Happy and all....

[(heartofflames)]

Right, so everything is all nice and all perfect for me. I got into a top school, with the best students in the world, study in the summer at a great program that provides exercise and academics and all that good stuff....
But then again, I'm going to boarding school.
Just thinking about the impression I've left in my hometown of about 9 years, I'm just grimacing about how shallow of an impression I've probably left.
Everyone says on the last day of school: I'll miss you, good luck in boarding school <hug> bye!
Tears falling from their eyes and all that good stuff....
But they have their own friends. Closer friends than me, at least. No way are they going to think about me: they'll be moving on with their LIVES and completely forgetting everyone that meant less that everything to them. And my relationship with my friends is like "Nice girl, weird, but I like her." Meanwhile, I'm completely eager to be friends with everyone, but hell, they think I'm just someone you talk to between classes and never contact for the rest of your life.
Then there's the fact that I talk too much. Am I that freaking annoying that you don't even answer when I talk to you? I know the type: annoying as hell with their CONTANT COMMENTS ABOUT EVERYTHING: MAKING CORNY-AS-FUCK JOKES AND LAUGHING AT IT THEMSELVES WHILE EVERYONE ELSE CHUCKLES TO MAKE THEM FUCKING FEEL BETTER.
what a fucking beautiful impression to make.

[Crying_Crimson_Tears]

If it makes you feel better at all, what you just wrote about is basically my life story without the boarding school part.

[She_Is_My_Sin]

Don't dwell on it, move on and think about starting completely afresh at your boarding school and really make an effort with all the new people you'll meet.

Seriously, the more you think about it and let it get you down, the more it will hinder you in making new friendships.

I was feeling a similar way a few months ago when I left secondary school, but I realised I'm moving on to a place where everyone is going to be in the same position: missing their friends in university and trying to adapt at a new college, so I'm going to make the most of establishing friendships with some of them.

Also, don't bash your personality. You are who you are. Don't alter yourself for others.

Take care and I wish you the best at your new school.

[Tam Li Hua]

I agree with Sin. Dwelling on folks from your past will only get you down. Use your new life at the boarding school to start completely fresh.

I don't know you that well, but if you are as honest IRL as you are in this post, then you won't have any problem making friends. [If it makes you feel better, I didn't have any close friends at all until college. Maybe living there makes a difference..?]

[(heartofflames)]

Thank you all. I was having a let-down day. I'm all cheerful now -_-;;
Probably PMS

[Minyaliel]

*smiles* You know what, it's probably going to be okay. I finished my year at a fundie Christian boarding school this May, and I actually enjoyed it. If I managed to have a good time, so should you. Just try to make a good first impression on everyone quickly - be a social butterfly the first few weeks if you can, develop some close friends while being overly social in general for a few months and you'll probably not only get a bunch of new friends, you'll also have a great time. Positive thoughts, right? =)

[(heartofflames)]

<sigh> Well at least I know I can come to G-net and bitch about whatever's pissing me off, and people with either smack me back into reality and focus, or offer consolation.