Rant Thread - Page 248

Aaroneet · 07-29-2008, 08:08 AM

I'm going to be assessed at an eating disorder clinic on Thursday. Naturally I'm nervous, but at the same time somewhat eager to go.

MollyMac · 07-29-2008, 03:54 PM

Smart call. From having been there, though, it may be a shock to your system to get the black and white on what you are doing to yourself. Let the shock go and get down to taking damned good care.

I am glad to see your take on it though, and acceptance of the sitch. You will get through this, no doubt at all.

disorder · 07-30-2008, 04:58 AM

My brother's best friend is in a diabetic coma. He's in hospital, and he's probably going to die. If he doesn't, he's more than likely going to have brain damage due to the swelling in his brain.

My brother found him in his room at college this morning, and he's probably been in the coma since the middle of the night.

I'm so scared

Underwater Ophelia · 07-30-2008, 05:24 AM

Aw, Disorder, that sucks.

All I can say is don't get upset over things that haven't happened. There's really no way to predict what will happen, so don't think it's the end. It's possible, but it's also possible he'll come out of it and be ok.

She_Is_My_Sin · 07-30-2008, 11:34 AM

Disorder, I'm really sorry to hear about that. Ophelia is right though, you can't know what will happen until it does. You have my condolences.

Xombie · 07-30-2008, 05:27 PM

Does this seriously sound like something I would say?

"i think you're really cool and i always have fun hanging out with you. too bad you dont feel the same about me. youre constantly looking down on me and make me feel like im not good enough for you. thats why we'd never work out..."

Some guy is absolutely convinced that I wrote that in his ~truth box~, and still fails to believe me when I tell him otherwise. I'm not a sappy little bitch who is enough of a pussy to have to tell somebody something anonymously. Ugh.

Jaye Jang · 07-31-2008, 09:23 AM

Dear TK, I work at home and in a hospital. You can obviously type and you are obviously intelligent. If you have any medical training check out a site called MTdesk dot com. You can also work at home as a legal typist and a law enforcement typist if your state has those. Otherwise good luck.

BTW, don't remember who posted this and don't have time to look, but my friend did not wind up with fibromyalgia because she is overweight. She wound up with it because she was hit by a drunk driver and it totaled her car -- and her career.

thekorupt · 07-31-2008, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jaye Jang

Dear TK, I work at home and in a hospital. You can obviously type and you are obviously intelligent. If you have any medical training check out a site called MTdesk dot com. You can also work at home as a legal typist and a law enforcement typist if your state has those. Otherwise good luck.

BTW, don't remember who posted this and don't have time to look, but my friend did not wind up with fibromyalgia because she is overweight. She wound up with it because she was hit by a drunk driver and it totaled her car -- and her career.

I would love to know who posted that. Fibro has nothing to do with weight... its usually caused by a physically traumatic event. For me, lets just say traumatic was an understatement. So if anyone wants to say it was my weight, I would love to take a baseball bat to them and let them find out what causes it first hand.

And Jaye... I have no medical training, but I have been looking into some from home work. Due to some injuries to my hands, typing can get hard when its prolonged... I have done everything from be a nanny to build websites. Right now, I am hoping I can get back to a point where i can go to college and start some home based career. I am only 20, so theres no reason not to as long as I can get my health in order.

LaBelleDameSansMerci · 07-31-2008, 11:31 AM

http://www.carnivalelunebleue.com/home.asp

GRRRR It's 40$!
I wanna go >.< *cries*

TheBloodEternity · 07-31-2008, 03:10 PM

Damn it! I work with jalepenos all the time and this has never happened...... but my motherfucking hands are on FIRE.

MollyMac · 08-01-2008, 07:22 PM

I spent most of the day making french toast, sorting out other's issues (some legit, some bullshit), and drinking to poetry with duck and the Syndicate. We got him Maker's Mark bourbon as a "drink this, it helps managing us swallow a little easier" gift of appreciation/placation."Don't Fear the Reaper" was on repeat on my I-Pod all morning. It really, really... I really cannot tell you exactly what it does to your house, but it sure as fuck fucks with your head. Felt liek there was too much space behind my eyes, like I had heard only that song my whole life, like an ohm or heartbeat... convincing me, it.. it's so sexy somehow, so surrendering to my ears, the notion of letting go and floating somehow, somehow...... and then we can be like they are, and my mind turns to corpses, preserved in formaldehyde, unnatureal folds cold in flesh, eyes clouded by death and days, the wind the only motion to their cells, mauze and sweat making them slick under their clothes in this humidity, and they would hold out their hands...... or just sitting behind him, wrapping my legs and arms around him, and slowly, bloodlessly removing the tendons from his neck...... and brings me to the dream I had last night-I was laying naked on a steel table, and used a scalpel to open my abdomen laterally and pull out every organ, one by one, clean it off in soda water and lemon, and rest it in steel coptic jars... liver, kidneys, intestines, stomach, even my heart that I knew was too cold to live, but beat anyway- so hard it cracked the steel jar... and when I was finished, with no emotion, with only the pragmatism of dissection, I scrubbed out my empty core to the muscle and packed it with rosemary and gauze before stitching myself up, washing away all traces of blood and putting my lab coat back on and then laying down, calmly on the table, pull a gun into my mouth and pull a triggernormally, you would ake up here in a startbut i could feel the pain of my shattered face and skull, I could not feel my brain, I remember thinking I had forgotten a detail, left my brain in my body, and now it was a mess. How dare they find me like this now???I heard someone knocking and my gurney rattled, I heard them walking around me, wondering how the corpse was suddenly almost decapitated and bloodless when an hour before, it was not even dead yet.then i woke up

Methadrine · 08-01-2008, 07:40 PM

That's the most beautiful lines I've read in a long time, molly. Shattered face and skull. Must stop posting everywhere. Got to stop act childish. Take care when taking drugs. Got lots left. This month is gonna fucking rule, although I feel a bikergang breathing down my neck. But I'm one of them. I'm tough as nails. The girls always check me out on the street. I keep chainsmoking to keep them away. They are just normals. I need someone special with a flare for Buffy the vampireslayer and who looks great. Got to adore the sisters too, how else are they going to call me their own personal Eldritch. He ordered a beer next to me once, at the last concert. Beat bauhaus by miles. I have been listeing to the sisters all this year I remind myself. Don't need any other band. This is where I belong. With the drums. With the shades, with the drugs and stone cold attitude. Can't figure out why no one wants this. I'm great in bed, got a large cock and I use it well. Sex is not over in minutes but hours. Please the girl, please the girl. All that matters. Look into eyes that love instead of use. I get used you know. My dark vision of the world keeps me jaded. Got to post this. Want to wake up tomorrow refreshed. It just a shot away, love sisters.. it's just a shadow way.. children, just a kiss away.

Post it while I'm completely sure of everyone just laughing at me at the moment. Warm. Give me more.... speed.

Joker_in_the_Pack · 08-03-2008, 12:00 PM

I hate thread hijackers, do people really have no attention span at all?

PortraitOfSanity · 08-03-2008, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joker_in_the_Pack

I hate thread hijackers, do people really have no attention span at all?

I'm extremely offen..... Ooo look a quarter....

Methadrine · 08-03-2008, 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Methadrine

That's the most beautiful lines I've read in a long time, molly. Shattered face and skull. Must stop posting everywhere. Got to stop act childish. Take care when taking drugs. Got lots left. This month is gonna fucking rule, although I feel a bikergang breathing down my neck. But I'm one of them. I'm tough as nails. The girls always check me out on the street. I keep chainsmoking to keep them away. They are just normals. I need someone special with a flare for Buffy the vampireslayer and who looks great. Got to adore the sisters too, how else are they going to call me their own personal Eldritch. He ordered a beer next to me once, at the last concert. Beat bauhaus by miles. I have been listeing to the sisters all this year I remind myself. Don't need any other band. This is where I belong. With the drums. With the shades, with the drugs and stone cold attitude. Can't figure out why no one wants this. I'm great in bed, got a large cock and I use it well. Sex is not over in minutes but hours. Please the girl, please the girl. All that matters. Look into eyes that love instead of use. I get used you know. My dark vision of the world keeps me jaded. Got to post this. Want to wake up tomorrow refreshed. It just a shot away, love sisters.. it's just a shadow way.. children, just a kiss away.

Post it while I'm completely sure of everyone just laughing at me at the moment. Warm. Give me more.... speed.

I have _no_ recollection of posting this.

That bothers me.

HumanePain · 08-03-2008, 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MollyMac

floating somehow, somehow...... and then we can be like they are, and my mind turns to corpses, preserved in formaldehyde, unnatureal folds cold in flesh, eyes clouded by death and days,
...... and brings me to the dream I had last night-I was laying naked on a steel table, and used a scalpel to open my abdomen laterally and pull out every organ, one by one, clean it off in soda water and lemon, and rest it in steel coptic jars... liver, kidneys, intestines, stomach, even my heart that I knew was too cold to live, but beat anyway- so hard it cracked the steel jar... and when I was finished, with no emotion, with only the pragmatism of dissection, I scrubbed out my empty core to the muscle and packed it with rosemary and gauze before stitching myself up, washing away all traces of blood and putting my lab coat back on and then laying down, calmly on the table, pull a gun into my mouth and pull a triggernormally, you would ake up here in a startbut i could feel the pain of my shattered face and skull, I could not feel my brain, I remember thinking I had forgotten a detail, left my brain in my body, and now it was a mess. How dare they find me like this now???I heard someone knocking and my gurney rattled, I heard them walking around me, wondering how the corpse was suddenly almost decapitated and bloodless when an hour before, it was not even dead yet.then i woke up

That was awesome.

KontanKarite · 08-03-2008, 03:39 PM

So had an awkward night last night. The ex was breathing fire for the circus show at a local club. She invited me. After the show, which was good, they were passing out 20 dollar gift cards for gas. I had to do an arm wrestling match and me and the guy struck a deal. I win, we split the pot. Fine. Go. Done. Then the lovely tranny next to me decides she wants to give me yet another 20 dollars for gas... if I stripped for the club. The air was cold on my skin, but the orange light kept the goose bumps from making my nipples hard. I was smiling, in my happy place where my actions were my own and I NEEDED that spontaneity. I NEEDED that crazy moment. Right in front of her, unawares that she actually gave a shit as to what she was witnessing. This is when you find out people really kinda desire you in some way. When they tell you that they're bothered about a club full of hungry eyes is staring at your alabaster skin, that was once theirs but is no longer. She was breathing fire for the show. I was in the dunking booth, playing in the water.

Later that night, she crashed at my place. No cuddles were shared, no niceties or reassurances that everything is alright. Part of me is in love and part of me is wanting to put it all behind me and find another brand of crazy to play with. I'll be damned if I let someone throw me under the bus again when times get tough. Though my affection is one sided and biased, come hell or high water, I will find validation.

...I'm actually a very ugly person right now I think. Better serve it up with a big helping of honesty.

Crying_Crimson_Tears · 08-03-2008, 04:07 PM

The police are driving me fucking mad.

KontanKarite · 08-03-2008, 04:33 PM

Oh, and all that before...

I was at a bus stop in a somewhat yuppie part of town. Hecklers... everywhere.

I almost caused a car wreck at the intersection because a fucking dumbass decided to rubber neck and gawk at me, slamming his breaks at a green light. Fucking idiots.