Should i feel guilty?

[Lucretia_my_Reflection]

About six, months ago i hurt myself really badly in an attempted to take my own life, i feel really really confused about this. Should i feel guilty or not. I've had people tell me the i am selfish it hurts when they say that. And just little things people say to me they hurt they stick with me and come back and haunt me at the worst possible times. People think its okay to treat me badly because i am worthless and i am starting to agree with them. I don't feel good enough to please people, my hair, my smile, not smart enough, not funny enough etc.

[Kraven de Sade]

You should feel guilty... that is, you should feel guilty if you consider what others think about you more important than what you think about yourself. Other than that, you should not feel guilty. I know. I tried taking my own life several times. I do not feel guilty about those times, nor do I eve regret them. But I do feel glad that they failed. Because they failed, I met the woman I love (and consequentially married), and I couldn't be happier about that. If others try to tell you that you're selfish for making the attempt, I suggest feeling nothing but pity for them. Chances are, they have no clue why you did what you attempted, and as such, they have no right to tell you how to feel.

[Renatus]

I wish I could find a way to help this one girl I know realize that Kraven.

[Kraven de Sade]

Originally Posted by Renatus

I wish I could find a way to help this one girl I know realize that Kraven.

...pardon?

[maggot]

"I wish I could find a way to help this one girl I know realize that, Kraven."

[MollyMac]

Feel how you feel, there really aren't any "So, you survived 101" guides, ya know?

I will say that the pain you caused others is something that should cause remorse and guilt for what you did to them. BUT, at th esame time, you have to look at your reasons and sort your stuff out, get to a level playing field with yourself. Once you get on an even keel, then you can apologize or whatever it is in you to do to others. But until you come to your own terms, it may not be right or appropriate.

Guilt is one thing, accountability in taking care of yourself is another

[Kraven de Sade]

Originally Posted by maggot

"I wish I could find a way to help this one girl I know realize that, Kraven."

Ah. Believe it or not, the comma makes all the difference.

In all honesty, the best thing you can do is simply to talk to her. If she fails to realize what you're talking about, she's either an idiot (and I'm not trying to be offensive, here), or she simply refuses to understand. The second possibility is quite common, both to those who are suicidal and those who are post-suicidal.

[Renatus]

We both are pst suicidal is there any hope?

[Kraven de Sade]

Originally Posted by Renatus

We both are pst suicidal is there any hope?

Why shouldn't there be hope? I'm post-suicidal, and I'm content. (I would say "happy," except I don't really know what happiness is. I've never experienced it.) You know the old saying... Where there is life there is hope.

[KontanKarite]

What in the ever loving fuck is this?

This is Lucretia_my_Reflection's thread. Renatus, if your claim in this thread is the same as the one you made in the general discussion, please, get the hell back in YOUR thread.

I've seen some thread jacking before, but god damn it...

Lucretia, no one should try to make you feel like shit for the things you did. Take the time, feel guilty, get past it and rise above those dumb fucks who don't know how great you actually are.

[Vako]

Originally Posted by Lucretia_my_Reflection

About six, months ago i hurt myself really badly in an attempted to take my own life, i feel really really confused about this. Should i feel guilty or not. I've had people tell me the i am selfish it hurts when they say that. And just little things people say to me they hurt they stick with me and come back and haunt me at the worst possible times. People think its okay to treat me badly because i am worthless and i am starting to agree with them. I don't feel good enough to please people, my hair, my smile, not smart enough, not funny enough etc.

No need to feel guilty. That is a waste of your energy. Just change the behavior. From what you wrote, you seem to be a very caring, compassionate, understanding person. You worry waaay too much about having other people's approval. People are mean. The world is hard. Butch up. Lighten up. Acknowledge your own inner strength. Then some (a small few) people will respect you, because they will understand that you respect yourself. They will be the ones that will be worth your time.

I'm also "post-suicidal", and I understand where you are coming from. Get a backbone. Erase the yellow stripe off your back. Stop thinking like a coward.

[Kraven de Sade]

Originally Posted by KontanKarite

This is Lucretia_my_Reflection's thread. Renatus, if your claim in this thread is the same as the one you made in the general discussion, please, get the hell back in YOUR thread.

I've seen some thread jacking before, but god damn it...

Oh, was he saying the same thing in some other thread? I wasn't aware.

I apologize to Lucretia. (For responding, and allowing the thread to be jacked, that is.)

[killer_asian_Dax]

I would say don't feel guilty. Are you going to? Probably. And that's okay and natural.

In some ways it is selfish; but at the same time don't put too much weight into it. People will call you selfish and stupid because of it, but they don't know the story behind what they see.

You're alive (luckily) so start anew. Try getting a hobby that'll run the piss out of you like going to the gym. Or playing some sort of sport.

Because I don't know the particulars of why you did it, I can only tell you so much, but thank the whatevers you're alive, try again, and try a new plan.

Trust me- you don't want to have to die and come back to figure that out like I did. It's a pain.

[Dancing_in_rain]

Lucretia, in my humble opinion, you have nothing to feel guilty about. The people who tell you that (you should feel guilty) should be ashamed of themselves. You need to appreciate yourself for who you are, think of who would miss you had you taken your life, know your value. The people who put you down by telling you that your suicide attempt was selfish are people who lack deep compassion. I hope you're okay now. Please be careful. Death is much too final to be taken lightly.

[Lapin]

Originally Posted by MollyMac

Feel how you feel, there really aren't any "So, you survived 101" guides, ya know?

Ah, if only. They call it therapy though. Not quite as clear-cut.

Lucretia, some people arn't worth the space they occupy, especially the ones who can't comprehend 'empathy', only 'self-centered'. What they're doing is taking your pain and your right to feel it away from you and making it all about them, which they can do because they've never let your self-confidence build up enough to the point you'll tell them to shove off.

You've got no reason to feel guilt. You've got reason to brood, scream, cry and write angsty poetry until you feel a little better though. So tell these fuckers to bite your pretty ass and try to find a therapy group. At least people there will understand what you're going through.

And don't forget the 'pretty ass' part. It's just fun to say, 'bite my pretty ass'. (giggle)

[killer_asian_Dax]

Never say sorry, never regret anything, don't answer to anyone but youself, keep your head up, don't take guff from anyone, YOU are the most important person in your life.

These are the ingredients for a well lived and appreciated life.

[prophecyofdoom]

Lucretia, you are not worthless and it is not okay to treat you badly. People are assholes and are not worth pleasing. It takes a special kind of asshole to say nasty and hurtful things to a suicidal person. Fuck them and what they think. You are more than your hair, your smile, your IQ. You need not be attractive, witty, or successful to deserve love. To be valued and appreciated. The world is full of agony, misery, and pain. I think no less of you for being overwhelmed by it. People who don't know what you've suffered have no right to judge what you've done. Do not dwell on regret, do not waste the emotional energy that would be better spent figuring out how to heal yourself.

[james"bloody tears"]

im nothing but a run away, no good, life destroying peice of crap and yet im still loved and cared for. its not the bad opinions of bad people who count but those that come from those who care that matter. heres what my wife had to say:
"what does she have to feel guilty about? It's stupid to try and take her life, but she shouldn;t listen to those idiots. if anything, they should feel guilty. she feels bad enough to try and commit suicide, and all they can do is bash her more. she has nothing to be guilty about, except maybe listening to them. and she's not worthless, either. somewhere there's someone who'll tell her that"

[DarkGentleman]

Lucretia, my dear, there is nothing to feel guilty about. I was the same way myself and I did let people walk all over me because of it. This can be an issue on the lack of self esteem or I could be wrong. We make mistakes in life, it's part of the balance and no one is perfect either.
Confusing emotions can be hard to understand most times, I've always asked myself, "Why do I feel this way and how can I deal with it?".
Therefore, I simply think about it, talk to a friend/family or do something I enjoy doing to make myself feel better.
I simply be myself, I don't have to prove to anyone if I am atrractive, intelligent or be funny enough. If they accept me for who I am, it's ok and if not, then I move along without my wasting time on them.

I recall saying this before: People who tear you down actually hate themselves and they do it to make themselves feel better.

You are young and there is a path ahead of you. My advice: stay on that path and don't let people try to push you off it (don't dare jump off it either). If you stopped because a mistake was made, then learn from it and step forward to move along.

You are worth being a beautiful person and loving yourself should be enough for you to enjoy happiness you deserve.

You have made me feel more welcome here since I joined Gnet, I owe you that.

[Lucretia_my_Reflection]

Thank you for your help, it was a step forward in the right direction to share it here. I feel sometimes i wish i wouldn't of told someone what i had done so i wouldn't feel what i do daily. I am very pleased that i wasn't put in a mental unit, because thats locking me away from the real world. I build up walls to keep people out very few people know the real me.

[Caught]

It's tough to let someone know the real you and you'll get hurt along the way but it's important to keep going and talk.

My best friend tried to kill herself, it was yet another thing I got extra with the rest of bad luck I had then. So what did I do? I was annoying to her, maybe even mean but I let her know that what she did was wrong and she may have felt guilty, maybe I even hope she did, 'cause knowing any of your friends tried to kill her/himself is a horrible thing. Don't think your friends are just mean to you, try to understand them.

[ashtraygirl]

dont feel guilty. you probably didnt relize how shelfish of a desision it would be. i went thought issuses like that about 3 years ago.. i eventually relized that in the end everything turns out okay. you can change your own future. and dont let anyone else control your emotions. <3

[biohazard]

Try not to feel guilty for that, afterall, a much better something awaits us after death.

[Caught]

Originally Posted by biohazard

Try not to feel guilty for that, afterall, a much better something awaits us after death.

Like what?

[Lucretia_my_Reflection]

Is it a bad thing that im shy that i feel sick whenever walking down the street and i feel like running away whenever im at school, the large groups of "chavs" are my main worry they seem to be so much more intimating, then everyone else maybe its because they where verbally attacking me about a year ago. Does anyone have issues with shyness and feeling physically ill while walking down the street when your by yourself?

ugh im such a sook now im crying


somedays i get so caught up in it i stop talking