Tell somthing about yourself, that you haven't shared with someone else

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

Woah, Ben's avatar is awesome

Jillian - Thanks!

I admit it doesn't have the sensuous alure of my lap-dancing-babe avatar (she will return someday.) But sometimes I'm a man of romance and sometimes I'm a man of action. When I posted the current avatar, I felt like action.

..Plus, I was trying to see if I could tell a whole story in less than 80x80 pixels and under 29k. I think I managed it.

Next one I'm thinking of making will be more playfull. But to see that you'll have to tune in again next time to "Avatar Playhouse!"

Heh heh heh!

[Manimal]

Eyes, Julia, Santarea, Wolfmoon... Thank you. I really appreciate it.

That helps alot. I didn't think I was acting out here any differently that I do in real time but what that person told me really threw me off. It was one of those things where I knew better but needed to hear it (assuming I was right). I really don't know where those perceptions of me came from and at this point I don't care. I'd much rather just move on and continue being lil ole me

You are all my favorite lovelies and are welcome to our harem at any time. The only rule you have to follow is being subservient to our queen, the beautiful Empty_Purple_Stars.

Bedtime hugs for all you ladies,
Manimal

[JuliaGaltic]

Originally Posted by Manimal

You are all my favorite lovelies and are welcome to our harem at any time. The only rule you have to follow is being subservient to our queen, the beautiful Empty_Purple_Stars.

That's the only condition?! I'm not even sure I consider that a condition.. *signs on to Expedia*

Is tomorrow a good day for company?

You two are exeptional people and you don't deserve in any way having anyone treat either of you with any less than the utmost respect.

People who know you personally should feel lucky and honored that they do.. *sigh* some people's kids...

[edible_eye]

so, bullshit's been called and manimal's having a moment of self-doubt?

as for the bullshit call - whether you know something over and above the rest of us or you just feel frustrated with the topic being discussed, if there's any truth to the story as it was told, that's a pretty harsh parry to joyslayer's position of en garde.

joyslayer - if you are dumping a load of falsely-tinged words onto the message board... why?

manimal - my thought - there's nothing wrong with getting to know people out there in cyber-world, letting your hair down and allowing yourself to feel comfortable in your posts. in a strange way, the internet has opened an interactive medium that falls just short of real life, in that it allows people to exchange what's on their minds without the benefit of face-to-face exchange.

if it works for you, all the better. if it starts to become the primary means by which you interact with the world... then i imagine you'd need to take a step back and figure out whether or not you were too involved.

personally, i enjoy the fact you've opened yourself on the boards. you have a way about you that brings an honest, open outlook to a variety of topics - one that doesn't pull punches.

don't worry about the image comment. if you're not true to your words, that'll shine through sooner or later. if you are true to your words, it's not image you're laying down - it's manimal.

[Sanctus Dei]

Manimal... whomever said whatever they said about your character is FULL OF SHIT....period. I've never felt snubbed by you or EPS in anyway. Even when I was slightly intimidated (say the first two weeks of posting), I received a warmer reception from the both of you then any other patron of this board (except Demonista). I would personally backhand anyone who has an ill word toward you. Don't let the opinions of envious assholes settle in your stomach and fill your head with doubts.

[The Minister Saint-Fond]

Once upon a time I knew this girl named Joanne. Joanne liked to be the center of attention. She didn't care how she obtained attention either, whether it was good or bad, she was just happy to get the attention.

Well, one day, she realized that it is a LOT easier to get attention for something negative such as being seriously ill, being abused, or being a 21-year-old soon-to-be unwed mother than to get attention from something positive like good grades, a good job, or even a sports achievement.

You see, getting attention for a positive thing requires hard work and occasionally sacrifice. Getting attention for a negative thing is simply a matter of telling a story about something vague enough to be unverifiable and yet horrible enough that no one will call you on it because they would be real jerks if *just maybe* you are telling the truth.

Her stories tended to use certain phrases regularly such as

"The guy came out of no where and I didn't see his face." This usually accompanies a story that takes place in a distant part of town that no one from the group listening to the story goes to but we can assume that the person telling the story had a reason to be there because she is very popular and appearanlty has a lot of friends and family members that we don't know about.

--or--

"It was at a party... [unspoken]But not Rob's party or Chis's party or anything... You wouldn't have known which one so I won't bore you with the details. It was a party that no one else I know was at because, despite the fact that I have never mentioned them ever, I have tons of secret friends that none of my regular crowd knows about and also tons of people walk up to me out of the blue and invite me to parties every day. I, of course, go to them because that's what people do when they get an invitation from a stranger, right? If you don't see me for an hour, assume I'm meeting one of my new or secret friends, probably at a big party.[/unspoken]"

--or--

"But he moved away and I don't know where and I haven't seen him since." This was always my favorite. This seems to make some kind of assumption that, if you **** or mug someone, and then leave the city, the cops will just drive to the city line and then stop abruptly, get out of their patrol cars, and shake their fists at you as you go. It also frees you from having to go to the police with this kind of information because, as you know, the cops don't chase people based on descriptive information. You have to supply a name, current address, and social security number for the person who attacked you before the cops will do anything. There's no need to submit to a **** kit or give a statement or look at a lineup because, you know, the guy left the city. No one is going to do anything about it.

Incidentally... Holy crap! The board automatically censors the word '****'. Well, I just want people to know that I'm typing the word, not some bunch of asterisks. **** is an atrocity that has to be faced and fought against, not some game to be tip-toed around and used for sympathy. The board may censor me, but I'm still typing '****'.

So anyway, in comes Joanne one night to the Denny's where we all used to hang out.

On that note, how many people hung out at the 24 hour Denny's when you were a teenager? I've always wondered if it's just in Northwestern Detroit where we do that. The old Denny's was bought out by some other guy and turned into another restaurant which has since closed. Denny's didn't make any money because the only people who went there were us kids who spent about $5 each and hung out there for like six hours at a time. The new restaurant failed because the new owner realized that, once he kicked all us kids out of his establishment, no one else really ate there either. ICP used to stay at the Red Roof Inn right by there (you would see their tour busses in the parking lot). Occasionally, they would be in the Denny's at 3:00 AM. They were kind of jerks unless you had girls with you.

ANYWAY... In comes Joanne one night to the Denny's where we all used to hang out. She has two of her friends with her and she has the "thousand-yard stare" on her face. This usually accompanies one of her bullshit stories. She was famous for these. Tee hee... I remember the time she tried to convince us all that her grandfather was Russian and she spoke fluent Russian... She would pick up her phone, ostensibly ringing because her grandfather was calling her at 11:30 at night, and say "da" and "nyet" into it as she listened. She hung up with a "daspidaniea" or however the hell you spell that. It was fucking priceless. A guy we knew had dated her for awhile and met her grandfather. We asked if her story held up. He answered only ,"That guy is Nyet Russian."

Right... so she sat down next to me in an adjacent booth and her friends did too. She wasn't looking at the menu or anything. She was just staring off into space.

Me: What's up, Joanne? You look more bummed than usual.

Her Friend #1: She got *****, asshole.

Yeah, yeah... I'd heard this story before. I shit you not, this happened in June and it was her THIRD **** story that year. She had been pregnant by one of them twice, but then lost the baby... Fuck that noise. I called her on it.

Me: Really? Again? That's the third time this year. Do you think she's pregnant again too? You know, maybe it's you. What kind of shampoo do you use?

Joanne shot me a dirty look and got up to leave. Her friends followed.

Her Friend #1: Fuck you, asshole. I hope you burn in hell. We're leaving.

Me: Try not to get ***** in the parking lot!

A month later, she and I were at a party at the local bowling alley ($1 beer night, Tuesday) and talking like nothing happened. Because nothing DID happen. And she'd actually forgotten about the whole story. It was just to get attention.

I've known a few girls who do that, make up stories. Just like I've known guys who claim to have gotten it on with 150 women, or that they were abused, or any number of other stories that don't quite check out and they have no real reason to tell you. Sometimes people tell stories to get attention.

BUT!

When that story is about an atrocity, it stops being just a story and becomes an insult to everyone who's ever really lived through it. I mean, what's next? Are we going to see people posting about their time at Auschwitz? Jeezus. Have some fucking respect for people. The fact that someone has had a tragedy in their life does not make them better, cooler, or more 'real' than you. It just makes them unlucky. And anyone who's REALLY gone through something like this would glady lose their "street cred" in order to have not gone through it.

Personally, I blame Drew Barrymore and the Brat Pack. They're the ones who made it "cool to be a mess". Entire relationships have been built up around the bullshit stories that people make up to seem cool. I've seen it a thousand times. It's not healthy and it's not ethical to form bonds or a social classificaiton around stories of atrocity. It's just sick.

So when I see someone tell an obviously fake story about an atrocity, I call them on it. And the funny part is, they always think that I'm the one being the asshole.

[WolfMoon]

Minister, I dig you like a double-wide grave.

\m/

[Mr E Nigma]

I'm scared sh1tless of the future. I don't want to grow up. I lie awake at night thinking of what will come to be. I think of all humanity and how we act as a whole. Such Violence and disloyalty. Traitors are found everywhere. They are this way because they are never content with what they have and don't believe that whatever side they are on can actually improve and succeed at their goals. These are cowards. I think about younger people and loyalty, and how it is very rare. A lot I've seen recently deals with males and their inability to stay loyal to their significant others. A good amount of guys I know stay with one person until they can find someone better and that's how they view relationships. As a way to keep improving the so called "Hotness" of their girlfriends and judging their sexual ability upon that category. I do have one friend though who is kind of like this, but I have no problem with him. Mainly because the difference between him and them is that he never has a girlfriend. He gets with a girl, them knowing fully well he's not looking for a relationship, then after awhile he goes to another. Apart from that he remains great friends with them all. I hate how humans act. Their infinite hypocricy, their unmatched stubborness, their inability to remain faithful to any 'cause whether it be a relationship, a team related activity, or a government. Almost everynight when insomnia plagues me for hours on end, I look at the world through crystal eyes... and I cry.

[WolfMoon]

Mr E, um you might want to see a shrink about that, hun.

And it's not only men who have a hard time staying faithful.

[Mr E Nigma]

Originally Posted by WolfMoon

Mr E, um you might want to see a shrink about that, hun.

And it's not only men who have a hard time staying faithful.

What would I need a shrink for? Yeah I know it's not just men. But, at this point in time the only people around me that I see doing it are guys. But I do realize females do it to. I don't know... I just think about growing up and being the leading generation. One of my friends could end up being the president or a governer. Or being a Football player, or being a really great actor. It just all seems so synthetic. We make everything and I feel like we'll destroy the world with our stupidity. I don't want to grow up in a war-driven era. It may be somewhat cowardice, pansy-ish, or whatever but I don't care. I'm generally a pacifist and there's so much violence everywhere. I love nature and animals, but it seems like overtime we will decimate every living thing on this earth. I may just be in denial of reality and want to neglect it. But it's how I feel....

Edit: Sorry for the random spontaneity of getting slightly off topic.. but I haven't slept in awhile and I have a pounding headache

[Wise Child]

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

I'm scared sh1tless of the future. I don't want to grow up. I lie awake at night thinking of what will come to be. I think of all humanity and how we act as a whole. Such Violence and disloyalty. Traitors are found everywhere. They are this way because they are never content with what they have and don't believe that whatever side they are on can actually improve and succeed at their goals. These are cowards. I think about younger people and loyalty, and how it is very rare. A lot I've seen recently deals with males and their inability to stay loyal to their significant others. A good amount of guys I know stay with one person until they can find someone better and that's how they view relationships. As a way to keep improving the so called "Hotness" of their girlfriends and judging their sexual ability upon that category. I do have one friend though who is kind of like this, but I have no problem with him. Mainly because the difference between him and them is that he never has a girlfriend. He gets with a girl, them knowing fully well he's not looking for a relationship, then after awhile he goes to another. Apart from that he remains great friends with them all. I hate how humans act. Their infinite hypocricy, their unmatched stubborness, their inability to remain faithful to any 'cause whether it be a relationship, a team related activity, or a government. Almost everynight when insomnia plagues me for hours on end, I look at the world through crystal eyes... and I cry.

I don't think about the state of the world in depth anymore - it just makes me depressed and scared and disgusted. Yeah, yeah, colour me Holden. But it's true - when you really sit and think about it, it's so fucked up that you'll give yourself a headache. I used to think that people could change the world, but at this point in history, on the tail-end of so many atrocities and with doubtless more to come, I'll be happy just surviving it.

Since I didn't answer this question in my intro: the thing I miss most about being a little kid is watching cute TV shows, sitcoms, Disney movies etc., and actually believing that life could be like that. And I mean that literally - I really used to think it could. (Then again, I used to eat paper at junior school.)

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

What would I need a shrink for? Yeah I know it's not just men. But, at this point in time the only people around me that I see doing it are guys. But I do realize females do it to. I don't know... I just think about growing up and being the leading generation. One of my friends could end up being the president or a governer. Or being a Football player, or being a really great actor. It just all seems so synthetic. We make everything and I feel like we'll destroy the world with our stupidity. I don't want to grow up in a war-driven era. It may be somewhat cowardice, pansy-ish, or whatever but I don't care. I'm generally a pacifist and there's so much violence everywhere. I love nature and animals, but it seems like overtime we will decimate every living thing on this earth. I may just be in denial of reality and want to neglect it. But it's how I feel....

Edit: Sorry for the random spontaneity of getting slightly off topic.. but I haven't slept in awhile and I have a pounding headache

The ability to feel deeply and passionately, is never a bad thing, Sweetie..

It can be painful, but it isn't a negative.

I think alot of us here(myself included) have those same thoughts..

I worry daily, about the world I am bringing my son up in.

One person CAN make a difference though.

I believe that now.

Ripples always touch other ripples eventualy..

*Hugs*

[Mr E Nigma]

Originally Posted by Empty_Purple_Stars

The ability to feel deeply and passionately, is never a bad thing, Sweetie..

It can be painful, but it isn't a negative.

I think alot of us here(myself included) have those same thoughts..

I worry daily, about the world I am bringing my son up in.

One person CAN make a difference though.

I believe that now.

Ripples always touch other ripples eventualy..

*Hugs*

Thanks. =gush= (Don't worry I'm not horribly mental randomly saying gush....I'm just fond of anagrams)

[The Minister Saint-Fond]

Foamy says drugs are bad.

Stop with the druuugs!


Drugsinyourhead!

[WolfMoon]

Originally Posted by The Minister Saint-Fond

Foamy says drugs are bad.

Stop with the druuugs!


Drugsinyourhead!

Only the bad drugs are bad!

[Empty_Purple_Stars]

Uhh..

[The Minister Saint-Fond]

But Foamy says all drugs are bad. You have to listen to Foamy. I think it's the law.

"Oh sad is the world. But I have Kevorkian Scarf."

That's fucking poetry.

I also like alcohol.

[Manimal]

Originally Posted by TStone

So let me get this straight...your image was supposedly wussified at some point in time, we all missed the memo, and now you’re doing damage control and manning up by...paying homage to manly junk in the picture thread?

I must have skipped that class in the Clint Eastwood Hard Case and Tough Trouser Snakes-Berry White Let’s Get It On-Macho Man Randy Savage OH YEAH—University for higher testosterone.

Hmmm, I wonder if I can petition for a recompense of my tuition?

And as for all the psycho-analyzing...I have a hard enough time diagnosing my own id, and when it comes to everyone else? I can only guess at hidden motivation, but when presented with honest forthrightness; then motivation is stripped away--leaving only the wet and raw emotive nerve endings, giving us a brief glance—a furtive moment to see for whom the bell tolls.

In those brief snatches of imagery, between your lines of abdominal and psychological symmetry, before all of this and before all of that, verily; long and long ago, I’d made my mind up about you, Manimal. We do all meet, in here and in real life, the occasional narcissistic sycophant, dishing out and tallying all the compliments, and expecting a return of tenfold. We do-also-meet, in here and in real life, the occasional reputable character, a man or woman who does a thing without expectation—climbs the mountain because it’s there—leads the troops from the front—calls bullshit when it’s bullshit—says a thing, does a thing, and the thing is said and done.

I think of you as the latter, as doing a thing saying a thing and getting the thing said and done. Is that manly? Eh *shrugs* it IS a trait I find myself wanting to possess more of, and a trait either in the masculine, or the feminine, which I’m besotted with.

If that boosts your ego and solidifies your self-image...it wasn’t meant to, which is, of course, the entire point. You don’t maneuver or compliment or swank about, and if you have you’ve really fooled me and I should cease and desist from all this tool worship before TMJ sets in, but I’ll take one last page from your book and call bullshit on what was previously (not right here, right now, godpoundit!) but recently--very strongly--suggested to you.

*Goes to smoke an ounce to that*

Aside from the obvious thank you - again - for putting so much effort into all the kind words, I just wanted you to know that I have the Macho Man Randy Savage rap album. Message me if you'd like a taste

The point obviously wasn't ego boost - at least not from me - I just found it so ludicrous that someone that I thought knew me very well would express that opinion of my character that I had to make sure I wasn't going crazy. At least not in that regard...

Now that we've got that settled I suggest we move on to more important things like finding out who's wearing the prettiest panties today... I'm guessing it's Ben

[sensuous0mar]

Something about me that I haven't told anyone? My dad just lost his job...and I'm scared. I really don't know what's going to happen to my family now. You all are the first to know.

[sensuous0mar]

Thanks. That makes me feel a little better

[Manimal]

Eyes - They'd only be pretty enough in person my dear.

And 0mar... I'm sorry to hear that. My dad was out of work for a time and the family had to struggle for a while but we made it. I'll bet yours will too

[Circle V]

Originally Posted by Mr E Nigma

I don't want to grow up.

Well, when I’m lyin’ in my bed at night, I don’t wanna grow up
Nothin’ ever seems to turn out right, I don’t wanna grow up
How do you move in a world of fog, that’s always changing things
Makes me wish that I could be a dog

Well, when I see the price that you pay, I don’t wanna grow up
I don’t ever wanna be that way, I don’t wanna grow up
Seems like folks turn into things that they’d never want
The only thing to live for is today

I’m gonna put a hole in my TV set, I don’t wanna grow up
Open up the medicine chest, and I don’t wanna grow up
I don’t wanna have to shout it out
I don’t want my hair to fall out
I don’t wanna be filled with doubt
I don’t wanna be a good boy scout
I don’t wanna have to learn to count
I don’t wanna have the biggest amount
And I don’t wanna grow up

Well, when I see my parents fight, I don’t wanna grow up
They all go out and drinking all night, and I don’t wanna grow up
I’d rather stay here in my room, nothin’ out there but sad and gloom
I don’t wanna live in a big old Tomb on Grand Street, ooh!

When I see the 5 o’clock news, I don’t wanna grow up
Comb their hair and shine their shoes, I don’t wanna grow up
Stay around in my old hometown
I don’t wanna put no money down
I don’t wanna get me a big old loan
Work them fingers to the bone
I don’t wanna float a broom
Fall in love and get married, then boom
How the hell did we get here so soon
Well, I don’t wanna grow up

I Don't Wanna Grow Up ~ Tom Waits

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Santarea

Ben- why feel anything for the situation? It's self created drama meant to derive attention. Don't feed it by giving an emotion to it. Look at boobies instead. No drama there.

Um ... it just occurred to me that I saw this, and while I enjoyed it thouroughly at the time I failed to reply with the dignity, respect and gravitas that it so ...

OMG BOOBIES!

Whoa ... I LIKE 'Em ... thanks for flashing me, Santarea!

Originally Posted by Manimal

Now that we've got that settled I suggest we move on to more important things like finding out who's wearing the prettiest panties today... I'm guessing it's Ben

What the ... now why would you go and say a tom-fool thing like that ... I've got half a notion to ... um, hang on - theres a delivery at the door ...

.
.
.
Hey ... a package! .... from Manimal .... awww!

You know, it doesn't matter what pretty colors you buy these things in. I'm never gonna wear them for you so stop asking already!

[Mr E Nigma]

Today... well yesterday rather now that it's about 2:03 according to my computer's clock and the timer thing that will display once this post has been mad. Yesterday was the first day in my entire life that I've cried in public. Before that I have always been able to hold it in and keep from shedding tears. I don't want people to see me cry. Though I do do it at an almost daily rate, NEVER have I done it in public.

I didn't realize this until my friend was talking to me about it later. He stated "Well, I was trying to ya know, think of something to say to you to try to help you stop crying 'cause you know your my boy and all. But, I couldn't due to my awe stricken self that I couldn't believe I was actually watching you cry, YOU, in public"

My reply "Woah.... your right"

To make me cry in public.. =sigh= I wonder if it is all worth it...

[Surgeon Méchant De Sang]

I just checked my last post on this thread, and it looks like I forgot to type the thing that I do when I'm nervous, so here it goes...

When I get nervous, I start to sing aloud. It's also something that I like to do when I'm completely alone. It helps me to calm down.

I'm also another person who talks to themselves. When I'm frustrated, I go on a whole bitching spree about it - TO MYSELF! It's weird, but it helps get the crap that was on my chest off of it.