Memoir

[mindless1]

This is called "Beautiful Madness" it is an account of my experiences in the psych ward as well as afterwards. I need some reads and reviews. If anyone is interested let me know and I will post you the link, but I really would like a critique on it and someone to actually read it. It contains diary entries that I wrote while I was in there, as well as accounts of my first-hand experiences.
I might publish it somewhere but have not yet had any actual critiques so...hoping someone might read it even if it's on this site.
If anyone is interested then say so, or else i wont post the link. I dont want any bias against it either.

[La_Mort_Heureuse]

Might I suggest a title change? There is a biography of John Nash called "A Beautiful Mind" and a documentary about him called "A Brilliant Madness."

[mindless1]

The two titles are different.

[La_Mort_Heureuse]

Originally Posted by mindless1

The two titles are different.

Yes, but they are so similar that you might want to reconsider your choice.

[mindless1]

Do you have any suggestions?

[Mookie Lugubrious]

Post the link for Christ's sake!

oh, and how about:

A Wonderous Numbness

I'm just kidding. To be honest with you, memoirs don't require titles, they require dates.

[mindless1]

http://storywrite.com/story/show/90463

this is only a piece of it...

[mindless1]

http://storywrite.com/story/90483

This is the whole thing. If anyone bothers to read it please give me a response.

[mindless1]

This is not intended for the people on here that are asses.

[Extraordinary]

I got about halfway through it. I'll read the rest, don't worry. I left you a brief comment.

[Mookie Lugubrious]

As far as life advice goes, you need to steer clear of psych wards because you're not schizophrenic, and they truly are hell. The things I'd like to see brought out more is the misunderstandings between Annie and the doctor. How and why is the doctor misinterpreting Annie. What we get here is Annie's reaction and we have no sense of the events that caused it. Focus on events, stay in the present and describe what is *happening* almost to the exclusion of all else. These simple rules will help you turn your memoir into a fiction, with semi-autobiographical information serving as the foundation of the plot itself.

It might be interesting to see a character whose made crazier and crazier by an evil medical staff.

You've got a bundle full of ideas generated from your own experience, so work with them. See what you can do.

[Extraordinary]

The power is in the purity of the thoughts -- if you rewrite this with any goal in mind, it won't be honest. And if it's not honest, what's the point?

[La_Mort_Heureuse]

Originally Posted by Extraordinary

The power is in the purity of the thoughts -- if you rewrite this with any goal in mind, it won't be honest. And if it's not honest, what's the point?

I disagree. Refining writing creates a more polished, technically sound piece of work. It does not "pollute" thoughts, it hones them.

[mindless1]

I posted the link. Maybe you could read the story and see what you think of it?

[Mookie Lugubrious]

Originally Posted by Extraordinary

The power is in the purity of the thoughts -- if you rewrite this with any goal in mind, it won't be honest. And if it's not honest, what's the point?

Nothing is honest. The point is to turn a memoir into a fiction. The point is to turn a diary into a work of art.

If anyone was capable of it, it wouldn't be art. And it still wouldn't be honest.

[mindless1]

it's both honest and both exaggerated. which makes it more complex.

[mindless1]

I think it's a good idea to turn it into a fiction, but it's also a memoir. I have both. But making a fiction out of it would be fun. I want to be a talented writer someday so it's a good place to start.

[Extraordinary]

Originally Posted by Mookie Lugubrious

Nothing is honest. The point is to turn a memoir into a fiction. The point is to turn a diary into a work of art.

If anyone was capable of it, it wouldn't be art. And it still wouldn't be honest.

I know that was supposed to sound really profound, but you probably just ruined any integrity it had by saying that. I guess you're right: It's not honest, she completely made it up, that's why it still needs to be turned into fiction. The only reason you would revise a diary is if you planned on showing it to somebody else, and if you're writing for an audience, it's not much of a diary.

[Mookie Lugubrious]

Originally Posted by Extraordinary

I know that was supposed to sound really profound, but you probably just ruined any integrity it had by saying that. I guess you're right: It's not honest, she completely made it up, that's why it still needs to be turned into fiction. The only reason you would revise a diary is if you planned on showing it to somebody else, and if you're writing for an audience, it's not much of a diary.

I don't go about ruining integrity. What do you think of me? No. It's just impossible to talk about yourself honestly in my opinion.

And if you've been to the psyche ward, you know well enough to be whoever they tell you to be so you can get the fuck out of there faster. Is that honest? Not really, but it honestly will get you out faster to go along with psychiatrists. So the dishonesty in a sense is honest to the extent that it portrays a situation that I personally have been subjected to and that's being mislabeled, and playing along. I didn't mean to say this piece was false. Merely that honesty is impossible. You get opinions, perspectives often colored by moods and later contradicted.

You can talk about realism in a piece, but then again, people read books to escape, not to reproduce reality. Art is the lie that unveils the truth.

[mindless1]

I havent made any part of it up. The only revision i did was change the I's to she's and put it in third person. The annie character is me, but I called her annie to make it less personal.

You do have to play along for them to let you out.
But the diary itself, is completely accurate- the dates, the things i wrote down, all accurate.

[Dancing_in_rain]

For some reason, the link wouldn't work or me. They told me the file wasn't found...Shame. I wanted to read it.

[Minyaliel]

I'd like to read it as well. Mindless1, if you want me to read through it and give you some honest feedback, I'd be willing to do that for you. Perhaps it'd be possible to send it per email, since the site's dead? If not, let me recommend writing.com, a great site for putting up things like that (they have free accounts). I've got a poetry portfolio on there as well.

[mindless1]

Originally Posted by Minyaliel

I'd like to read it as well. Mindless1, if you want me to read through it and give you some honest feedback, I'd be willing to do that for you. Perhaps it'd be possible to send it per email, since the site's dead? If not, let me recommend writing.com, a great site for putting up things like that (they have free accounts). I've got a poetry portfolio on there as well.

although many on this site have been unjustifyingly cruel towards me, i hope that you are not the same. What I have written is somewhat personal, and I don't know how good of a story it makes.
http://storywrite.com/story/show/93021

[Circle V]

Originally Posted by mindless1

although many on this site have been unjustifyingly cruel towards me, i hope that you are not the same. What I have written is somewhat personal, and I don't know how good of a story it makes.
http://storywrite.com/story/show/93021

If you feel that you've been wronged, discuss it reasonably with the involved parties. Don't wear it like a badge. It's like responding to a stranger's hello with "My dog died."

[Minyaliel]

I'll comment directly on that site, if you don't mind... (no need to clutter up this thread)