Depression Quest (unsympathetic, offensive, morbid) RPG

[ssteve]

Originally Posted by Midnight_Carnival

<If I can't or for some reason don't post anything for 3-4 days, I'll tag you in, ok?>

You lose yourself in a fantasy in which you have a whole box of cigarettes, instead of one, piss-smelling abortion of a smoke in your pocket...
a mahogany bedside table with a lighter, instead of that superwood and metal tube crap, and are wearing any underwear under your chafing dirty jeans.
...any way out of this shit hole! even in your head - thinking of burning shit really almost makes you smile (Mood +2) unfortunately..
you don't seem to have a fucking lighter!
(Craving +1)
why are you alive?...

<anything for 3-4 days, I'll tag you in, ok?> <Ok I'll try and keep up!>

remove dirty jeans
pick up lighter
hold lighter flame under my hand, to see if I can still feel

[TrivialMorose]

Yell "I want to be free!" and toss the phone out the window.

...

Examine object.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by ssteve

<anything for 3-4 days, I'll tag you in, ok?> <Ok I'll try and keep up!>

remove dirty jeans
pick up lighter
hold lighter flame under my hand, to see if I can still feel

remove dirty jeans

you squirm out of the smelly, chafing pants and leave them to die on the floor. You are wearing nothing underneath (you are bottomless: this significantly effect how other characters interact with you!)
it feels good to let it all hang out (Mood +1)


pick up lighter

you have the corpse of cigarette in your pocket and NO WAY TO LIGHT the fucking thing. God must hate you to set you up with a cigarette but no lighter!
(Craving unaffected becsuse it's over 2, Mood -1)

hold lighter flame under my hand, to see if I can still feel

... a little hard to do without a lighter, so you improvise...
you punch yourself in the now exposed genitals.
It hurts like crap!
You laugh at yourself for being such a fucking imbecile. (Mood +2)

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by TrivialMorose

Yell "I want to be free!" and toss the phone out the window.

...

Examine object.

Yell "I want to be free!" and toss the phone out the window.

That's the spirit! you walk over to the window, naked from the waste down, shout about freedom and chuck the phone!

It nearly hits an attractive young woman on the paving below. She squints up at you, either not noticing, nor reacting to your state of partial undress, and walks on shaking her head.
Still, fuck facebook, fuck whatsapp and twitter and all that shit, if you had any real friends, they'd be here for you while you're going through this shit! You feel FREE!
(Mood +5, Lonely +2)

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

Examine object

You climb over the bed, check for your spidery friend (nobody's home) and dig the object out of a layer of grey dust roughly an inch thick!

It's a lighter! your dreams have come true!
if fucking only!
Nope, it's a can of something.

You wipe the dust off...
- what in the nine hells?
You read:

Pork of ENERGY
bacon flavour 500ml

*warning! high caffeine content, not suitable for...

Who the shit made a pork flavoured energy drink?
Who the crap would buy that?!

...apparently you would, although when and why, you can't remember.
the contents slosh wetly and fizzyly, promising carbonated, caffeinated bacony power...

[TrivialMorose]

Toss the energy drink out the window.

...

Examine whether there is a feasible way to climb down the window.

...

Examine any exits in the room.

...

Get down on your knees and closely examine the floor.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by TrivialMorose

Toss the energy drink out the window.

...

Examine whether there is a feasible way to climb down the window.

...

Examine any exits in the room.

...

Get down on your knees and closely examine the floor.

Toss the energy drink out the window.

You can't imagine a human being ingesting a bacon-flavoured energy drink. You throw it out of the open window. The can bounces and sprays its contents out in a fountain on non-khosher spume.
People stare upwards with a blankly hostile demeanor. You aren't wearing pants and suddenly feel very self-concious.
(you've gained Ashamed:1, Lonely +1)

Examine whether there is a feasible way to climb down the window.

In your current state of fitness, there is no feasible way to climb down to the ground - unless you dive out head-first and try to land just under the wheels of a passing car...
(Mood -2)
...in any case, nobody down there looks like they'd welcome a pantsless stranger from on high. You're attracting too much attention.
You close the window and curtains for now...

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

Examine any exits in the room.


Although it may feel like a prison, the door to your room has been open the whole time.
Through your open doorway you see your kitchen. You can't see the door to your bathroom from here. The front door is also not visible from here.

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

Get down on your knees and closely examine the floor.

The floor to the whole dungeon-like small habitation for 1 is made of cheap grey tiles (non gloss) - the kind whuch tend to become slippery when wet.
On the floor to your room there is:
- your unworthy self
- a pair of dirty jeans
- a distressing amount of unimportant trash (including your hidden shoes and socks)
and a ton of dust (under the bed)

[TrivialMorose]

Timidly peak out the door and try to spot the bathroom.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by TrivialMorose

Timidly peak out the door and try to spot the bathroom.

Regrettably, a herd of blood crazed catoblepas have failed to carry your unfortunate bathroom away in the night. It's still there, it's still so small that you can rinse your feet in the shower while opening the door should the mood take you without getting up while taking a crap...

[Midnight_Carnival]

Mood: 52 - not pleased but not suicidal
Craving: 3 - you REQUIRE nicotine!!!
Lonely: 3 - you'd dial 911 just so you could talk to the operator if you hadn't thrown your phone out the window!

You are bottomless, your fat saggy buttocks are on show for all the world to see (except there's nobody around because everyone hates you)

[TrivialMorose]

Get the mangled cigarette from the jeans and suck on it.

...

Slip into the bathroom and look around.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by TrivialMorose

Get the mangled cigarette from the jeans and suck on it.

...

Slip into the bathroom and look around.

Get the mangled cigarette from the jeans and suck on it.

it tastes as can be expected.
Sadly this isn't chewing tobacco - or maybe it's a good thing as that particular vice is closely correlated to high incidence of tongue and throat cancer - but you're fucking your body up by smoking anyway.... and fucking it up by not smoking... Is this making a difference? I mean are you feeling any better?
No, it only reminds you of how much you want to smoke.
(Craving +1, Mood -2)
you now have a soggy, mangled wet cigarette.

Slip into the bathroom and look around.[/quote]

The small bathroom is damp and oppressive - even more so than your room - You see:

- a toilet.
- a roll of toilet paper (1/2 finished)
- some dirty underwear (on the floor)
- a medicine cabinet with a mirror on the front of it.
- a moldy towel.
- your toothbrush.
- your shower.
- a slimy bar or soap.
- a giant slug crawling up the wall (my god, look at the size of that thing!).
and no more

[Midnight_Carnival]

<if I add things up wrong or make another mistake, let me know - I sometimes forget to mention qualities in my recap, but I normally only do that for 1 entry>

[TrivialMorose]

Decide to quit smoking.

...

Toss the wet cigarette in the toilet.

...

examine the slug.

[ssteve]

Originally Posted by Midnight_Carnival

remove dirty jeans

you squirm out of the smelly, chafing pants and leave them to die on the floor. You are wearing nothing underneath (you are bottomless: this significantly effect how other characters interact with you!)
it feels good to let it all hang out (Mood +1)


pick up lighter

you have the corpse of cigarette in your pocket and NO WAY TO LIGHT the fucking thing. God must hate you to set you up with a cigarette but no lighter!
(Craving unaffected becsuse it's over 2, Mood -1)

hold lighter flame under my hand, to see if I can still feel

... a little hard to do without a lighter, so you improvise...
you punch yourself in the now exposed genitals.
It hurts like crap!
You laugh at yourself for being such a fucking imbecile. (Mood +2)

Look for room exit
Madly stroke my flaccid shaft

[Midnight_Carnival]

<wait, you want to attempt to pleasure yourself while looking at a slug? I... I may need some time to determine how that goes.
Further - I did intend this game to include mature content, but sex won't feature heavilly - I assumed the "you" I write about would be more depressed if s/he had less, rather than more sexual activities.
Thanks for keeping this interesting, I'll write back soon>

[ssteve]

Releases slug from grasp
Walks to nearest wall
Smashes face into wall,
Again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by TrivialMorose

Decide to quit smoking.

...

Toss the wet cigarette in the toilet.

...

examine the slug.

Decide to quit smoking.

...

Toss the wet cigarette in the toilet.

...it's not like you have money to support this habit anyway. You throw it into the toilet and decide you won't need to smoke again.
Somehow, finding resolve makes you feel a little better about your life.
(Mood +2) Welcome to at least 3 weeks of hell...
(the quality "Craving" has been replaced by "Withdrawal" - it functions as "Craving" set to 10 always and will severely effect social interactions and tasks requiring concentration)

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

examine the slug.

The slug in an unusually large specimen with beautiful blue eyes. It placidly slides along the wall, eye stalks wavering, looking at nothing in particular, and grazes on the mould growing on your bathroom wall. The slug has it easy, you wonder what good deed you will have to do to be reborn as a slug. You see tiny mites scurrying up and down on the slug - they appear to be cleaning it.
Suddenly the slug turns and regards you with a mollusc expression.
The phrase "We are contented" seems to reverberate in your head.
You feel intrigued and disgusted at once.

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

examine the slug.

The slug in an unusually large specimen with beautiful blue eyes. It placidly slides along the wall, eye stalks wavering, looking at nothing in particular, and grazes on the mould growing on your bathroom wall. The slug has it easy, you wonder what good deed you will have to do to be reborn as a slug. You see tiny mites scurrying up and down on the slug - they appear to be cleaning it.
Suddenly the slug turns and regards you with a mollusc expression.
The phrase "We are contented" seems to reverberate in your head.
You feel intrigued and disgusted at once.

==more==

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by ssteve

Look for room exit
Madly stroke my unaroused genitals*

You start thinking dirty at the slug and it seems to respond telepathically. Your mind is flooded with stomach-churning images of slugs entwined in mucus. Massive, bisexual organs or cryptic reproduction emerge from an orifice in their sides and intertwine to form an oddly floral shape.
You don't only see this, you feel it...
Hardly material to get off on - anyway, depression has left you very disinterested in sex and you've neglected many aspects of your life.
To your surprise, you find your body responding.
You do maintenance, sort yourself out and feel slightly better.
(Mood +4)
but the images keep coming, you see that the slug is extending something twisted from the side of its body.
"entwine" it seems to say, "embrace us".

Suddenly you want to get away from this as fast as possible, you look for the bathroom door...

==more==


* I didn't specify that "you" was male or female at any point, so "you" could have a floppy hot dog or a dry bun...

[Midnight_Carnival]

Originally Posted by ssteve

Releases slug from grasp
Walks to nearest wall
Smashes face into wall,
Again
And again
And again
And again
And again
And again

You try to disentangle your mind from the simple mind of the slug.
It is difficult to release the slug-thoughts.
Perhaps some pain (seeing that a fucking cigarette is out of the question!!!) might help?
You smash your head into the wall several times with intent.
After about 3 times you fall to the floor, you get up and do it again, determined to damage your brain or escape consciousness.
Somehow, feelings of self-preservation you didn't know you still had kick in and you hit your head against the wall with less force.
It seems almost arbitrary at this point that the telepathic bond you shared with your psychic slug has gone.

(you have gained qualities Headache: 9 and Bleeding: 1 - your Mood remains unchanged)

You stumble out of the bathroom door holding your injured forehead and trying to stay upright. You make it into the small "livingroom/kitchenette" which you have mostly used to prepare and consume food in (your kitchen) before falling to the floor.
You cry.

[Midnight_Carnival]

Mood: 56 - you're coping fairly well.
Lonely: 3 - the last person you spoke to was a slug
Headache: 9 - you feel like you need and ambulance!
Bleeding: 1 - you should stick a hello kitty bandaid over that some time...

You are bottomless - "is it a full moon tonight?"
You are suffering from tobacco withdrawal - You will be more aggressive and even violent with people, you can't concentrate for shit and you want to punch someone.