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Literature Please come visit. People get upset, write poetry about it, and post it here. Sometimes we also talk about books.

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Old 09-07-2009, 07:48 PM   #1
jack211
 
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Location: IN the shadows
Posts: 10
Cool white dove going black

this is my first please comment it
i hope you will like it and I'll be happy to share your opinions




i have a white dove
she was singing in the morning
and tell the jokes to everyone
she has good dreams
dream to fly to a new place
dream to meet a new face
but i let her down
i broke her every dreams
make her not as what she seems
and stained her pure wing
with my black grudge , hate , pain
i'v learned her how to
hate everyone , test the pain
scream of sufferance
she became a part of my blackness
she learned how to scream in the cold nights
to hate and abominate everyone
to deform her dreams
to burn her feathers and wear outmoded skin
she learned the rules
the rules to live in death
to scream and stop the breath
i let her go
now she lives in the darkness
in the shadows in every bleeding artery
this is the game , this is the life of death
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Old 09-07-2009, 07:50 PM   #2
Mir
 
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It's really good, I love it.
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Old 09-07-2009, 07:59 PM   #3
jack211
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mir View Post
It's really good, I love it.
thank's for your comment
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Old 09-12-2009, 03:07 PM   #4
mindless1
 
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nice poem.
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What?
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Old 09-12-2009, 03:12 PM   #5
JCC
 
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That sucked.
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Old 09-14-2009, 02:14 PM   #6
jack211
 
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to mindless1 : thank's alot for comment
to JCC : thank's it's your opinion
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Old 09-14-2009, 02:15 PM   #7
jack211
 
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to mindless1 : thank's alot for comment
to JCC : thank's it's your opinion
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