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Whining This forum is for general whining. Please post all suicide threats, complaints about significant others, and statements about how unfair school is to this board.

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Old 09-10-2011, 11:59 AM   #1
Elystan
 
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My girlfriend is evil

and she wants to live with me. What do?
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Old 09-10-2011, 12:02 PM   #2
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Say no? That's what you normally do to avoid unpleasant and ongoing bad....things.
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Old 09-10-2011, 12:07 PM   #3
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But I need a roommate and I don't know anyone else and she promises to do all the washing up.
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Old 09-10-2011, 12:43 PM   #4
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She won't. Queen said pain is so close to pleasure, how painful do you want it?
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Old 09-10-2011, 12:53 PM   #5
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Probably a little out of my depth tbh but it's so hard to resist a challenge
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Old 09-10-2011, 01:33 PM   #6
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Find a roommate through a friend instead... she sounds like she needs to be kept at arm's length.
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Old 09-10-2011, 02:19 PM   #7
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Why is she still your girlfriend? (Are you too afraid to end it? If so: I suggest you move away, colour your hair, have major plastic surgery and change your name just for good measure )
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Old 09-10-2011, 02:24 PM   #8
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Tell her she'll have to pay off her share of the rent in bed.

Then drive the debil out of her! Repeatedly! With vigorous thrusting ... if you get my subtle meaning.
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Old 09-10-2011, 10:03 PM   #9
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... she sounds like she needs to be kept at arm's length...
... with your hand around her throat.
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Old 09-11-2011, 04:05 AM   #10
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Find a roommate through a friend instead... she sounds like she needs to be kept at arm's length.
I have no friends ):
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Old 09-11-2011, 07:34 AM   #11
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Run an add looking for a room mate!
It may take a while, but it's worth the wait.
Living with her, even if she will clean,
is asking for a Versus uppercut to your spleen.
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Old 09-11-2011, 07:59 AM   #12
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I love how you all just took my word for it
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:28 AM   #13
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I love how you think we weren't trolling you.
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As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.


Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:40 AM   #14
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I'm going to say "Meh."
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:43 AM   #15
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I love how you think we weren't trolling you.
Oh no I didn't mean I was lying.

I really do find the credulity refreshing.
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:46 AM   #16
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Oh no I didn't mean I was lying.
Embellishing? Telling tall tales? Exaggerating the truth? Milking it for all it's worth?
Stop me if you've heard enough; I've got more.
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Old 09-11-2011, 11:15 AM   #17
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Oh no I didn't mean I was lying.

I really do find the credulity refreshing.
Good. Glad you were lying, because I don't know how someone would date someone they think is evil. Maybe living together is a big step, yet everyone should at least like the people they date.
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Old 09-11-2011, 02:12 PM   #18
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What? No I'm being dead serious and I like that everyone took that at face value. Really.
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Old 09-11-2011, 03:38 PM   #19
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Name one good reason (besides sex, because I'm trying to cut you the littlest bit of slack in assuming you are intelligent and not just thinking with your dick) why you would date someone who is evil.

Anyone can do better than that ... hell, being single is better than that.
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As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.


Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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Old 09-11-2011, 03:49 PM   #20
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What? No I'm being dead serious and I like that everyone took that at face value. Really.
You're missing my point then. Don't get into relationships with people you think are evil.
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Old 09-11-2011, 04:10 PM   #21
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Name one good reason (besides sex, because I'm trying to cut you the littlest bit of slack in assuming you are intelligent and not just thinking with your dick) why you would date someone who is evil.
Oooh, I can think of a few! You know someone who'll have no problem knocking off someone and think nothing of helping you stash or cut up the body. Also, if you're ever hungry, you always have a ready supply of pea soup around. Finally, any girl who makes out with a crucifix would probably do just about anything in bed, right?

Wait... is she evil or possessed? I might have gotten that confused.
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Old 09-11-2011, 04:19 PM   #22
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Naughty nuns....Mmmmmm....
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Old 09-11-2011, 07:44 PM   #23
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As to your girlfriend being evil, she is female, so this is a given. Also, being female I can tell you she won't do all the cleaning and what not. It will start that way and then she'll bitch at you for how lazy and messy you are and how you treat her like a maid. This is my experience with women and as a woman.
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:01 PM   #24
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Wait... is she evil or possessed? I might have gotten that confused.
I can't tell you how many times I've heard that before.
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Lead me not into temptation ... follow me, I know a shortcut!

As the poets have mournfully sung,
death takes the innocent young,
the rolling in money,
the screamingly funny,
and those who are very well hung.


Your days are numbered - 26,280 per person on average - 2,000,000,000 heartbeats ... tick, tick, tick
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Old 09-11-2011, 08:31 PM   #25
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Name one good reason (besides sex, because I'm trying to cut you the littlest bit of slack in assuming you are intelligent and not just thinking with your dick) why you would date someone who is evil.

Anyone can do better than that ... hell, being single is better than that.
Because when she ends all life on earth, you might be the last to go? Or the first. Who knows, she may let you choose according to your preference.

At the very least, you could get some good sex before you go in a fiery, humanity-ending cataclysm.

Not only that, but having sex with the Antichrist is probably the most remarkable thing you'll ever do with your life.
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