Fate.

[JCC]

Another spontaneous poem. Haha, these are always the best kind, just let your thoughts spill out.



Why do I toss and why do I turn,
Is it fear of an unknown or just another insomnia fit,
Just a blip on the radar of life that shall pass and give way to opportunity fresh?

There is no opportunity,
Predestination, a predecessor to will that leaves us oblivious,
And tears spontaneity into shreds on the floor that are myth and legend and tale.

A clarity of thought,
Here is my path and I do what I will, what I will is to follow the path,
But with an understanding of my purpose, have I truly lost my purpose?

The adventure shall wane and the fire shall die,
I know where I'm going and I know where I am,
Yet I'm lost, awash in a sea of uncertainty.

For fate is so dull, so mundane and morose,
And now that it is set out for me, inescapable,
I despise it with passionate furore.

I would break from this mould but the mould shall not break,
All I achieve is a waste and a loss of the time, such precious ticks on the clock,
Of the time that shall go towards my fate.

The world is pressing down even though I'm on top,
And a structural collapse may be imminent,
I don't wish to be squashed, to be quelled, by the world, but is there really any other culmination for me?

For there is no escape,
Fuck destiny. You've stolen all that I am and shall be,
Now I focus on what never can pass. An obsession with the unattainable that becomes totalitarian and holds endless grip on my life and my will, all of this, all around me is reserved for the free and for those with the will to the power and the freedom shall come and prevail.

But there are no free... are there?

[JCC]

Haha, complete indifference? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

[thedoll]

the line "But with an understanding of my purpose, have I truly lost my purpose?" is irritating. Put some thought into works before calling them finished maybe

[Uncle Smoov]

Hey JCC, here's some thoughts spilling:

thedoll agreed with me when I told her that your poem bloez chunx. It doesn't even rhyme. The Oxford English Dictionary defines poetry thusly:

po·et·ry /ˈpoʊɪtri/
–noun
1. the art of not sucking at writing poems. Also, all poetry must have strict rhyme and rhythm. None of that 'can'-'ham' bullshit.

Sorry to rain on your wimp parade, but shouldn't this thread be in the Whining forum? It looks like it. I wish I hadn't read the whole thing, because now I feel mundane and morose, when in fact I am the total opposite of both, exotic and vivose.

[JCC]

Wimp parade? Here's a tip, don't take what is written as a solid opinion. I wrote it as it came to me, I didn't ponder over how to pour my feelings out, just my thought on what fit. I'm indifferent to destiny, for the most part. I just felt bored and decided to write something. Also, most great poetry has no rhyme. Yeah, sad fact. So, even if my poetry did completely suck (which wouldn't actually surprise me, since I spent a couple of minutes on it and then didn't care to do any editing because... well, it was to pass boredom), your opinion is null.

Except for if the post was sardonic.

[Stuporman]

Originally Posted by JCC

So, even if my poetry did completely suck ... your opinion is null.

Except for if the post was sardonic.

Why yes, my post was characterized by bitter or scornful derision. And so, as your logic concludes, my opinion of that heap of dumpster garbage that you mystifyingly call a poem isn't null after all!!!1111

Love,
Papa Smoof

[JCC]

I meant sardonic in the non-derogatory sense, but I'm glad that your internet ego is replenished.

[Uncle Smoov]

Originally Posted by Stuporman

Why yes, my post was characterized by bitter or scornful derision. And so, as your logic concludes, my opinion of that heap of dumpster garbage that you mystifyingly call a poem isn't null after all!!!1111

Love,
Papa Smoof

I don't suggest you impersonate me, whelp.

signed soberly,
the legitimate 'Papa Smoof'

[Uncle Smoov]

Originally Posted by JCC

I meant sardonic in the non-derogatory sense, but I'm glad that your internet ego is replenished.

Oh, you mean the sense that doesn't exist? Way to lie about our upstanding language. You just made about a billion enemies, pal. As for my internet ego, it never really gets deplenished, but I'm happy to know that your heart is in the right place. Although a better place for it would be my dripping palm.

[JCC]

Sardonic is mocking humour. You can mock without intent to offend.

Also, your discussion board-based superiority complex is tiresome.

[Rae Ven Rae]

What is up with Uncle Smoov --I leave a for a few days, come back, and this guy is STILL attacking people and calling it wit--how is that conducive to discussion, which is like, hello, the aim of a DISCUSSION board...?

Can somebody please find one post where he was nice? if you find it post it here, so I can read it and pass out from shock...

I just think Smoov comes in here to get his jollies from poking fun at Goths--he may not even be a Goth himself, justs soemone who likes to feel superior in whatever realm he encompasses...

*sighs*

*folds arms over chest*

*waits patiently for the typical, pseudointellectual, sardonic, wise ass response*

[Steppenwolf]

Originally Posted by thedoll

the line "But with an understanding of my purpose, have I truly lost my purpose?" is irritating. Put some thought into works before calling them finished maybe

I find this line the best . Suggest you read something about modern physics , and re-think about what that may means . You are missing something is worth to know ...

Every new piece of Knowledge can change your previous ideas , as you put a new light into the thing ... For your eyes may be not the same thing as before , so you have lost something : What it was before ...

Yes , in a way this fact is irritating ... But poetry is about irritation and confusion ... Movement .
Not about teach someone the poet's ideas about some-thing ...

The rest is ok , just ok ...

[Uncle Smoov]

Originally Posted by Rae Ven Rae

What is up with Uncle Smoov --I leave a for a few days, come back, and this guy is STILL attacking people and calling it wit--how is that conducive to discussion, which is like, hello, the aim of a DISCUSSION board...?

Can somebody please find one post where he was nice? if you find it post it here, so I can read it and pass out from shock...

I just think Smoov comes in here to get his jollies from poking fun at Goths--he may not even be a Goth himself, justs soemone who likes to feel superior in whatever realm he encompasses...

*sighs*

*folds arms over chest*

*waits patiently for the typical, pseudointellectual, sardonic, wise ass response*

It's good to know that I'm so loved here as for my presence to be requested, but I do hope you realize that I cannot tend to all of my fans. Consider yourself lucky. I know I do.
How can you fail to realize that my views are imperative to the many discussion to which I've deigned to add my infallible wisdom? If you were to analyze any one - or every one, should the mood strike you - of my posts, you'd discover a wealth of amiable chittery-chat. That is, in fact, all of which I am capable. I'm here to help the Gothic tribes to become great by destroying shittinesses of every type. I didn't choose to be superior, and any decent human being should find numerous jollies in bettering the human race.
I will remain here until I deem the Goths capable of becoming the greatest civilization their potential allows. It's a sad fact on your part that you'd rather be crushed by the weapons of your enemies than ponder upon, and inevitably agree wholeheartedly with, my admittedly sometimes controversial wisdom.

[JCC]

You really ought to try going somewhere where being a pretentious and condescending ass over the internet is appreciated.

[Uncle Smoov]

Originally Posted by JCC

You really ought to try going somewhere where being a pretentious and condescending ass over the internet is appreciated.

I agree wholeheartedly, JCC, Rae Ven Rae can really be a jerk sometimes. It's refreshing to know that someone has the courage to defend me once in a while. This isn't to suggest that I need to be defended, but it's just nice to know the world isn't a bunch of incontinent cowards. I award you the Continence Award of the Week for your diaperless ability to stand up to bullies like Rae Ven Rae, who I hope can be a big enough person to apologize to you. You certainly deserve it.

[Stuporman]

I'd hate to make any enemies, but I think it's a bad idea to take anything seriously from someone who says things like "I'm happy to know that your heart is in the right place. Although a better place for it would be my dripping palm." Don't feed the troll, as the folk wisdom goes. Come on, he called me a 'whelp'! Just take him for what he's worth.