Shark Week RPG

[Hearts_Purple]

I drain the sink by disconnecting the pipes undeneath then it's outside to shut off the water coming into the house. Once that's done I chop up both sharks and put them in the freezer.

[Saya]

Oh, and to think I didn't leap out of the sink and start chomping your face. Et tu, Wolfie?

[Anarasha]

Will I get to be turned into a shark as well?

[Ben Lahnger]

Originally Posted by Saya

Retaining my human memories, I splash wildly to get the goth wet, so that her mascara and ten pounds of eyeliner runs into her eyes, blinding her. I then attempt to communicate with her by Morse code, tapping my fin on sink, to reassure her that until recently I was human and I pose no threat. My meat is also spoiled with mercury.

Heh! Mascara! Lulz! Also, mercury? Really? That is such a Saya answer. I wonder how the goth will respond to your wildly slapped Morse code, what with being suddenly, shockingly blinded and all? Now if you had slapped the rhythm to a Sisters Of Mercy song ...

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

The man is shredded to nothing, denouncing you as a traitor to your species with his last anguished breath. You listen unfeelingly, peering out the window in an attempt to gauge what sort of horrible apocalypse is unfolding. At the end of the street you see the wreck of a sedan, wrapped around a destroyed, still leaking fire hydrant. The released water seems to have collected in a large pothole-- and although its darkened by blood, you can see the vague shape of a huge fucking shark, circling within.
What do you do?

As I listen to the fading sounds of my fish food, I stare out my window with the dawning realization that this is it ... the Sharkalypse is upon us.

The idea of keeping one as a pet seems much less appealing now.

I stride to the closet and don my Neptunic Sharksuit. I strap on a belt with my favorite hunting knife, some flash-bang grenades and various other tools I might need. I add a Colt Delta Elite 10 mm handgun in a strong side Harlow Holster for crowd control, along with additional ammo. But what to carry for the sharks? I don't see Heidi Montag’s Breasts in my closet. So I settle for a Benelli Supernova 12 gauge pump shotgun with a pistol-grip stock, and pocket plenty of shells.

I return to the bathroom and unload one .12 gauge shell into the head of my beloved pet. Ah, he will be missed ... but not for long. I'll be having shark fin soup for supper! Yummy!

Then I walk outside, stride down the street to within 20 feet of the pothole, aim the Benelli at the head of the large shark that is thrashing there ... and fire.

[Solumina]

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

You have a Mako Shark. It fits in your tub, okay? It appreciates the chicken, but its hunger is a bottomless pit. What do you do?

Hmmm a Mako, those bitches are fast, I best be on my toes, at least they aren't too maneuverable so as I don't get directly in front of his face I should be good.

Now what to do about his little hunger problem, I can't afford to keep him fed. I am looking to replace my roommate, perhaps I could make a post on Craigslist and when people come to look at the place I just may accidentally bump them into the tub. Unless of course they would actually make a good roommate, then I'll just have to ask them to chip in for half of his food, and of couse let them know that I have to use the shower in their bathroom instead of mine, since mine is home to a shark.

[Despanan]

Originally Posted by gothicusmaximus

http://www.billcurtsingerphoto.com/*...ereatsbird.jpg

...and a fierce battle ensued.

[Hearts_Purple]

Originally Posted by Saya

Oh, and to think I didn't leap out of the sink and start chomping your face. Et tu, Wolfie?

Hearing the shark frantically tapping out the bassline for Lucretia My Reflection as I approach, I decide not to kill her and try to communicate. I reconnect the pipes, turn the water on and fill the sink up for her as we start our discourse.