Acceptable age difference to date?

[Godslayer Jillian]

Originally Posted by JCC

I think it's a good organisation. Not sure why the Man/Boy thing is important any more though, they may as well just be a general sexual liberation movement.

I can't agree with that. It can't be sexual liberation when we're talking about pre-sexual beings.
Kids can't be sexual. Teenagers already have big problems coping with their own sexuality, let alone understand it. Kids can't be pushed into a sexual environment when they still don't possess that quality.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Godslayer Jillian

I can't agree with that. It can't be sexual liberation when we're talking about pre-sexual beings.
Kids can't be sexual. Teenagers already have big problems coping with their own sexuality, let alone understand it. Kids can't be pushed into a sexual environment when they still don't possess that quality.

Part of the ethic of the NAMBLA is that coercion and exploitation are both forbidden. If someone decides of their own accord to make a decision that they're not ready for, how is that anyone's fault but their own?

[Godslayer Jillian]

But can that decision be actually made by children because of their own accord or only as an imitation to what they see between grown ups?

[ArchLich]

Originally Posted by JCC

Part of the ethic of the NAMBLA is that coercion and exploitation are both forbidden. If someone decides of their own accord to make a decision that they're not ready for, how is that anyone's fault but their own?

When it comes to a child, because the average child isnt mentally developed enough to know what is in their best interest, or to weigh the consequences of their actions, which is why the parent suffers such consequences for not controling their children.

When it comes to an adult, say the person was drunk or high, many times they are eligible for temporary insanity or default due to disorientation, they still get in some type of trouble, but not legally serving a sentence in which someone whom was deemed mentally competent would.

[AngelikDemonik]

I'm 23 and the man I'm going to marry is 36.

[KontanKarite]

As a general rule of thumb, I have a hard time believing that a 20 something can relate in any way to a teenager.

If that 20 something can, then what does that say about the 20 something in question?

However... I don't stick to that rule entirely. Someone I may be dating is 19 and I just turned 25. So... yeah.

Basically, if the younger one knows of what they're getting into with the old one and can live with that, then I say more power to them.

[Corpsey]

I see this all the time around me and I only question what the two people are planning on getting out of the relationship and what they will be into 3 years down the track.

For example a 17 year old girl starting university dating a 28 year old man is fucking questionable. In 3 years time she'll be graduating with the world as her oyster and he'll want to start a family (if we are following steriotypical assumptions) which makes things impractical from the start.

If both people have the same objective in 3+ years time or so then the relationship might work, but it depends on the maturity of the younger person.

In NZ I'd say it's not too strange to see girls falling for men ten years older than them while they are in their teens.

And fuck NAMBLA. Like GSJ said, if they don't have the sexual maturity let alone a comprehension of sexual conduct then what the fuck is going to make a man-boy relationship work?

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by JCC

Part of the ethic of the NAMBLA is that coercion and exploitation are both forbidden. If someone decides of their own accord to make a decision that they're not ready for, how is that anyone's fault but their own?

In this case, the problem isn't the person consenting, it's the adult.
A ten year old can think himself ready for sexual relations with a forty year old, but since he is compromised by youth, IT IS up to the adult to say no.

[Solumina]

While coercion is denounced by NAMBLA they have no problem grooming the children. It isn't coercion and it isn't forced but brainwashing children so that they will be willing to sexually gratify you is still wrong beyond measure.

[NightmareInShiningArmour]

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

As a general rule of thumb, I have a hard time believing that a 20 something can relate in any way to a teenager.

If that 20 something can, then what does that say about the 20 something in question?

However... I don't stick to that rule entirely. Someone I may be dating is 19 and I just turned 25. So... yeah.

Basically, if the younger one knows of what they're getting into with the old one and can live with that, then I say more power to them.

I don't see how you find that not possible. I've seen it happen many times and I get along better with older people than I do with my own age group.
It depends on the maturity of the younger person. It doesn't show that the older person is less mature. Well, not always.

[Joker_in_the_Pack]

Truthfully?

Do what makes you happy and tell the rest of the world to shove the fuck off.

[MollyMac]

In many states, there is a "Romeo and Juliet" clause/understanding. It's a 2-4 year age gap where one may be age of majority (typically 18 ) and the minor is 2-4 years younger. It's often used in BS statutory cases where the kids began dating when both were minors and then one turned 18 and the parents now had leverage to end it.

Age of majority is a general consensus. Age of maturity is so widely variable, we had to have an age where we can smoke, vote and fuck without mommy holding our hands. It is a law, but more a social guideline for what we think is an OK age to accept responsibility for our own actions.

I understand why many would see a 16 year old with a 27 year old as a coerced/groomed/pejorative situation- and it may be. Legally, it is because we do not deem a 16 year old to have the mental capacity/maturity to handle this. What magically changes in the 2 years from 16 to 18? A hell of a lot.

The 4 years between 14 and 18 are a hell of a lot longer than the 4 years between 30 and 34. FOr some reason, a decade and a half have a balancing effect, namely because around the late teend to early 20's, development reaches critical mass.

You can always tell when it's creepy, though.

[JCC]

All of the examples of 8 year old boys and 10 year old boys aren't really relevant, since I sincerely doubt that an 8 or 10 year old boy would be interested in a sexual relationship with a man without coercion or manipulation; brainwashing or grooming is certainly manipulation. More importantly, that's physically dangerous for one of the people involved, so I wouldn't condone a sexual relationship. Most man-boy relationships are with young teenage males, 12 or 13+. Maybe it's because I'm the youngest one in this discussion and can still remember what it was like, but when I was 12 everyone I knew was thinking about sex. It might be irresponsible to accept a proposition from someone in that age range because they might not be emotionally mature enough or whatever, but people make a lot of irresponsible decisions and I can't be bothered being enraged at all of them.

[Underwater Ophelia]

Originally Posted by JCC

All of the examples of 8 year old boys and 10 year old boys aren't really relevant, since I sincerely doubt that an 8 or 10 year old boy would be interested in a sexual relationship with a man without coercion or manipulation; brainwashing or grooming is certainly manipulation. More importantly, that's physically dangerous for one of the people involved, so I wouldn't condone a sexual relationship. Most man-boy relationships are with young teenage males, 12 or 13+. Maybe it's because I'm the youngest one in this discussion and can still remember what it was like, but when I was 12 everyone I knew was thinking about sex. It might be irresponsible to accept a proposition from someone in that age range because they might not be emotionally mature enough or whatever, but people make a lot of irresponsible decisions and I can't be bothered being enraged at all of them.

No one was really talking about being enraged, just being against it or thinking it's all right.

[NightmareInShiningArmour]

I believe you're older than me, JCC.

So basically, if I don't allow it to be creepy, it won't be. If I don't make a big deal out of it it won't be. Correct?

[Joker_in_the_Pack]

Originally Posted by NightmareInShiningArmour

I believe you're older than me, JCC.

So basically, if I don't allow it to be creepy, it won't be. If I don't make a big deal out of it it won't be. Correct?

Dick is fourteen.

As for your question, I refer you to Mark Twain -
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."

[NightmareInShiningArmour]

I'm also 14.
Anyway, cheers.

[JCC]

Originally Posted by Joker_in_the_Pack

Dick is fourteen.

As for your question, I refer you to Mark Twain -
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."

Fifteen, motherfucker.