a mood set from birth...

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 02:00 PM

before of anything...Nayiry is my real name it's not a nickname...my nickname is Nocturna...

1. What do you do? (Hobbies, job)

hmmm, i get bored with stuff really quickly...but the hobbies that did last till now...are: reading, writing SCRAPS, drawing SCRAPS, surfing the virtual world, watching movies , listening to music....and discovering new interests.

2. Where are you from?
Syria/Aleppo....with Armenian origin...

3. Who is your favorite author?

Paulo Coelho, Nawal saadawy

4. What are your favorite films?

the exorcism of Emily rose, case 39, inception, Mr.nobody, the silence of the lambs, troy, Caroline, Sweeney Todd, corpse bride, marry Shelly's Frankenstein, perfume: a story of a murderer, the illusionist...not remembering but there are some others...

5. What music do you want played at your wedding?

not really hopeful about getting married...

6. At your funeral?

hmmm, if i had to choose...maybe it will be Moonspell's scorpion flower...dunno

7. This IS a gothic website, so... how do you want to die?

as i always fantasize...SUICIDE...slitting risks and watching the beautiful blood flow in a graveyard..., but i think i will die because of heavy smoking...THAT'S WHAT I'M PLANNING TO before i get 30 ...

8. What kind of casket would you want?

wooden one with beautiful carvings on it...and red from the inside...

9. What's your FAVORITE outfit?

anything dantel...in black ..red or grey..

10. What's one thing you miss about being a little kid?

being free from the boundaries the logic and reality set on my imaginations...
being hopeful.

11. What's your favorite band?

Moonspell -ed since three years ....

12. What kind of education do you have? What is/was/will be your major?

I'm currently studying English literature, but to not increase ur expectations..I'm not studying it in Oxford , i'm in the second year now...soon i will be in the third year ( it's four years here).

13. Why did you join?

the place where i live...we dont have a Gothic subculture or a scene or anything...scattered individuals here and there, so i thought that by coming here I may find some more Goth mates.

14. If the first 13 questions didn't give it away. What is your gender?

FEMALE.

Alan · 06-14-2011, 02:01 PM

You're gonna hate us.

MissCheyenne · 06-14-2011, 02:05 PM

Why oh fucking why, do people seem to think suicide is glamourous and beautiful? Seriously? I don't get it, I really really don't.

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 02:05 PM

>_<...

ok

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 02:07 PM

MissCheyenne:

I think that's because everything is relative...

Alan · 06-14-2011, 02:16 PM

Everything is relative... thus all babybats like the same things?

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 02:29 PM

Allan: so i am a babybat now..too bad..i liked cats more

Stormtrooper of Death · 06-14-2011, 02:39 PM

Alan, props to you sir.

Anywho, OP, er, a..............I don't even.....

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 02:54 PM

Stormtrooper: so using a language i wont understand?

well..yup i'm a "newbie" in your assumption and it happens that i'm not trying to prove that i'm a Goth...simply because i'm NOT, I love gothic music and art and i dropped off that "goth" label long ago...and if u r wondrous why did i sign up here or looking for goth mates...that's because i enjoy talking and communicating with goth people...HOPEFULLY that they may understand me

Stormtrooper: so using a language i wont understand?

and yup i'm only 19, but it happens that i do speak and write 3 languages fluently and soon moving to the fourth..but I'm not using them cause i'm trying to COMMUNICATE...not to win new enemies...but anyhow if my presence is bothering u...i'm not going to PROVE the opposite and i will leave....

Renatus · 06-14-2011, 03:26 PM

Your perception of what is goth is actually skewed from what it actually is in reality. Gothic metal for example, doesn't really have anything to do with goth. You can hang around here in spite of that but just don't call yourself a goth just yet. Look on wikipedia if you want to learn about it, it's surprisingly accurate. We also ave a thread here called goth with a hammer or something like that, I don't have a link for it.

But don't worry you can learn, and if you have a thick skin you might stick around here a long time, just don't let yourself get scared off by the welcoming committee.

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 03:48 PM

Renatus: as i said...i'm not trying to prove that i'm a goth..nor willing to.., i enjoy various kinds of gothic music...from classical to rock and metal, in fact gothdom is the reason why i started listening to metal in the first place.

if people here will hate me now cause they think that i'm a poser

three years ago they were going to kill me then!

and i read more than Wikipedia...i even came here long ago but never participated

and as i said i'm not going to BECOME goth...cause i have an identity and it's called Nayiry...i'm not a goth..yet i have a gothic side inside of me and i love it

and the welcoming thing..it's ok..
although that somehow i got a flashback of my high school welcoming!!!(where u r never good enough)

thank u anyways

Alan · 06-14-2011, 03:54 PM

The problem is that I can pretty much predict everything you're gonna say in any thread where you might contribute.

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 04:25 PM

Alan: for your information...i never was EDUCATED to be a goth....I AM WHAT I AM, if u knew people like me in ur life, lucky u, i hardly find people like me where i live, so i cannot be that much imitative as u r pointing, for that i had no one to imitate, even online this is my first contribution in western forums, and the only reason why i was into gothdom, because i felt like i was a one long before i knew it was labeled!...still i dropped the label off because my person doesn't only revolve around gothdom.

and just to give u a hint..if i was a childish poser imitative girl who looks for being accepted,attention and individuality, although that inviduality and being accepted dont go together...wasn't i going to join a local emo forum?

people who went outboards and met goths told me that they are mostly educated...respectful,openminded and nice people...not like what most people think of them, i believed what they said till i stepped here...till now i'm more refused here than from the common people in my society...

and u can predict as much as u like...u can be a prophet too

Alan · 06-14-2011, 04:57 PM

See? That's the standard "whatever" response I knew I'd get.
Also, I was hoping you'd put somewhere in there an insult on how 'educated' goths are supposed to be and how you're disappointed, because we're somehow being 'mean' to you (if this is mean then you're just weak) as if intellect and tact had to do with each other.

Murder.Of.Crows · 06-14-2011, 05:07 PM

Really, your biggest problem that I have with you is the, "suicide is beautiful" comment. Suicide is for weak minded people looking for attention, usually they don't even have a good reason to commit suicide. That and your trying a tad bit hard to seem cool.

Valhalla · 06-14-2011, 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nayiry

but i think i will die because of heavy smoking...THAT'S WHAT I'M PLANNING TO before i get 30 ...

Hold on, did you say you're planning to get lung cancer?

Renatus · 06-14-2011, 06:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nayiry

Alan: for your information...i never was EDUCATED to be a goth....I AM WHAT I AM, if u knew people like me in ur life, lucky u, i hardly find people like me where i live, so i cannot be that much imitative as u r pointing, for that i had no one to imitate, even online this is my first contribution in western forums, and the only reason why i was into gothdom, because i felt like i was a one long before i knew it was labeled!...still i dropped the label off because my person doesn't only revolve around gothdom.

and just to give u a hint..if i was a childish poser imitative girl who looks for being accepted,attention and individuality, although that inviduality and being accepted dont go together...wasn't i going to join a local emo forum?

people who went outboards and met goths told me that they are mostly educated...respectful,openminded and nice people...not like what most people think of them, i believed what they said till i stepped here...till now i'm more refused here than from the common people in my society...

and u can predict as much as u like...u can be a prophet too

Goth actually isn't that big of a deal,. you cant be born a goth, goth or not simply relies on your music taste. If you don't listen to gothic rock you aren't goth, simple as that, it's not that big of a deal. Heck this isn't even a goth forum technecally, its a gothic literature forum. Don't worry about it too much, it doesn't make you any less of a person

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 08:14 PM

Alan: lets say i'm weak....what are the intentions of your replies then?

Murder of crows: i already noticed that people here hated me for thinking in suicide...
it's beautiful for me in the manner of imagination...I'm not willing to commit it not directly cause it will ruin those who are around me..i'm not that immature
and about being weak or not...only God knows what cross i bear...on the second hand dont forget psychological problems like depression..i suffer from it long ago and i kinda got used to it....
and you can judge as much as you want...still u never stood where i stood in my life to be fully aware of my condition and make a judgment...i'm used to be judged...it's what human beings were good at...to sit...watch and then judge...

and about trying to seem...cool??...see..again u r thinking that i'm asking for attention? i'm only trying to be myself without getting influenced with negativity as much as i can....and sorry to disturb any of you

Valhala: i already have a weak respiratory system so i decided to attack it,...i know that for those who suffer or knew people who suffered from cancer will find this annoying...but yet life is the only teacher...the same way it got me frustrated with living it...who knows maybe one day i will wake up longing for a one more day...
i forgot to mention that i'm highly attracted to the idea of martyrdom...but again i dont have the courage to commit suicide..

Renatus: for a obscure reason i dont find ur replies offensive...maybe because u r good at convincing me that i'm not when u r doing it xD, but anyhow i will watch my steps to not make a big deal of goth...and i listen to most kinds of gothic music yet i dont want people to call me a goth...

cheers...and as i said if i was annoying or anything..my most hated thing is to hang where i'm unwanted...i will leave peacefully

Nayiry · 06-14-2011, 08:28 PM

if there is an admin here or anything i ask him/her to inactivate my account if it was possible...i dont have that much spare time to deal with other people's negativity now....byezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Murder.Of.Crows · 06-14-2011, 08:31 PM

How the hell is suicide beautiful? In any manner what so ever? Secondly don't spew out your bullshit like life is so hard and no one understands what your going through. Everyone has issues and there will always be somebody else worst off. Fucking crosses to bear.

Depression doesn't mean you think suicide is awesome or beautiful. Untreated it can make it seem like the only option left. They don't want to. They don't use it as some introduction as some " I'm so dark i want to bleed out in a graveyard," bullshit thing.

Martyrdom?! In what way would you even be a martyr. Let me ask you, if you died, who the fuck would care? What reason would you have died for.

Your just another immature idiot. Tell you what grow the fuck up, and try again.

Renatus · 06-14-2011, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nayiry

Renatus: for a obscure reason i dont find ur replies offensive...maybe because u r good at convincing me that i'm not when u r doing it xD, but anyhow i will watch my steps to not make a big deal of goth...and i listen to most kinds of gothic music yet i dont want people to call me a goth.

Well of course you don't find my replies offensive, I have no intent to offend you, merely intent to inform. I don't like hurting people's feelings.

I understand if you really think you must go, and of course I can't stop you, you must do what you think is best. But remember not everyone here wants to be mean to you, even the mean sounding posts are also in their own strange way just trying to help you, because suicide is an extremely serious topic. I wish you luck in your future endeavors, and bid you farewell.

Still Jack · 06-15-2011, 07:15 AM

Lolwut. That one didn't last long. Can we have another one?

Apathy's_Child · 06-15-2011, 08:21 AM

Jilly, why do you deny me?

MissCheyenne · 06-15-2011, 08:26 AM

There there AC, come rest your head on mah shoulder and let it all out. That's right, let it all out. If you're smooth enough, you might even get a sneaky grope in.

Apathy's_Child · 06-15-2011, 08:44 AM

You are my whale-song, MC. Wanna help me raep Jilly?