For Fun samurai or viking berserker

[Godslayer Jillian]

Because they were more testosterone than they were tissue.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

Because they were more testosterone than they were tissue.

Mmm Mmm Good.

[viscus]

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

I could easily have been implying that Norsemen's penises are so outrageously large that anyone whose member is of average size would be daunted. This logical leap, coupled with your bold surmise regarding my opinion of asian girls, leads me to think that some insecurities may be bubbling to the surface here in the Samurai vs. Vikings thread.

My insecurities? No. I just hate it when people take cheap shots at others' manhood based on their race. But apparently everyone else thinks it's COMEDIC GOLD.

[Draco_Sanguine]

Well its true...have you ever watched asian porn? they are like 3 inches. Besides where you think vikings get that massive testosterone drive. Oversized penis is the answer

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Draco_Sanguine

Well its true...have you ever watched asian porn? they are like 3 inches. Besides where you think vikings get that massive testosterone drive. Oversized penis is the answer

Wow. It's rare that I'm so wrong about how stupid someone is.

[Draco_Sanguine]

Did you even read the thread or catch just that part.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Draco_Sanguine

Did you even read the thread or catch just that part.

I've been reading the thread.

If you really think that penis size is related to race, or that testosterone is supplied by the penis, you're a moron.

[Draco_Sanguine]

testosterone is actually supplied by the testicles i know how it works im being sarcastic and yes asians do have very small penises and if you think otherwise you are in denial. even asians will admit they have small penises and will bitch about it.

also as a note i can be very sarcastic about things intended for comedy so please try not to take anything too seriously this only an internet forum people forget that.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by Draco_Sanguine

testosterone is actually supplied by the testicles i know how it works im being sarcastic and yes asians do have very small penises and if you think otherwise you are in denial. even asians will admit they have small penises and will bitch about it.

No...it's not related to race in any significant way.

[MegearaErotica]

I would say a Viking berserker would win, mostly because they were known for their ferocity in battle.

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by Underwater Ophelia

No...it's not related to race in any significant way.

Isn't China the smallest-penised country on Earth? It also has the most people of any country.

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by MegearaErotica

I would say a Viking berserker would win, mostly because they were known for their ferocity in battle.

So were Samurai.

[Joker_in_the_Pack]

Originally Posted by Draco_Sanguine

testosterone is actually supplied by the testicles i know how it works im being sarcastic and yes asians do have very small penises and if you think otherwise you are in denial. even asians will admit they have small penises and will bitch about it.

also as a note i can be very sarcastic about things intended for comedy so please try not to take anything too seriously this only an internet forum people forget that.

GRAMMAR! USE IT YOU TWIT!

[tekajo]

i vote samurai. Not that any of my experiences have any kind of correlation with a viking versus samurai scenario, but i have been in quite a few barroom brawls. The redneck honky-tonk kind.

i learned if you got some big burly corn-fed berserking redneck coming to "whoopass" on you all you have to do is keep your wits let the idiot wear his self out and then deliver a very effective strike on the nose.

Not the same kind of fight but i figure the concept is close enough.

[Jonathan]

Another one for the samurai. Big surprise, neh?

The closest thing to a viking that faced the samurai would probably be a mongol - and when the mongols tried to invade Japan they got their asses handed back to them despite using superior tactics like arrow volleys and such. Samurai were raised from the age of five learning how to kill the shit out of anything in need of a stabbing.

These guys weren't worried about raiding villagers for food. They were the martial elite of a warrior culture, who for the most part just did not know when to quit. Especially if it was one of those stubborn vicious types from the Satsuma region.

[Solumina]

Originally Posted by Albert Mond

Isn't China the smallest-penised country on Earth? It also has the most people of any country.

There have been studies into penis size and the difference between the group with the largest average and the group with the smallest average is about 1/4 of an inch (also in case you were wondering the vaginal size of women in the groups was proportionate to the average penis size) that wasn't deemed to be enough to make any sort of difference in ability to perform.

[Saya]

Originally Posted by Albert Mond

Isn't China the smallest-penised country on Earth? It also has the most people of any country.

We actually discussed that in anthropology when we were talking about stereotypes..... the prof asked us "What are some common stereotypes?" and someone said that. And then we'd have to look it up and see if its true.

What was concluded was that some studies suggest that the average can differ from country to country, but not by a significant amount (one study found an inch difference but others much less), and there is a lot of variety within the population, thus concluding that there isn't enough of a consistent or significant difference to be worth mentioning.

Anthropology: knocking stereotypes down one at a time!

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by Saya

We actually discussed that in anthropology when we were talking about stereotypes..... the prof asked us "What are some common stereotypes?" and someone said that. And then we'd have to look it up and see if its true.

What was concluded was that some studies suggest that the average can differ from country to country, but not by a significant amount (one study found an inch difference but others much less), and there is a lot of variety within the population, thus concluding that there isn't enough of a consistent or significant difference to be worth mentioning.

Anthropology: knocking stereotypes down one at a time!

What's the Asia-to-Africa difference?

[Godslayer Jillian]

I think it's like an inch. I kind of remember a statistic about the average and it goes from the near 6' to the mid 7'. But that does conclude that there's a consistent difference.

[shogem]

I'd also like to throw in that piercing chainmail can be done, depending on the type of chainmail used. Sheer size wouldn't help a viking; he'd have to be fast and quick-witted to avoid any major blows from the sword so he could get close to a samurai. Or, he'd have to be quick with a poleaxe or battle axe--more distance than a sword OR brute force.

Penis-size is irrelevent if you're dead.

[Draco_Sanguine]

Not even entirely sure why this thread moved on to penis size. Back to someone elses comment. Yes it is. It's called genetic pre-disposition. anyways. The samurai would not be able to block an attack from the vikings axe which would balance out the speed equation. The axe is too strong and would need to be dodged as vikings usually carried a shield and were good at using it too.

[Jonathan]

Hard blocks are rare in kenjutsu, and non-existent in just about every higher level sword art. No one who had half a clue would try blocking an axe with a sword.

It's all about redirection, blending, avoiding. It isn't like Star Wars or Highlander.

[Toy Killer]

Hard Blocks are rare in Kenjutsu, becuase forcifully putting something in the way of a Katana is foolish. Putting something in the way of a Battle Axe is equally foolish. Redirecting a Battle Axe is tough though, its weight disposition is much farther upward then a sword. Blending would be scarcily availible (If were using the same term here, I assumed using attacks to counter your opponents last movement, but I usually hear that as Handling) when facing an opponent from a vastly different culture and style of fighting (chances are, the Viking is well aware he left his under arm open for a slice and is ready to knick it away after the sling). And you can't really avoid a point blank tackle, I don't care what stance or how skilled you are.

My biggest argument here, is straight forward beginner's luck. The Viking knows the basics, or slightly advanced basics of fighting. He knows to avoid his weapon and wrap flesh around his. he probably knows how to do this pretty well, and has been doing it for the better part of 10 years. Samurai learn the higher vantage points of the art of fighting, and those points are passed through thier culture, even to those not interested in it's practice.

So a typical Japanese fisher understands that a sword held out in front will help his defense, allowing him to redirect an attack, so that by the time it hits the hilt it will be safely away from his body. He doesn't understand the finer details of that stance. A well trained and polished Samuria would laugh when he decides to take a defensive stance, knowing how to break through it, how to disassemble it, And how to embolden it as nessicary.

And the Viking, makes no sense to him what-so-ever.

His stances aren't familiar, he can't curb him into poor decisions in stances, He is just a chaotic force and strikes when he feels it is time to strike. In chess, a lucky beginer will take a rook. In Combat to the Death, A lucky Viking will leave a nasty gash all across his pretty little Kabuki mask.

[Albert Mond]

Originally Posted by Toy Killer

Hard Blocks are rare in Kenjutsu, becuase forcifully putting something in the way of a Katana is foolish. Putting something in the way of a Battle Axe is equally foolish. Redirecting a Battle Axe is tough though, its weight disposition is much farther upward then a sword. Blending would be scarcily availible (If were using the same term here, I assumed using attacks to counter your opponents last movement, but I usually hear that as Handling) when facing an opponent from a vastly different culture and style of fighting (chances are, the Viking is well aware he left his under arm open for a slice and is ready to knick it away after the sling). And you can't really avoid a point blank tackle, I don't care what stance or how skilled you are.

My biggest argument here, is straight forward beginner's luck. The Viking knows the basics, or slightly advanced basics of fighting. He knows to avoid his weapon and wrap flesh around his. he probably knows how to do this pretty well, and has been doing it for the better part of 10 years. Samurai learn the higher vantage points of the art of fighting, and those points are passed through thier culture, even to those not interested in it's practice.

So a typical Japanese fisher understands that a sword held out in front will help his defense, allowing him to redirect an attack, so that by the time it hits the hilt it will be safely away from his body. He doesn't understand the finer details of that stance. A well trained and polished Samuria would laugh when he decides to take a defensive stance, knowing how to break through it, how to disassemble it, And how to embolden it as nessicary.

And the Viking, makes no sense to him what-so-ever.

His stances aren't familiar, he can't curb him into poor decisions in stances, He is just a chaotic force and strikes when he feels it is time to strike. In chess, a lucky beginer will take a rook. In Combat to the Death, A lucky Viking will leave a nasty gash all across his pretty little Kabuki mask.

That's like saying a drunk can beat a Samurai because the drunk doesn't fight well. Absolute rubbish.

[Toy Killer]

No, A drunk isn't conditioned to fight for his life and survival on a weekly basis. Drunken Masters developed unpredictablity on this principle though.