teenager in army colors, shouldering a rifle] And you KNEW there was something very, very wrong with the world. You just couldn’t put a name on it. Not because you were dumb - you just couldn’t quite find the right words… words can be harder to find than ammo in times of battle. [looks at him gravely] I offer you only more war. Which is kind of ironic since I’m a bleeding-heart pacifist who practically weeps every time she treads on a bug, but whatevs – plot’s gotta come from somewhere. Sooo…

VERSUS: [laughs bitterly, dragging a hand down his face] Aaaaaand THERE it is. Every asshole wants the same goddamn thing from me. [fixes her with his most ferocious scowl] Well you know what? Fuck you, fuck your Kony shit, and FUCK your fucking war. I am DONE fighting other people’s. I’m fuckin’ busy with my own.

SAYA: [trying not to smirk, as though finding the scowl cute] I know. Look, chill, okay? I came to HELP, not try and command.

VERSUS: Yeah… thing is, every time someone says that, I seem to find myself down a couple of people I care about.

SAYA: [shrugging] Believe me - I'm not like anyone you ever fought with before. I’m just an ally – a non-silencing, non-co-opting, non-KONY ally. You want me gone, I’m gone. You want BACK-UP, though – I’m your Watson. [winks at him] Think about it.

VERSUS JOLTS AWAKE IN BED. SITS UP, THEN SETTLES BACK AS HE REALIZES WHERE HE IS, BROW FURROWING THOUGHTFULLY.

VERSUS: [speaking into the dark silence of the bedroom] I hate it when they send the HOT ones to recruit.