Red Sight

[Rebelious Goth]

The red sky has not been tainted blue
How I wish it wasn’t true
It is painted red from anger
And fear of all the danger
Red from the blood
That flows like a flood
It floods your mind
You do not wish to be kind
The red tree outside
Has never been snide
The red ground
Covered with blood abound
Just turned dark
When the flicker of one spark
Went out
There are so many who doubt
Who you really are
You scream, as you crash the car
Everything turns black
Which is better to have or to lack?
The black of death,
Or red of being alive and living in hell

[Underwater Ophelia]

I think the rhythm has it's good moments, but you need to work on your rhymes a bit, as sometimes it seems they don't really add anything to the poem. The bit about the tree being snide...I don't get it.

[Dead Blue Grind]

I agree with the previous statement. I think this poem would have turned out 10 times better if it didn't ryhme at all.

[Lord Macabre]

I also agree the ryhming takes away from the poem. Leave that to the G-Unit.